Carole Douglas - Cat in a Red Hot Rage

“You mean 'illusions.' "

“No, just delusions. I had so many delusions that Curtiss actually came along a full nine months after them. I really enjoyed being a housewife and mother. Elmore was always on the road, selling insurance policies. Curtiss and I had six happy years together before Elmore came home one day and said he'd found another woman. What he'd meant was that a conniving cheerleader had found him and his house payment and steady job and little family to fling out on the stoop."

“That was Oleta."

“Yup. She always was a little—"

“I get the picture," Temple said quickly, trying to evade hearing another rough word from her landlady's mouth: slut.

“—snip. That's why I kept the last name 'Lark.' Just to annoy her. And it did."

“Why? You had moved on to Vegas and the Elmore Larks were in Florida."

“By then, I was old enough to start getting mad about being betrayed.”

Temple bit her lip and thought about feeling like a betrayer, which she did now. She'd always taken Electra at face value as a free spirit. She'd never guessed how many decades it had taken her to get that way.

“Men and women," Temple said, "seem to have a hard time getting in sync with each other in any era.”

Electra's face lost its pained, in-the-past expression and resumed the sweetly sharp look Temple knew so well. And relied upon. She was two thousand miles away from her mother, but they'd never quite evolved into girl talk, anyway. Kit and Electra made excellent stand-ins.

Electra pursed her lips, as if to say: Enough about my little murder rap and me. "You care to discuss what's happening on the Max-Matt front? I've been dying to know. Really. Dying.”

Temple didn't care to, but she could feel herself blushing, which was a dead giveaway in a modern girl that something was happening.

“How much do you know?"

“I'm a landlady. I always know more than I'm supposed to." Temple nodded and wished she'd been an old-fashioned girl with a handkerchief to knot.

“I know," Electra said, "that our darling boy Matt Devine has made major updates to his bedroom decor. About time! And that you've been up there admiring the changes."

“Electra!”

She shrugged. "You've always had an interest in interior design. And I know Max hasn't been around lately. Except for the time he called and you weren't in, so he took me for a ride on the Vampire.”

Temple was stunned silent. Max had been here, at the Circle Ritz? Recently? When she hadn't been? And he'd taken Electra for a ride on the vintage motorcycle he had traded to Electra for a down payment on the Circle Ritz unit back when he and Temple had been almost-marrieds?

“The Vampire," Temple repeated. "Max took you out on the Vampire?"

“You weren't here at the time, dear," Electra said gently. "I think . . . I think it was a farewell spin; that I do. He's a knight, Max, in shining midnight-black. Can give an old lady a thrill ride as well as a young one. And, I admit, I was thrilled."

“When? What day?"

“Why, I don't quite remember. Maybe four or five days ago. It felt like a sentimental journey, and I'm sure he'd have much rather had you riding pillion. But you weren't here.”

And now Max was not "here" at all.

Temple tried to make sense of the timeline. Did Max have time to squire Electra around on the Vampire and still shut down his house, sell it? Or had all that happened before he came back to the Circle Ritz for one last dashing surprise visit?

Only . . . Temple hadn't been there to be surprised, or kissed good-bye, or driven around the block. So Electra got it in her place: the cryptic, fond farewell. All Max, only Max, all the time.

“Temple. Dear. It's not all tragedy. Haven't you and Matt been—?"

“Yes. But it's tragedy if I never see Max again."

“I've never seen most of my husbands again." Electra leaned back into the sofa. "And you and Matt?”

Temple gave a deep sigh. "We may want a Lovers' Knot ceremony sometime soon."

“No! Really? I'm honored."

“Electra, Max is missing."

“Wasn't he always?"

“Not like this. For real! As far as I know, you're the last person to see him.”

She got it immediately. "Me, not you.”

Temple nodded.

“Then he doesn't know about you and Matt?"

“He's Max. He knew about me and Matt before me and Matt knew about us."

“That makes it worse."

“Right." Temple leaned forward and knotted her hands together. "I don't feel right about this. This is not the way Max would have bowed out, and I think he was probably ready to bow out."

“He was a little . . . the last time I saw him," Electra admitted. "A little what?"

“A little . . . nostalgic." Electra leaned forward to take Temple's hands in hers. "Listen, hon. If Max is as omniscient as you think he is, there's nothing you could do that surprises him. Maybe this was his graceful exit, like Sherlock Holmes falling into ReichenbachFalls. Maybe he thought people would want to forget about him."

“Like we could?”

Electra shook Temple's intertwined fingers. "He knows that. He knows that he'll be resurrected, that we won't stand for him being gone. Not even you and Matt. He'll come to your wedding. Trust me. He could never resist a surprise appearance.”

Temple sighed, shakily. Electra was right. You had to have faith in Max. That was what made him such a peerless magician. Now you see him, now you don't. But you will.

“Meanwhile," Temple said, "we've got to deal with your crisis."

“Right. So how is he?"

“Who? Max? I told you, I don't know and it's driving me crazy."

“No. Matt! I don't know and it's driving me crazy.”

“He's fine. He's still here."

“No, I meant, how's he in bed?"

“Electra!”

She shrugged. "It was a natural question, given his priestly history."

“I'm not asking you how Elmore Lark was in bed. Not that I'd ever want to know."

“It's no secret. He wasn't, so there's nothing to tell."

“You must have slept with him to have a son from the marriage.”

Electra pulled a face. "No, I was not a virgin bride in that instance. Curtiss was the only good thing that came out of that marriage. With the next husband, Gerry, I got a herpetologist."

“As in helping people with herpes?"

“No. As in snakes. I have a daughter with a fascination for reptiles. Now it's her career. Maybe she was trying to tell me something about my choice of husbands."

“So there was Darren, Billy, Elmore, Gerry . . . who else, and any more kids?"

“Weldon the Winn-Dixie manager and Tom, who couldn't even manage to hold a job. Terra in Indianapolis is a teacher and Rob in St. Louis is a car mechanic. Curtiss sells insurance in Tucson, which is lucrative. Sandy's the herpetologist in Texas. All grown and good kids and nicely on their own. They can't believe I married such a string of losers, though."

“In which case, you could be a suspect in a lot of deaths."

“No. The only one of my exes I might wish dead is that jerk Elmore. But I suppose I should wish him far away so I'm not tempted to confront the bum." Temple decided against telling Electra that her supposed almost not ex was here in town. She also was glad that she managed to get Electra's always-busy mind off of her and Matt's nocturnal adventures.

Better that she dwell on dead people.

“Can I go back to the convention now, Temple?" Electra inquired in a small wee voice. "I was supposed to be helping with registration."

“I don't see why not. Oleta's dead. How much more trouble could you get into?”

Chapter 17

Sob Sister, Soul Brother

Matt was finishing his afternoon laps in the Circle Ritz pool.