Iris Johansen - Eight Days To Live

Caleb tilted his head. “Or it might have been a case of remote viewing.”

“Remote viewing? What on earth is that?”

“It’s a technique that the CIA has been experimenting with though they don’t admit to it. It’s rather like astral projection or out-of-body experience where their psychic agent actually can mentally go to a place or situation and view it. I guess you could call it a form of psychic espionage.”

She frowned. “In dreams?”

“Or deep hypnosis, or, if they’re gifted enough, they merely concentrate and pull it off. If that mosaic of Judas is that close in resemblance to your painting, then maybe you did a little mental visiting.”

“The CIA? That’s absolutely absurd. They wouldn’t be doing experiments like that.”

“No? As I said, they’re very careful of their credibility, but the intelligence community will do anything to keep the advantage. When they learned the Chinese and Russians were ahead of them in experimentation they jumped on the bandwagon in 1972. There was even a multimillion-dollar research program called the Star-gate Project, which came to light in the nineties, that probed military applications of psychic phenomena.”

“And they claimed it worked?”

“Of course not. That would be giving away a valuable asset and endanger their psychic operatives.”

“Or they were embarrassed to admit that they’d even entertained the idea of anything so crazy.” She added curtly, “If remote viewing even exists, I have nothing to do with it. That’s even more bizarre than thinking I’m attuned to those idiots’ vibes.”

“I’m just exploring possibilities. I’m finding that one very promising. It would explain why you-”

“And I’m finding it total bullshit.”

He held up his hand. “No need to become upset. I’ll keep my thoughts to myself for the present.”

“Good idea.”

“Go to sleep,” Caleb said. “I’ll try to stop asking questions. I’m not trying to catch you at a weak moment. It’s just my nature.”

“I don’t have to answer your questions.”

He was silent a moment. “I might have nudged a little.”

“What?”

“Just a little. Then I backed away. And I’m admitting it, aren’t I?”

She stared at him in disbelief. “And that makes everything all right?”

“No, but it makes it a little less threatening. And I took ‘no’ for an answer.”

“I don’t want to talk to you anymore, Caleb.”

“I know. I had to tell you. You’d have wondered later, and it might have damaged our relationship.”

He was totally impossible. One moment she was chilled and terrified by him. The next he was showing her a side that was almost vulnerable. “We have no relationship.”

“Yes, we do.” His eyes were holding her own, and she was aware that the sensuality she had thought gone was still there, waiting. “I don’t know what it’s going to turn out to be. It’s tentative, but I’m working on it.” His voice was velvet soft. “Sleep well, Jane.”

“TAKE IT.” JUDAS THREW the pouch on the ground at the feet of the high priest, Caiaphas. “I don’t want it. I never wanted it. You made me take it.”

“You wanted it.” The high priest’s lips curled. “Don’t lie. But now you’re having second thoughts. I don’t know why. Everything is working out quite well.”

“I didn’t think it would be like this.” Tears were running down his face. “They all think I’m Satan. I tell you, he wanted to die. I only helped him.”

“So it didn’t hurt to take a few pieces of silver?” Caiaphas said sarcastically. “I understand. I would have done the same.”

“I don’t want your understanding.” Judas’s hands clenched at his sides. “I want you to take the money and tell everyone I gave it back.”

The high priest stared down at the pouch on the floor. “There are difficulties. It’s blood money. I’m not sure it should return to our coffers. No, you’ll have to keep it.”

“I can’t keep it,” Judas said hoarsely. “It’s dirty. Every time I touch it, I feel the filth enter my soul.”

“Oh, it’s the money that’s dirty?” The high priest’s brows rose. “One would think that the act, not the payment, would be dirty. Betrayal is so very ugly, Judas.”

“Take it,” Judas said. “It’s all there. Pick up the pouch.”

Caiaphas slowly shook his head. “You say to touch it makes you feel the filth. I cannot take a chance of destroying the purity of my calling.”

“Pick it up!” Judas screamed. “Take it. Tell them I didn’t mean to-”

“Leave the temple. You’re beginning to annoy me. Your task is done.” He turned away. “Tell your friend, Jesus, that you meant no harm. I doubt if he will believe you either. As far as I’m concerned, the matter is closed.”

“Take back your money! Please.” He gazed in agony as the high priest walked away from him. It was not going to happen. He was forever going to be damned in the eyes of the world .

Not in the eyes of God. Surely God would realize he meant only to help perform His will .

Or had that really been his intention?

Was he lying to himself as the priest had said?

He had been disappointed when they had arrived in Jerusalem and there had been no magical coming of the kingdom as he had interpreted should happen from Jesus’s teaching. Had he meant to force that coming by betraying Jesus?

What was truth or lies?

Doubt was twisting, sickening him, darkening the world .

Answer .

He had to find the answer .

He turned and stumbled out of the temple .

“They would not take it?” Hadar asked. The young scribe rose to his feet as Judas appeared in the street. “They did not believe you?”

Judas shook his head. “He left the pouch lying on the floor of the temple. The high priest, Caiaphas, wouldn’t risk soiling himself by touching it.”

“I’ll go get it and bring it back to you.”

“No!” He started down the street. “Don’t you realize that would damn me forever?” He was sobbing. “As if I was not damned already.”

“But you are innocent.”

“Am I?” He had convinced Hadar, but how was he to make himself believe when his heart was shriveling within him with doubt . Hadar had been one of the faithful who had followed the disciples from town to town, and he had attached himself to Judas with a tenacity that had first flattered him, then brought him comfort. He could neither read nor write, and yet this scribe looked upon him with adoration. Hadar had clung to him even after everyone else had turned their backs in horror. “The priests say that I wanted the money. That it’s blood money. His blood .

“All lies. You’ll be a prince in God’s heaven. We’ll both be there together just as you promised me.” Hadar’s lips thinned, his eyes blazing with rage. “I could kill them all. I will kill them.”

A young boy willing to bathe in blood for Judas’s sake .

Blood. Crucifix. Jesus .

Dear God in heaven. What have I done?

He started to run through the streets, pushing through the crowds .

“Judas!” He heard Hadar calling from behind him. “Wait!”

He could not wait. He could not face Hadar again. He could not face the world again .

Betrayal .

Eternal damnation .

Guilt .

“JANE. Wake up.”

She was being shaken.

Her lids flew open.