Dorothy Sayers - Gaudy Night

“She looks quite normal.”

“So far as I know, she is. So far as I know, we all are.”

“I suppose,” said Miss Pyke, who had overheard the last remark, “even murderers look much like other people. Miss Vane. Or do you hold any opinions about the theories put forward by Lombroso? I understand that they are now to a considerable extent exploded.”

Harriet was quite thankful to be allowed to discuss murderers.

After Hall, Harriet felt herself rather at a loose end. She felt she ought to be doing something or interviewing somebody; but it was hard to know where to begin. The Dean had announced that she would be busy with some lists, but would be open to receive visitors later on. Miss Burrows the Librarian was to be engaged in putting the final touches to the Library before the Chancellor’s visit; she had been carting and arranging books the greater part of the day and had roped in a small band of students to assist her with the shelving of them. Various other dons mentioned that they had work to do; Harriet thought they seemed a little shy of one another’s company.

Catching hold of the Bursar, Harriet asked whether it was possible to get hold of a plan of the College and a list of the various rooms and their occupants. Miss Stevens offered to supply the list and said she thought there was a plan in the Treasurer’s office. She took Harriet across into the New Quad to get these things.

“I hope,” said the Bursar, ‘You will not pay too much attention to that unfortunate remark of Miss Burrows’ about the scouts. Nothing would please me more, personally, than to transfer all the maids to the Scouts’ Wing out of reach of suspicion, if that were practicable; but there is no room for them there. Certainly I do not mind giving you the names of those who sleep in College, and I agree, certainly, that precautions should be taken. But to my mind, the episode of Miss Lydgate’s proofs definitely rules out the scouts. Very few of them would be likely to know or care anything about proof sheets; nor would the idea of mutilating manuscripts be likely to come into their heads. Vulgar letters-yes, possibly. But damaging those proofs was an educated person’s crime. Don’t you think so?”

“I’d better not say what I think,” said Harriet.

“No; quite right. But I can say what I think. I wouldn’t say it to anybody but you. Still, I do not like this haste to make scapegoats of the scouts.”

“The thing that seems so extraordinary,” said Harriet, “is that Miss Lydgate, of all people, should have been chosen as a victim. How could anybody-particularly one of her own colleagues-have any grudge against her? Doesn’t it look rather as though the culprit knew nothing about the value of the proofs, and was merely making a random gesture of defiance to the world in general?”

“That’s possible, certainly. I must say, Miss Vane, that your evidence today has made matters very complicated. I would rather suspect the scouts than the S.C.R., I admit; but when these hasty accusations are made by the last person known to have been in the same room with the manuscript I can only say that-well, that it appears to me injudicious.”

Harriet said nothing to this. The Bursar, apparently feeling that she had gone a little too far, added:

“I have no suspicions of anybody. All I say is, that statements ought not to be made without proof.”

Harriet agreed, and, after marking off the relevant names upon the Bursar’s list, went to find the Treasurer.

Miss Wilson produced a plan of the College, and showed the positions of the rooms occupied by various people.

“I hope this means,” she said, “that you intend to undertake the investigation yourself. Not, I suppose, that we ought to ask you to spare the time for any such thing. But I do most strongly feel that the presence of paid detectives in this college would be most unpleasant, however discreet they might be. I have served the College for a considerable number of years and I have its interests very much at heart. You know how undesirable it is that any outsider should be brought into a matter of this kind.”

“It is, very,” said Harriet. “All the same, a spiteful or mentally deficient servant is a misfortune that might occur anywhere. Surely the important thing is to get to the bottom of the mystery as quickly as possible; and a trained detective or two would be very much more efficient than I should be.”

Miss Allison looked thoughtfully at her, and swayed her glasses to and fro slowly on their gold chain.

“I see you incline to the most comfortable theory. Probably we all do. But there is the other possibility. Mind you I quite see that from your own point of view, you would not wish to take part in an exposure of a member of the Senior Common Room. But if it came to the point, I would put more faith in your tact than in that of an outside professional detective. And you start with a knowledge of the workings of the collegiate system, which is a great advantage.”

Harriet said that she thought she would know better what to suggest when she had made a preliminary review of all the circumstances.

“If,” said Miss Allison, “you do undertake an inquiry, it is probably only fair to warn you that you may meet with some opposition. It has already been said-but perhaps I ought not to tell you this.”

“That is for you to judge.”

“It has already been said that the narrowing-down of the suspects within the limits mentioned at today’s meeting rests only upon your assertion. I refer, of course, to the two papers you found at the Gaudy.”

“I see. Am I supposed to have invented those?”

“I don’t think anybody would go as far as that. But you have said that you sometimes received similar letters on your own account. And the suggestion is that-”

“That if I found anything of the sort I must have brought it with me? That would be quite likely, only that the style of the things was so like the style of these others. However, I admit you have only my word for that.”

“I’m not doubting it for a moment. What is being said is that your experience in these affairs is-if anything-a disadvantage. Forgive me. That is not what I say.”

“That is the thing that made me very unwilling to have anything to do with the inquiry. It is absolutely true. I haven’t lived a perfectly blameless life, and you can’t get over it.”

“If you ask me,” said Miss Allison, “some people’s blameless lives are to blame for a good deal. I am not a fool, Miss Vane. No doubt my own life has been blameless as far as the more generous sins are concerned. But there are points upon which I should expect you to hold more balanced opinions than certain people here. I don’t think I need say more than that, need I?”

Harriet’s next visit was to Miss Lydgate; her excuse being to inquire what she should do with the mutilated proofs in her possession. She found the English Tutor patiently correcting a small pile of students’ essays.

“Come in, come in,” said Miss Lydgate, cheerfully. “I have nearly done with these. Oh, about my poor proofs? I’m afraid they re not much use to me. They’re really quite undecipherable. I’m afraid the only thing is to do the whole thing again. The printers will be tearing their hair, poor souls. I shan’t have very much difficulty with the greater part of it, I hope. And I have the notes of the Introduction, so it isn’t as bad as it might have been. The worst loss is a number of manuscript footnotes and two manuscript appendices that I had to put in at the last moment to refute what seemed to me some very ill-considered statements in Mr. Elkbottom’s new book on Modern Verse-Forms. I stupidly wrote those in on the blank pages of the proofs and they are quite irrecoverable. I shall have to verify all the references again in Elkbottom. It’s so tiresome, especially as one is always so busy towards the end of term. But it’s all my own fault for not keeping a proper record of everything.”