Ronald Tierney - Good To The Last Kiss - Crimes of the Depraved Mind Series

‘Need help?’ he asked her.

She kind of jerked her head up in surprise. ‘Oh’ slipped from her lips almost accidentally.

‘Didn’t mean to scare you,’ he said, looking from her eyes to her long, graceful neck.

‘It’s all right,’ she said. But it was obvious she didn’t mean it. ‘I don’t need help.’

She was definitely scared. Her eyes darted about like a bird’s. She was in her twenties, late twenties. Older than he normally found to be right.

‘I can check the oil for you.’ He noticed movement in the backseat of her car. It was a child. The child was in a car seat. It wouldn’t be a problem.

‘I’m in a hurry.’ She said it hurriedly.

It would be tough for him to let her go.

One more, he thought. ‘Then I’ll stop it. If I have to kill myself to do it, I’ll stop it. After this one.’

He had miscalculated. When next he looked up she was paying for her gas. He shut off his pump immediately; but she was on her way back to her car. He had to pay. Pay quickly. Just as he got to the register the guy behind the counter got a phone call. He chatted. She was in her car. For a moment he thought about making a break, leaving a twenty and a ten dollar bill on the counter to cover the twenty-one on the pump. No. Damn. Fuck. She was driving away. She peeled out of the station as if she knew of her specific and immediate peril.

Damn, he was getting too desperate, too careless. He’d have to make it through tonight.

He didn’t understand these mood swings. How quickly fear would overtake his confidence or – as quick as the flick of a switch – how suddenly he could see so clearly the object of his desire and know how to obtain it.

The steroids, probably, he thought. Cool it, he told himself.

The next day seemed especially long for Julia Bateman. Because Paul was to pull eight hours on Saturday and Sunday, Julia took Friday by herself. There wasn’t much of a point. The subject of her investigation hadn’t budged from the house.

She discovered Thaddeus standing in front of the entrance to the Estrella when she returned home.

‘No,’ she said, simply.

‘Why don’t I go with you?’ he asked.

‘No,’ she said again.

‘We can go to Mexico.’

‘That’s not the point. The point is that I need a rest. A little solitude. And there’s no point at all in the two of us doing much of anything together.’

‘You’re terrible,’ he said, smiling.

‘I do mean it.’

‘Look, what’s wrong with Mexico?’

‘Nothing. Go. Enjoy yourself.’ Julia turned, took the keys from her purse and moved into the small entryway before the locked doors.

He followed.

‘The only thing about the lovely middle class is that they put such limits upon themselves. They can’t allow someone to do something nice for them. They can’t do anything on the spur of the moment. Let me show you an extraordinary place in Costa Rica. Really. It’s not the least bit decadent.’ He smiled. ‘It’s wholesome and everything.

She had to acknowledge that part of her, the ‘I don’t want to be indebted’ part of her personality. She might also have to agree that she lacked real spontaneity.

‘Thanks,’ she said, putting the key into the lock. ‘But I don’t want to go.’

‘Do it for me, please. I am so bored. Everybody I know is so cynical about all the things one shouldn’t be cynical about and not the least bit cynical of the things they should. I want to show you this absolutely incredible jungle in Costa Rica. You won’t regret it. We’ll be like brother and sister or two five-year-olds on a hike into the woods. We won’t even play doctor. It will be fun. Innocent. An adventure.’

‘Please take no for an answer,’ she said. She knew she was being stubborn. She also felt her resolve slip. She was more than tempted to accept. And what would be wrong with that? Nothing, except that she didn’t want things to move as fast as they would if the two of them were to spend that kind of time in that kind of place – just the two of them.

She didn’t want to feel what she was feeling. There was no way the two of them would be forever. And she didn’t want a short-term emotional investment with someone who was improbably but definitely appealing. ‘No.’ She stared at him before going in.

‘You must let me help you experience what it means to be alive.’ Thaddeus was speaking to no one now.

The next morning Thaddeus tried calling her. The answering machine picked up. He decided not to leave a message. She was on her way to the river, apparently.

He called David Seidman. And Seidman agreed to meet him at the club. An hour of handball. A quick lunch. David could squeeze it in, he said.

Seidman picked up a surprising win. He hadn’t been skillful, but he was full of determination. Thaddeus called it ‘heart’ and was pleased. Winning wasn’t the objective for Maldeaux. Never was. Keeping fit, challenging himself was. For Seidman winning was the purpose of the game. It was the purpose of life.

Seidman smiled through the perspiration. He had stopped to talk to someone in the hall that led to the locker room. Maldeaux had showered and was nearly dressed when David came in still wearing a smile.

‘Good work,’ Maldeaux said.

‘Thanks Teddy,’ David said. ‘Why don’t you grab a drink and I’ll catch up with you in the lounge. Don’t order me one, though. I’ve got an appearance at three.’

‘Fine,’ Thaddeus said, giving his friend a friendly punch to the shoulder before heading for the door.

‘Oh Teddy!’ Seidman said.

‘What?’

‘I’m out of toothpaste.’

Teddy came back, opened his locker. ‘Take what you need.’

‘So how serious are you? About Julia, I mean?’ Maldeaux asked his friend at the bar.

‘She’s not your type Teddy. Simple. Sometimes a little goofy.’

‘Goofy?’ Maldeaux smiled.

‘Yes. I’m not saying she’s dumb. Sometimes a little scattered. She’s smart, runs her own business… but…’ Seidman was flustered, having trouble finding the words. ‘Very independent, not the type who is content to hang on the arm of a man.’

‘We’ve gotten off the track here. I just asked if you were serious?’

‘Right.’

‘You’re not saying?’

‘No. It’s none of your business.’

‘You’re serious. She’s not.’

‘Dammit, Teddy!’ He looked around. He’d said it too loud. But the crowd was too courteous to stare. ‘I love her. It’s just not going to happen.’

‘Then why hang on?’

The table was ready. Once seated, the lunches arrived. A salad for Maldeaux. A steak for Seidman.

‘We’re just friends now,’ Seidman said. He was still nervous. The bright energy he exuded after the win was now a dark, brooding silence. After several moments, he blurted: ‘Go for it!’

‘I sort of… have,’ Thaddeus said. ‘I mean I don’t know where it’s going. What I find attractive…’

‘I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to hear about your sexual Olympics. It’s disgusting.’

‘No, no. The attraction is not sexual. That’s what I’m trying to say. You say she’s bright. She’s truly bright. Her mind is like a blossom, ready to bloom.’

‘Her mind, you say?’ Seidman said with disgust.

‘I know. Maybe I’m changing a little…’

‘Let’s talk about something else.’

‘What?’

‘You didn’t have any toothpaste.’

Maldeaux laughed. ‘I’m deeply sorry. Actually, I do. It’s in a tin. Powder.’

‘You’re so fucking weird,’ Seidman said. ‘Who has tooth powder these days?’

‘I was somewhere in Europe when I ran out.’

‘And that bottle of cologne. That was cologne wasn’t it, the one with the handwritten number?’