Danielle Steel - Jewels

“Would I be able to have more children, if I had one?” He hesitated and then shook his head, feeling he owed her the truth.

“No, you wouldn’t.”

“Then I don’t want one.”

“Then walk a great deal, move around, get exercise, swim if there is a river near your house. It will all help you with the birth, Madame la Duchesse.” He always bowed politely when she left, and although she didn’t like his threat of a cesarean, she liked him. And she said nothing at all to William about the baby being large, or the possibility of a cesarean section at the birth. There was one thing she was sure of, and that was that she wanted more children. And she was going to do everything she could not to jeopardize that.

The baby was still a week or two away when Germany and Russia signed a pact of nonaggression, leaving only France and Britain as potential allies, since Hitler had already signed a pact with Mussolini, and Spain was virtually destroyed and could help no one.

“It’s getting serious, isn’t it?” Sarah asked him quietly one night. They had just moved into their room in the château, and with all the little details still to be done, she thought she had never seen anything as beautiful, which was exactly how William felt when he looked at Sarah.

“It’s not good. I should probably go back to England at some point, just to see what they think at Number Ten Downing.” But he hadn’t wanted to worry her with it. “Maybe we’ll both go back for a few days, after the baby comes.” They wanted to show it to his mother anyway, so Sarah made no objection to the plan.

“It’s hard to believe we’d go to war, England, I mean.” She was beginning to think of herself as one of them, even though she had kept her American citizenship when she married William, and he saw no particular reason for her to change it. All she wanted was for the world to settle down long enough for her to have her baby. She didn’t want to have to worry about a war, when she wanted to find a quiet home for their child. “You won’t leave if something happens, William, will you?” She looked at him in sudden panic, running all the possibilities over in her mind.

“I won’t leave before the baby comes. I promise you that.”

“But afterwards?” Her eyes were wide with terror.

“Only if there’s a war. Now stop worrying about all that. It’s not healthy for you right now. I’m not going anywhere, except to the hospital with you, so don’t be silly.” She had mild pains as she lay in their new room with him that night, but by morning they were gone and she felt better. It was silly to worry about war now, she was just nervous about the baby, she told herself the next morning when she got up.

But on September first, as she hammered on a cabinet upstairs, on the floor of small bedrooms above theirs, which would make wonderful children’s bedrooms one day, she heard someone shout something unintelligible below her, and then she heard running downstairs, and thought someone might be hurt, so she went all the way down to the main kitchen to help. But they were listening to the wireless there.

Germany had just attacked Poland, with ground troops and by air. William was standing there, listening to the broadcast, and with him every man in the place. Afterwards they all argued about whether or not France would attempt to rescue Poland. A few of them thought they should, many of them didn’t care. They had their own troubles at home, their families, their problems, some of them thought Hitler should be stopped before it was too late for all of them, and Sarah stood there, in terror, staring at William and the others.

“What does this mean?”

“Nothing good,” he said honestly. “We’ll have to wait and see.” They had just finished the roof on the house, the windows were sealed, the floors were done, the bathrooms had been put in, but the details remained to be attacked. Nonetheless, the lion’s share of the work had been done, her home was complete and safe from the elements and the world, in time for her to have her baby. But the world itself was no longer safe, and there was no easy way to change that. “I want you to forget about it right now,” he urged. He had noticed for the past two days that she had been sleeping fitfully, and he suspected that her time was coming closer. And he wanted her free of fear and concerns and worries when their baby came. It was a real possibility that Hitler wouldn’t stop with Poland. Sooner or later, Britain had to step forward and stop him. William knew that, but he didn’t say it to Sarah.

They ate a quiet dinner in the kitchen that night. As always, Sarah’s mind turned to serious things, but William tried to distract her. He wouldn’t let her talk about the news, he wanted her to think about something pleasant. He tried to keep her mind off world events by talking about the house, but it wasn’t easy.

“Tell me what you want to do with the dining room. Do you want to restore the original panelling, or use some of the boiseries we found in the stables?”

“I don’t know.” She looked vague as she tried to focus on his question. “What do you think?”

“I think the boiserie has a brighter look. The panelling in the library is enough.”

“I think so too.” She was playing with her food, and he could see she wasn’t hungry. He wondered if she was feeling ill, but he didn’t want to press her. She looked tired tonight, and worried. They all were.

“And what about the kitchen?” They had exposed all the original brick from four hundred years before, and William loved it. “I like it like this, but maybe you want something a little more polished.”

“I don’t really care.” She looked at him desolately suddenly. “I just feel sick every time I think of those poor people in Poland.”

“You can’t think about that now, Sarah,” he said gently.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not good for you or the baby,” he said firmly, but she started to cry as she left the table and began to pace the kitchen. Everything seemed to upset her more, now that she was so close to having their baby.

“What about the women in Poland who are as pregnant as I am? They can’t just change the subject.”

“It’s a horrifying thought,” he admitted to her, “but right now, right this minute, we can’t change that.”

“Why not, dammit? Why? Why is that maniac doing that to them?” she ranted, and then sat down again, breathless and obviously in pain.

“Sarah, stop it. Don’t upset yourself.” He made her go upstairs and insisted that she lie down on the bed, but she was still crying when she did. “You can’t carry the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

“Those aren’t my shoulders, and that’s not the world, it’s your son.” She smiled through her tears, thinking again how much she loved William. He was so unfailingly good to her, so tireless, he had been so incredible restoring the château, he had worked endlessly only because she loved it. Except that he had come to love it, too, by then, and knowing that touched her as well.

“Do you suppose this little monster is ever going to come out?” she asked, sounding tired as he rubbed her back. He still had to go downstairs and put away the dinner things, but he didn’t want to leave her until she’d relaxed, and it was obvious to him that she hadn’t, and probably wouldn’t for a while.

“I think he will eventually. He’s right on schedule for the moment. What did Lord Allthorpe say? September first? That’s today, so he’s only late as of tomorrow.”

“He’s so big.” She was worried about being able to get the baby out. In the past few weeks she had grown even more enormous. And she still remembered what the local doctor had said about the baby being large.