L. Meyer - Bloody Jack - Being an Account of the Curious Adventures of Mary Jacky Faber, Ship's Boy

There's shouts of "Man overboard," and bells ring and the ship comes about and men call out over the water, but nothin' is heard back. I pulls up me drawers and me pants as men are runnin' by me to the rail, and I hobbles over to the hatchway and dives down headfirst and gets out of sight fast. I'm hopin' nobody notices me in the confusion as I slides down a ladder and heads for me hidey-hole, shakin' all over.

The boats are put down in the rollin' sea and they rows around, but nothin'.

Nothin' but the dark and rollin' sea.

Maybe nobody saw. Maybe nobody heard. Maybe they'll think he was just drunk again and fell over the side in his drunkenness. Maybe nothin' will happen. Maybe.

I quivers in the dark for hours, huggin' me knees, and I thinks of Mary Townsend again and again and the rope across me throttle and the Bo'sun droppin' down on me shoulders to crush me throat and snap me neck, the same picture over and over and over till I'm whimperin' out loud, and then I hears the faint bells of the Four-to-Eight and I go up to stand my watch. I look over the side and I think of him down there, his blood leakin' out of him and his arms all out like he's flyin', but he ain't flyin', he's sinkin' down, down, and I'm thinkin' about him rollin' about in the dark depths of the black sea with his eyes open and starin', and I didn't do it I just wanted to get him off of me, and I didn't kill him I didn't kill him I didn't kill him. He drowned. He fell overboard. He drowned.

But that ain't the end of it, of course. The next morning blood is found on the deck near to where he went over, so all hands know it wasn't no accident. Sloat's friends swear the last thing they heard Sloat say as he went over was " Son of a bitch, " which was just what he called Liam Delaney the last time they tangled, and Delaney, the dog, said he'd kill poor Sloat and damned if 'e ain't done it! Right, and Delaney had the watch, too, so 'e 'ad plenty o' time t' do the rotten deed! The murdering Irish bastard!

So it ain't me they're gonna hang.

It's Liam.

Chapter 27

They've got Liam all tied up and it tears my heart to see him treated so, him what only had kind things to say to me and who taught me stuff and never asked for nothin'. He blinks in the sunlight as he's brought out of the brig and into the Captain's cabin, where the trial is bein' held. Liam's face is a mask of anger, but there's hopelessness there, too. He knows.

The trial drones on and on. There's two Marine sentries in dress uniforms all red and white outside the cabin, with their rifles held across their chests so that their bayonets cross in front of the door. The witnesses are called in and then come back out, satisfaction on the faces of Sloat's mates, despair on those of Liam's friends. The Captain and his officers talk on and on.

The men listening in at the cabin window shake their heads sadly.

It looks like it's over.

Liam to be hanged and I'm the cause. I'll have to beat the drum as he's hauled aloft, all twisting and ...

No. This cannot be.

I runs down the passageway and ducks under the bayonets and beats on the door.

"What the Hell?" from within and, "Stop there, you!" from the sentries. One grabs me by me neck.

The door opens and Mr. Haywood is standin' there, all outraged as he looks out over me head and finally down at me.

"What do you want, boy?" he thunders.

"Please, Sir, I got somethin' f say," and that's about the last clear thing I says as I plunges into the room and throws meself down in front of the Captain, who's standin' at the lectern and about to pronounce sentence on poor Liam.

"I was the one what did it, Sir," I wails, me hands up and prayin' and the tears gushin' out o' me eyes. "He was on me and he had his hand across me mouth so I couldn't call for help and he wouldn't get up and he's so heavy and he was kissin' me and I couldn't breathe and he pulled down me pants and put 'is hand on me and I was out o' me mind wi' the terror so I pulled out me shiv and I only wanted to poke 'im a little so's he'd get up and leave me alone but instead he jumps up and he's bleedin' and yellin' and then 'e goes over the side and I didn't mean it, Sir, I didn't but 'e was so heavy and awful and I didn't know what else to do, I didn't know what to do ... see, look ye here..."

I pulls me shiv out o' me vest and tosses it on the deck. Sloat's blood is still on it and it sickens me to see it.

"See, Sir, it warn't Liam, it was me and I'm sorry, Sir, I'm sorry."

And now the snot's runnin' out o' me nose and mixin' wi' the tears and runnin' in me mouth, and I can taste the tears and the snot in me mouth but I don't care. I'm just howlin' wi' fear and gaspin' wi' sobs and snortin' tears and snot all over the Captain's rug and I keeps on sayin', " Please, Sir, I couldn't stand the hangin wi' the Bo'sun jumpin on me shoulders and me neck all wrung. Couldn't ye just knock me on the head and put me over the side if ye have to... "

"Take him out of here!" roars the Captain, but I don't hear him 'cause I'm out o' me mind, and when hands are laid on me I thinks they're gonna take me right out and do me right then and I lets out a scream that's got all the horror and terror that's ever been in me, and I screams and screams...

But all they do is take me out and throw me in the brig till I calm down and they have a chance to talk over what I just told them. Liam's in there, too, but at least he's untied now and sittin' on the bunk.

"That was a brave, brave thing to do, comin' in there like that," he says. "I owe you my life, Jacky."

"I don't feel so very brave," says I, and I goes over and lies down and puts me head in his lap and falls into a dead sleep.

The Marines come and get me in the late afternoon. They tie my hands in front of me. "Sorry, boy, rules are rules," and they take me in the Captain's cabin, where all the officers are looking dreadful and stern, and they take me up and make me face the Captain at the lectern. He looks haggard and there are dark bags under his eyes.

"Faber, I swear, if you start that screeching again I'll take you out and hang you myself. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Good. Place your hands on the Bible. Do you swear to tell the truth, before Almighty God?"

I swears that I do.

"Now, where did all this take place?"

"In the starboard-side rope locker, Sir."

"And what were you doing in this rope locker?"

"Sleeping, Sir."

"And why were you sleeping in the rope locker instead of in your hammock?"

Deacon Dunne is sitting at a small table writing all this down.

"Because my mates don't like me anymore."

"And why don't your mates like you anymore?"

I hesitates a bit before answering. "They think I'm queer, Sir."

"And are you?"

"No, Sir."

"What do you mean by 'queer'?"

"They think I stirred up the trouble between Liam and Sloat when I didn't do nothin' to stir up nobody."

"You didn't lead Sloat on in any way?"

"No, Sir. He scared me. I tried to stay out of his way."

"All right. Now tell us what happened in the rope locker."

I tell them, this time without the howling and crying and groveling. When I am done, there is only the sound of Deacon Dunne's quill scratching.

"Very well, Faber, you may stand down. Sergeant, take him away."

I turn away from the lectern and the Marine leads me back to my cell. They untie my hands. This time I am alone in the brig. They have let Liam go. I am the only one on trial now.

I look up to the light from the small grating in the ceiling high overhead. The grating lets out into the hold above and allows in a little light and air. I've seen a lot of things in my life, but this is the first time I've seen bars between me and the world.