Christian Cameron - God of War - The Epic Story of Alexander the Great

Most of the time, it is human to react to hate with hate. Or love with love. But there was something in the hate of those Athenian women that made me feel only pity, anger, shame. Pity for them. Anger at the fools who had led them to fight us. Shame at what I had done in the pursuit.

Perhaps I was insufficiently brutalised as a page. Maybe if I’d been raped by one of the older pages – it happened all the time, as a punishment – I’d have been the sort of murderous bastard who likes a good rout.

But I looked at all those mothers, and I saw my own mother, I saw Nike . . .

Well. I went on killing men, so it didn’t change me for ever.

Alexander saw none of this. I know, because our first night in Athens, at Kineas’s father’s house, Cleitus the Black and I had a halting conversation about the mothers, and Alexander looked at both of us as if we were giggling girls.

‘War kills,’ he said. He shrugged. ‘Women weep. Men fight.’ He turned back to our host, Kineas’s father, Eumenes, and his admiration of Phokion.

The Athenians dedicated a statue to Philip. Demosthenes was exiled – not for ever, but for a while. We got to meet Isocrates, who somewhat sycophantically suggested that the whole Panhellenic crusade had been Philip’s notion and not his own – and his speeches in praise of Philip were deeply flattering. Alexander was made a citizen of Athens.

I spent evening after evening sitting with Eumenes. I missed my own father, and Eumenes was a good man – deeply conservative, well read, equally interested in Plato and in the breeding of dogs. He bore us no rancour – he was sure that fighting Macedon had been a mistake from the first.

Altogether, our reception in Athens was a masterpiece of diplomacy. There were people who hated and feared us – and no one tried to hide that from us. There were people who had always wanted our alliance. There were men like Kineas who wanted our alliance but had fought hard at Chaeronea to stop us.

Every day I learned more about democracy. Democracy isn’t a theory of government – it is a code of behaviour that allows a lower-class man to call me a murderer in the street, if he wants to. His neighbour may call me the saviour of Greece. They may share a cup of wine in a wine shop, still arguing.

Not like home. Interesting. It didn’t seem to work very well – but the dignity of the commons was amazing, vital and not like anything you’d see at home, where a twenty-year veteran of the king’s army would stand in the mud to let a thirteen-year-old aristocrat go by with his feet dry. That just didn’t happen in Athens.

Kineas and his friends were very much like us – we shared so many things that it was difficult, sometimes, to comprehend how deeply they were not like us. They had a respect for their commons – an acceptance of their power, their needs – that seemed at once weak and noble.

Athens had a great deal to offer, and I drank it in as I recovered from my loss. I had no duties, so I arranged to go to the theatre and to the assembly – sometimes with Eumenes, sometimes with Kineas, sometimes with Diodorus, who turned out to be the political member of Kineas’s band. He was an aristocrat – but politically he was a radical democrat and an enemy of Macedon.

‘You watch,’ he said one day over a cup of bad wine. ‘Your Philip is going to demand that Athens send soldiers to support his crusade in Persia. And they’ll send the Hippeis – we’re all oligarchs, to the mob. And I’ll spend my youth fighting for Philip.’ He laughed.

I laughed back. ‘And you’ll do it – because you respect the institution of voting.’

He shrugged. ‘I’d be a piss-poor democrat if I didn’t obey the will of the people. Even when it is wrong.’

Athens had other pleasures. I think I mentioned earlier that Aristotle tried to teach us to hold a symposium. Well, suddenly I was living in aristocratic Athens, and I was invited to a symposium virtually every night. For the first few weeks I passed. My heart was ashes, and somehow I couldn’t face the Athenians – as friends. So I sat at home with Eumenes.

But after my third visit to the theatre – the festival of Dionysus, the real thing, in Athens – Diodorus was going down to Piraeus to be with friends. It was like something from Socrates come to life. Too good to miss.

We walked down inside the long walls, and Diodorus pointed out how the walls were built in layers.

‘Athenians only spend money on defence when they are in a state of panic,’ he said with a nasty laugh. ‘Look at the base layer – see the column bases turned on their sides? Pure Parian marble – try to crack one of those with your catapults. That was from the year Plataea was fought, when Themistokles came back from Sparta and led us in building as fast as could be done. And atop it – mud brick, unbaked. That’s how it was finished.’ We walked along for a while. ‘Look here. Another course of marble laid down – and heavy stone atop it – the Thirty Years’ War. Niceas, or even Alcibiades. Look at the towers!’ He shrugged. ‘We do good work when we’re at our best. We’re at our best when we’re threatened, scared, angry.’

‘Like men,’ I said.

Diodorus glanced at me.

‘You aren’t what you seem at all, you know that?’ he said. ‘Kineas said you were . . . a thinker.’

‘Doesn’t exactly show on my face,’ I said. ‘It’s OK – I thought you were just an angry young man, all talk and no depth.’

And stuff like that. Making friends is the best way to pass time that there is – I had months in Athens, and I made friends that lasted me the rest of my life. Kineas, Diodorus, Demetrios of Phaleron . . .

But I get ahead of myself. We walked down the hill, talking about ethics and whether it was possible to have trust in a ruling class (my point) or acceptance of the stupid crap that the mob sometimes votes (his point) on faith. We agreed that either way, a lot of people were forced into acting on faith in other people’s choices.

We arrived at a beautiful house in Piraeus – Graccus’s house. He wasn’t as wealthy as Kineas’s father, and not as aristocratic – his father had built a fleet of merchantmen to trade with the Black Sea, and despite losses, they remained prosperous. But the house was a delight – pale stone and red tiles, a little above the street, and with a high central courtyard that had steps to a platform in the corner – so that on the platform, you could see the sea. We lay on couches watching the sun set. I had dined outside – what soldier has not? But I had seldom enjoyed it so much, a dinner of fresh-caught tuna and red snapper in parchment; deer meat in strips cooked on a brazier; bowls of spiced almonds in honey and little barley rolls. My mouth waters to recall it. And the wines – Nemeans and Chians, raisinated and clear and red, mixed with sparkling, bubbly water from some local shrine.

Graccus was a masterful host, with a good staff who loved him and worked to make us love him too.

I noted that Niceas, who was friends with my Polystratus and whom I treated as a sort of upper servant, shared Graccus’s couch. Later – after four or five bowls of wine – Niceas came and sat by me. He was a courteous man – he sat, but didn’t recline, until I indicated that he was welcome.

‘I’m not a servant, here,’ he said. He met my eye – we were only about a hand’s breadth apart. ‘I think you handle us well, Macedonian.’

‘Are you and Graccus lovers?’ I asked.

Niceas narrowed his eyes. ‘Not really your business, is it?’

I offer this by way of the thousands of things that showed me how free Athenians were – that this lower-class man could tell me to sod off, and then grin, slap my shoulder and go off to dance.