Emma McLaughlin - The Nanny Diaries

And that you'll let him know when he has pushed too far. Trust me, he'll be relieved. Now, wait here while 1get theSophster."

He disappears into our lobby and I look up between the buildings to the orange sky above. Within minutes Sophie bursts through the front door, pulling the leash in his hand taut as she waggles over, smiling up at me as she always does. I crouch down, wrapping my arms around her neck, and burrow myheadinher brownandwhitefur.

"I'll walkher,Dad."I give him a hugandtaketheleash. "It'll begoodtobearoundsomeoneunderthree feetwho doesn't talkback."

"Andwhoonlysticksouther tongueforbiologicalnecessity!" hecalls after me.

I stand on the sidewalk outside Grayer's school on the following Monday. I'm ten minutes early, as per Mrs. X's strict instructions, so I flip through my Filofax and chart out the deadlines for my next two papers. A taxi comes to a screeching halt on the corner and I look up at the pandemonium of honking cars around it. Across the median a blond woman stands frozen under the shade of an awning. The cars move againandshe's gone.

I crane my head, trying to locate the woman, to be sure if it was Caitlin. But the other side of Park Avenueisnowempty,savefor a maintenanceman polishing a brass hydrant.

"Not you!" Grayer draaaaags himself all the way across the courtyard, as if he were marching toward certaindeath.

"Hey,Grayer. Howwasschool?"

"Yucky."

"Yucky?Whatwasyuckyaboutit?" 1 unpinthehomework, pass offthejuice.

"Nothing."

"Nothingwasyucky?" Buckleinstroller,unwrappears.

"I don't wanttotalktoyou."

I kneel in front of the stroller and look him squarely in the eyes. "Look, Grayer, I know you don't like me verymuch."

"I HATEYOU!" I am light. I am clarity. I am wearing a big,pinkdress.

"And that's okay, you haven't known me very long. But I like you a lot." He starts to kick his leg out at me. "I knowyoumissCaitlin." Hefreezesatthesoundof her nameandI catchhis foot

THE NANNY DIARIES

firmly in my hand. "It's okay to miss Caitlin. Missing her shows that you love her. But being mean to

me hurts myfeelings and I knowCaitlin would never want you to hurt anyone's feelings. So, as long as

we're together,let's havefun."Hiseyes arelikesaucers.

As we headout of the courtyard the rainthat's been threatening all morning finally breaks and I have to

pushGrayer backup to721ParkAvenueasif I'm intheStroller Olympics.

"Weeeeeeee!" he cries and I make race-car noises and steer sharply around puddles all the way home. By the time we get into the lobby we're both soaked and I pray Mrs. X isn't home to see how I've exposedher childtopneumonia.

"I sure am wet.Areyouwet,Grayer?"

"I suream. I sure am wet."He's smiling, buthis teetharestartingtochatter.

"We're gonna get you rightupstairs and into a hot bath. Ever had lunchinthe bath, Grayer?" I steer him

intotheelevator.

"Wait! Holdit!" a malevoice shoutsfromaroundthecorner.

I slamthestrollerintomyankletryingtoangleitawayfromthe door. "Ow,sh. ot!"

"Hey, thanks," he says. I look up from my ankle. The rain has plastered his brown, chin-length hair and

frayedblueT-shirt tohis six-foot frame. Oh,my.

Astheelevator closes hecrouchesdowntospeakdirectly tothestroller. "Hey,Grayer!Whassup?"

"She's wet."Grayer pointsbehindhim.

"Hi,wet girl.AreyouGrayer's girlfriend?" Hesmiles atme,tuckinghis damphairbehindhis ear.

"He's notsureif he's readytomakethatkindof commitment," I say.

"Well, Grayer,don't lether getaway."If youtriedtocatchme,I promise I wouldrunvery slowly.

We arrive attheninthfloorwaytoosoon. "Have a greatafternoon,guys," hesaysaswe getout.

"You, too!" I cry asthedoorslidesclosed.Whoareyou?

"Grayer,whois he?" Stroller unclasped,wetshirtoff.

"Helives upstairs. Hegoestobigboy's school."Shoesoff,pantsoff,grablunchbag.

"Oh,yeah?Whichone?" Follow nakedtushtobathroom, turnontap.

He thinks for a moment. "Where the boatsgo.With the lighthouse."Okaaay.Two syllables, soundslike

...

"Harbor?" I query.

"Yeah, he goes to Harbard." Hello, I can totally do Boston, especially with the shuttle. We could

alternateweekends... Jesus!EARTHTONANNY,COME IN,NANNY.'

"Okay, Grayer, let's get you in the tub." I heave him over the edge, letting go of my Harvard Hottie for

themoment. ."Grayer,doyouhave anickname?"

"What's anickname?"

"Aname thatpeoplecallyouthatisn't Grayer."

"Myname isGrayer X. That's myname."

"Well, let's think of one." 1 pop him in the tub and pass him his organic peanut butter and quince jelly

sandwich.He wiggleshis toes in thewater ashe munchesthesandwichandI cantell it feelsfabulously unorthodoxtohim. I lookaroundthebathroomandmyeyes landonhis blueSesameStreet toothbrush. "WhataboutGraver?" I ask.

Hemullsitover,his headcockedtooneside,his SeriousThinkingFaceon,thennods. "We'll tryit." Lord,hawmyheadaches!Whata headhaveI!Myback a t'otherside. h,myback,myback!Beshrew yourheartforsendingmeaboutTo catchmydeathwithjauntingupanddown!

. HENURSE,ROMEOANDJULIET CHAPTER TWO Multitasking Nanny,

While you. e on your play date withAlex today, please askAlex. mother who catered her lastdinner?tellherIthought Cajun?infusedAsianwas astrokeofgenius. Justtoletyouknow,theparentsareDIVORCING. Sosad. PleasemakesureGrayerdoesn. sayanythingawkward. I. lswingbyAlex. at4:30 totakeGrayer tohis orthodist. Seeyouthen?

"Nanny? Nanny?!" Mrs. X's disembodied voice calls out to me as I jog up the block toward the nursery

schoolcourtyard.

"Yes?" I say, spinningaround.

"Thisway."Thedoorof a LincolntowncarpopsopenandMrs. X's manicuredhandflagsmeover.

"I'm sogladyou're here,"I say, leaningdowntowhereshe's

seatedamid hershoppingbagsintheplushdarkness. "BecauseI needtoaskyou?

"Nanny,I justwanttoreiteratethat I'd likeyoutoalways getheretenminutesearly."

"Of course."

"Well, it's elevenfifty-five."

"I'm reallysorry. wastryingtofindGrayer's class list. I'm notsurewhichAlex?

But she's already busy rooting around in her purse. She pulls a small leather-bound notepad out of her

hobo bag. "I want to talk with you briefly about a party I'm throwing at the end of the month for the Chicago branch of Mr. X's company." She uncrosses and recrosses her legs, the lavender Prada shoes making an arc of bright color against the dark interior of the town car. "All the top executives will be there. t's a veryimportanteveningandI wantittobeperfectformyhusband."

"Soundslovely,"I say, unsurewhyI'm beingapprisedof thisfete.

ShelowershersunglassestomakesurethatI havetakeninevery word.

ShouldI bringmyformal weartothedry cleaner's?

"So, I may need you to run a few errands for me this month. It's just that I'm so overwhelmed with the

preparations and Connie's absolutely no help. So if there's anything I need I'll just leave you a note. t

reallyshouldn'tbemuch."

We both hear the heavy clank of the double doors opening behind me followed bythe growing swell of

children's laughter.

"I better run, if he sees me he'll just get all upset. Let's go, Ricardo!" she calls to the driver and he pulls

outbeforeshe's even gotherdoorclosed.

"Wait, Mrs. X,I neededtoaskyou a question?I callafter theretreatingtaillights.

TherearefourAlexandersandthreeAlexandrasinGrayer's class.

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I know. I checked. And now that Mrs. X has sped off I'm still at a complete loss as to which one is

supposedtobeourescortfortheafternoon.

Grayer,however,seems toknowexactlywho ourdateis.

"It's her. I have a play date with her," he says, pointing across the courtyard at a little girl hunkered

downover somethingintriguingatgroundlevel. I grabGrayer andmakeourwayover.

"Hi,Alex. We have aplaydatewith youthisafternoon!" I enthusiastically informher.