Michelle Styles - The Gladiator's Honor

'You're a dark horse, Julia. Perhaps that augur wasn't entirely mad after all. Perhaps he was right. The signs for a betrothal with Mettalius, who has had close links to Lucius in the Senate, are not good. We may have had a lucky escape. Restored from death could mean many things. Didn't Sulla sentence many senators to death? Or perhaps an elderly man whose doctor's had all but given up hope…'

'Who am I to question the whims of the gods?' Julia pursed her lips and silently vowed she'd find a way to bribe the augur before she consented to marriage to someone older than her father. Valens restored to the place she knew he belonged was what she wanted.

'Quite, and now we need to develop a plan…'

The great oak door swung open and Valens entered. Her eyes devoured him and traced the line of his shoulders. She noticed small things. The way a small drop of water clung to the base of his throat. The way his hair gleamed with the faint sheen of the freshly washed and his tunic swung, revealing a bit more of his muscular legs than it should. Julia's breath caught in her throat. She tightened her hold on the scrolls and attempted to appear nonchalant, but her mind raced. She had to discover more about his past. She had seen his face on a statue somewhere. She simply need to discover where.

When he reached the fountain, Valens stopped, listening. Then he turned towards them, a smile playing on his lips. Julia sat paralysed. How to begin with Sabina next to her?

'Excuse me, ladies, but you look so comfortable sitting in the sun, would you mind if I joined you?' Without waiting for an answer, he sat down beside Julia, leant back, with the sun on his face and closed his eyes. His eyelashes made dark smudges on his tanned cheeks.

Sabina made little shooing motions. 'Julia, there are things we need to do. Things we have been discussing.'

'As soon as I have finished this poem.' Julia fought to keep her voice steady. How could she bring the conversation around to his boyhood? Maybe if she did, she'd be able to convince him to go and make peace with his family.

'Which poem?' Sabina's voice was sharp with suspicion. 'You are reading something appropriate, aren't you, Julia? Something sensible rather than the rubbish you normally read.'

"The one I was reading when you interrupted me. Senator Gracchus recommended it to me,' she finished with sudden inspiration. She felt Valens's leg tense against hers as if the name disturbed him. But it happened so briefly, Julia dismissed the idea.

'If the senator recommended it…' Sabina said, and stood up. She straightened her stola , and stalked off. Julia could hear her voice screech several orders at the servants.

Julia waited until Sabina's voice had died away before she risked a proper look at Valens. He had not moved since he closed his eyes. Julia watched his chest as he took deep steady breaths, a lock of black hair falling down over his right eye. All her ideas deserted her. She opened her mouth and closed it again. Very quietly, she began to roll up the scrolls, fastening each one with a bit of cord. When she had finished, and he had still made no sound or move, she started to stand up.

His hand caught hers, lacing her fingers with his. 'Stay, please stay.'

'Sabina will be back shortly,' Julia explained, but his fingers remained closed around hers. Julia swallowed hard and her heart thumped in her ears. Her heart demanded she press her face close to his, touch his lips with her, regardless of who might see. She had to hang on to her sense of propriety. Things were too finely balanced to risk her father's wrath. She had had a reprieve this morning, but there was no telling for how long. 'We will have barely any time to talk.'

She withdrew her hands and placed them primly on her lap. The skirt of her gown brushed his bare calf. She reached down and smoothed it away, but her hand felt the heat of his leg.

'Shall we talk about poetry—unless you want to tell me about your day?' he asked, breaking the silence. 'Are you to be betrothed to Mettalius?'

'The augur did not approve. The omens had changed.'

'Did he say anything else?'

'You know how priests are.' Julia gave a little wave of her hand. She had to get the subject away from this morning and towards Valens's boyhood without him realising why. She did not dare take the risk that he might stop her. After all, he had not contacted his family before now. 'They enjoy speaking in riddles. Do you find them helpful?'

A smile tugged at the side of his mouth. 'At times, they have their uses. But you must be careful. One told my father I was destined for great things.'

Julia's body tensed. He was doing it without her prompting. He was speaking of his childhood. 'Was the augur correct?'

'Not in the way my father hoped.' Valens folded his hands behind his head. 'But in my own way, perhaps he was right. I, Valens the Thracian, have achieved greatness.'

Back to gladiators. Julia bit her lip. She wanted to hear about before, not now. She had to try one more time. 'But are you worried about disappointing your father?'

'Julia, my past no longer concerns me. I live only for the present' The planes of his face were shadowed. 'Shall we discuss something more agreeable. Poetry, perhaps?'

He reached towards the scroll she had been reading and unwrapped it. His smile faded slightly and Julia wondered if somehow she had hurt him. Could he read Greek?

'You are going through a Sappho stage,' he said with a small quirked smile. 'I liked her just before I reached my manhood, but I thought her a bit Hsqui for a properly brought-up young woman. My tutor once said she was primarily read by people who had recently discovered sex and enjoyed it.'

Julia laughed, a high-pitched laugh of relief. They could talk about poetry for a while, then, when the time was right, she'd try again. 'Lucius always refused to let me read her and he can no longer forbid me.'

'An act of rebellion?' Valens raised an eyebrow.

'If you like, but I wanted to be able to make up my own mind about her. I was tired of Lucius's dictates.' Julia shifted uncomfortably. He made it seem as if she only liked Sappho out of spite. She enjoyed the cadence and the rhythm. 'I tried reading her and found that I liked her use of imagery. Have you read any of her work?'

'You need not look so surprised. I did have a traditional Roman education. To study philosophy properly one must know how to read Greek. My father despaired of my liking for poetry. He felt it frivolous compared to speeches of the great orators and generals. Carthage must be destroyed and all that' His eyes bore into her soul and Julia dropped her gaze. She hardly dare breathe. Might this be the way? 'Is there something wrong with a gladiator who reads?'

Julia felt her cheeks flush. Anything she said would be misinterpreted.

'Oh, I see you fell for my physical rather than mental charms.' A dimple showed in the corner of his mouth. He handed her back the scroll with a glint of regret in his eyes. 'You need not be ashamed. It is why most women support the games.'

'I think perhaps I had best go.' Julia stood up. This was all wrong. Any explanation she gave now would be wrong. How could she explain when he now thought she was like the other women supporters? 'I confused the situation.'

Valens's hand shot out, keeping her there, imprisoning her in its grasp. She pulled gently and he released her. 'I asked you to stay.'

'You want to make speeches. You should be in the Senate, not in the arena.' Julia put her hand over her mouth. Why could she never think, then speak?

'I wanted to discuss your reading with you, and to learn more about you.' His voice was low but firm. 'I thought you wanted more than a pretty face.'

Julia stared at her hands. Her mind raced. She was making a complete muddle of this. 'Stop distorting what I said. I just had never considered it.' She tilted her head and peeped at him through her lashes. 'You will have to admit, you were not spouting poetry yesterday.'