Ann Martin - Jessi's Babysitter

Applause broke out. Charlotte, looking shy but pleased, edged over to the judges, received her yellow ribbon, and scurried back to her table, where she proudly attached the ribbon to the sign she'd made for her project.

The next two winners were announced. They went to kids I didn't know. I sought out Kristy, Mal, and my other friends in the crowd. Except for Stacey, they looked as disappointed as I felt.

But nobody looked more disappointed than Jackie, even though an Honorable Mention ribbon was already being fastened to his desk. (Every kid except the three winners was given an Honorable Mention.) The Rodowskys and I crowded around The World of Volcanic Activity.

"Don't be too upset, honey," Mrs. Ro-dowsky told Jackie.

I had to speak up. "He has a right to be upset," I said.

Mr. and Mrs. Rodowsky turned to me.

"Why?" they asked at the same time.

"Because — because I gave him so much help with his project that he really didn't do much of it himself."

"Yeah," said Jackie, giving me the evil eyeball.

"I'm really sorry/' I went on. "I just wanted him to win. He's always saying he's no good at anything, or that he has bad luck. I wanted him to see that he can be a winner. I guess I went about it all wrong, though."

Mr. and Mrs. Rodowsky were really nice. They understood what had happened. I got the feeling that they might have done things like this for Jackie in the past. Mr. Rodowsky even admitted to building the glass and wood box for the volcano himself. (Well, with a teeny bit of help from Jackie.)

But Jackie, who's usually so easygoing and sunny, continued to scowl at me. "I just wanted to have fun," he said. "That was all. I just wanted to make a volcano erupt."

"Jackie, Jessi apologized to you," his father said gently.

"I know." Jackie finally managed a smile. But it quickly turned to a frown. "Oh, no," he muttered. "Here come John, lan, and Danny. They're 'going to laugh at me. I just know it."

But the three boys who approached us looked excited.

"Jackie," said one, "your volcano was totally rad. Make it explode again!"

"Yeah," said another. "That was so cool."

Jackie explained why he couldn't "explode" the volcano again.

"Oh, well," said the boys. "It was still awesome." They started to walk away. "See you in school on Monday!" one called over his shoulder.

Jackie grinned at me like the Cheshire Cat. "I don't believe it!" he cried.

Mr. and Mrs. Rodowsky were smiling, too. "You know," said Jackie's mom, "there'll be another science fair next year. Jessi, maybe you could try helping Jackie again."

"I don't think so," I said. "I better not."

"Good," replied Jackie. "Because if I'm going to lose, I want to do it all by myself!"

We laughed, even Shea and Archie. But while I was laughing, I was thinking about something. I needed to talk to my parents. And I needed to talk to them badly.

Chapter 14.

I left the Rodowskys and searched for my parents in the crowded all-purpose room. I finally found them at Charlotte's table, along with Becca, Charlotte's parents, Stacey, and of course, Charlotte.

I pulled my mother aside. "Mama? Can we go home now?"

"What's the matter, honey? Don't you feel well?" Mama's hand immediately went to my forehead. "No fever," she murmured.

"I feel fine," I told her. "I'm not sick. But I need to talk to you and Daddy. It's about Jackie and — and Aunt Cecelia and some other things. Please can we leave?"

"Of course we can." Mama looked alarmed.

We couldn't leave right away, though. Saying good-bye took awhile. Becca had to congratulate Charlotte one more time and finger the prized yellow ribbon. Then I ran into Kristy.

"Sorry about Jackie," she said sincerely.

"Thanks," I replied. "Sorry about David Michael."

Kristy smiled. "Thank you. But it's funny — he doesn't seem upset at all."

At last my family had made our way out to our car. As we drove home, Mama said, "Becca, Jessi wants to have a talk about some things with Daddy and me, so when we get to our house, could you keep Squirt and Aunt Cecelia company for awhile and let us have some privacy?"

"Okay." Becca sounded like she was on her way to the guillotine.

At home, Mama made tea, and she and Daddy and I sat at the kitchen table and sipped it.

"Now," said Mama, "tell us what's happened."

"Okay," I said, drawing in a breath. "It isn't something that just happened; it's something that's been going on for awhile. Only I didn't realize it — I mean, I didn't realize my part in it — until tonight, when Jackie didn't win a prize at the science fair."

My parents nodded, but they looked puzzled.

"See, this is what happened," I went on. "Jackie told me he thought it would be fun to

build a volcano. He likes messy things. He also said the school science fair was coming up. So I pushed him into entering. . . . And then I did his whole project for him."

"You what?" said Daddy.

"I did almost everything. I researched volcanoes. I made him memorize that speech. I even lettered the sign for his project. It was as if I didn't trust him. I treated him like a baby. I didn't listen to him. I just forged ahead and did everything my way, thinking it was better."

"Well, you certainly seem to have recognized your faults," said Daddy.

"Did you apologize to the Rodowskys?" asked Mama.

I nodded. "But that isn't all. See, there's Aunt Cecelia, too. Becca and I," (I had not planned to say this) "we call her Aunt Dictator. She is running our lives. She moved in here and she tells us what to do and what not to do. Or she does things for us. And she never listens to us and she certainly doesn't trust us. Do you know that she once wouldn't let me go to a BSC meeting because I was ten minutes late getting home and hadn't called her? I'd have called if I was going to be later than that — but not for ten minutes."

"Honey, why didn't you tell us about that?" asked Mama.

"Well, I did try to call Daddy at work," I admitted, "but Ed couldn't reach him. He said you were out of the office, Daddy. And then, well, Mama, I know your job is a big adjustment. I guess I just didn't want to bother you with Aunt Cecelia problems. You either, Daddy. She's your sister."

Mama and Daddy were silent for a moment. Then Daddy said, "I think it's time for a family conference."

(I knew he was going to say that.)

"Okay," I agreed. I guessed I could face Aunt Cecelia with Mama and Daddy and Becca around me.

Aunt Cecelia had just finished putting Squirt to bed, and she and Becca joined us in the kitchen. Mama poured tea for Aunt Cecelia and gave Becca a cup of juice.

Becca looked at me with eyes that were question marks.

"Cecelia," Daddy began, "it seems that Jessi hasn't been very happy lately. Becca, either. They feel . . . they feel that you don't trust them. They are big enough to do quite a few things on their own. We've been giving the girls a lot of responsibility. They're able to care

for Squirt and to take care of themselves. But they think that you want to do things for them — things they're capable of doing."

Aunt Cecelia's face turned stiff. "Perhaps you don't need me, then."

"Oh, yes, we do," Mama was quick to say. "The girls can't care for Squirt while they're in school, and — sorry, girls — but neither of them is much of a cook."

"I, urn, I can understand how it happened," I spoke up. "I mean, why you took over, Aunt Cecelia. If s easy to do. I completely took over with Jackie and his volcano." (I had to tell the science-fair story again.) "But the thing was, I just wanted to show him that I care. I wanted him to feel good about himself."

"And 7 only wanted to show you that I care," Aunt Cecelia said. "I want you girls to grow up to be kind, responsible, neat, and polite. You know, it's an awful thing to have to say, but sometimes black people have to work twice as hard to prove themselves. It isn't fair, but that's the way it is — sometimes."