Radclyffe: Honor Reclaimed

"I know. It's a million to one chance that it will ever happen again." Blair snuggled against Cam's chest, wanting nothing except to be in her arms. "Don't ever play poker for money, darling."

*

Diane was waiting for Blair when she came out of the bedroom after situating Cam for the night. "Well? What the hell happened? Where is Stark?"

"We left her in Virginia for the time being. Renee is going to be in the hospital for a couple of days so they can make sure her leg is okay. Paula wanted to come back with us, but I wouldn't let her."

"Is Renee going to be all right?"

"Yes. The surgeon said nothing vital was injured, and her recovery should be pretty fast."

"Thank God." Diane took Blair's hand and led her into the kitchen. "Sit. I bet you haven't had anything to eat all day, have you?"

Blair sagged into the chair without protest and brushed her hair back with trembling hands. "God, what a nightmare this day has been. I don't think I can eat."

"Well, you're going to. Scrambled eggs with cheese and toast. Comfort food, and it will get some protein into you." As she removed items from the refrigerator, she asked, "Do you know what happened?"

"Cam can't tell me, and none of the medical personnel seem to know. I'll call Lucinda tomorrow," Blair said. "But right now, I really don't care."

Diane put the bowl of eggs aside and went to Blair. She leaned down and hugged her. "Neither do I. At least they're all in one piece."

Blair laughed unsteadily and rested her cheek against Diane's body, welcoming the comfort. "More or less."

"I don't suppose you heard anything about Valerie," Diane said softly.

Blair shook her head. "I don't know anything, sweetie. As soon as I do, I promise I'll let you know."

Diane kissed Blair's forehead. "Thanks."

"I did some thinking on the trip back here," Blair said. "I'm going to talk to Tanner about buying this place. I think it will be good for us to get away somewhere truly safe. Tanner should be able to arrange the sale so that no one can trace us, at least not without a lot of trouble. I'm not even going to tell my father where we are when we come here."

"I think that's a great idea. As long as that guesthouse has my name on it."

Blair smiled. "Definitely."

"Perfect. Now, about those eggs..."

To Blair's surprise, she discovered she was hungry, and after finishing the quick meal, she made her excuses and returned to the bedroom. She'd left the bedside light on, turned down low, and she could see from the doorway that Cam's eyes were closed. As quietly as she could, she started toward the bathroom, but stopped when Cam opened her eyes. She changed direction and settled onto the side of the bed, leaning forward with her arm on the other side of Cam's body. "Hey. You're supposed to be trying to sleep."

Cam patted the bed beside her.

"You want company?"

Cam nodded and grinned, stronger this time. She drew one finger along the strong line of Blair's jaw, then brushed her thumb over Blair's mouth. Blair smiled.

"Commander, don't even think about it." She stood, shed her clothes, and slid beneath the sheets. Gently, she eased an arm behind Cam's back. "Can you lean with your head on my shoulder without hurting your neck?"

Carefully, Cam shifted onto her side and settled against the curve of Blair's body. With a sigh, she closed her eyes. Blair held her, wide awake. She didn't want to sleep, she wanted to—needed to—feel Cam beside her. She thought of her conversation with Diane.

"Does it ever begin to make sense? "

"Once in a while, when you feel her next to you, and you know that that's the only thing in the world that truly matters."

Chapter Thirty-three

Monday, October 1

S avard heard the sound of footsteps on the deck and watched the door with a combination of anticipation and uncertainty. She'd awakened alone after arriving at Whitley Point late the night before, having cajoled and badgered the medical staff into allowing her to leave the hospital twenty-four hours early. Paula had slept in a chair by her bed and had risen early to check in with the commander. She wanted Paula's company, her comfort, but at the same time, she wanted to be alone. She needed time to find a place for the anger and terrible disappointment that had plagued her since 9/11, and she didn't want to inflict her doubts and disillusionment on her lover.

"I've got coffee and scones," Stark said as she edged through the doorway with a tray. "Hungry?"

"Yes." Savard smiled. She couldn't help it.

Stark appraised the position of Renee's leg, propped up on several pillows on the sofa. "How are you feeling?"

"It doesn't hurt much at all. Just a big old cut is all it turned out to be. If it hadn't been for the temporary shock to the nerves, I probably would've been able to walk on my own." She grimaced, still embarrassed that she'd put the commander's life in danger.

"You couldn't help getting shot, honey." Stark poured coffee and placed a blueberry scone on a paper napkin. She set them both on the end table within Renee's reach.

"I nearly blew the whole thing. Big time."

Carefully, Stark settled onto the sofa and laid her hand on Renee's thigh.

"But you didn't, did you."

Savard looked down at the strong hand. Paula loved her. Paula also was one of the few people in her life who could really understand what it meant to struggle against an evil so pervasive that the fight felt endless. Paula would understand that sometimes she just wanted to give up, to give in, to say it was all too much and to walk away. To have a normal life, where it was still possible to believe that the world was safe. She sighed and traced the tendons and veins on the top of Paula's hand with her fingertip. "It was close, for a while. I wasn't certain we were going to make it." She looked into Paula's concerned brown eyes. "For a while now, I haven't been sure I would make it."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Stark asked gently.

"No." Savard kissed Paula softly, knowing that the love this woman offered her was the one safe place in her world. "But I will."

And as she told her everything, she felt the first stirrings of peace.

*

Blair watched Stark disappear into the guesthouse and turned to smile at Cam, who sat at the table. "Between Savard on crutches and you barely able to manage a whisper, I feel like we're running a rehab center around here."

Cam grinned.

"Don't talk," Blair warned, joining her at the table. She sat down and reached for Cam's hand. "I'm going to talk, and you're going to nod. Okay?"

"Yes," Cam whispered.

"Cameron, don't push. I've been going easy on you because you were hurt." Blair's eyes flashed. "But I haven't forgotten that you said you'd stay with the rear action, and you ended up practically getting yourself blown up."

"No—"

Blair held up a hand, cutting her off. "I didn't say anything to you yesterday because you needed to rest, but I spoke with Lucinda. I got some of the details."

Cam frowned.

"Oh, I know. You would have preferred to tell me yourself, so that you could downplay the danger. I know how you operate." Blair reached for Cam's hand and held it. "They put up more resistance than anybody figured, didn't they?" When Cam nodded, a frustrated expression on her face, Blair continued, hoping to fill in the blanks so that Cam wouldn't need to speak. She knew that Cam probably needed to talk about it almost as much as she needed to hear it, even though Cam wouldn't want to share all the details. Well, she'd just have to. "And that's how you ended up right in the middle of things. There was no rear action." She lifted Cam's hand and rubbed it against her cheek. "You wouldn't have put yourself in danger like that unless you had to, right?"