Radclyffe: Love's Melody Lost

Graham drew a shaky breath, struggling for composure. Suddenly, with horrifying clarity, Anna realized that Graham Yardley was blind. That realization brought a flood of sympathy, and she said without thinking, "Oh God, Im so sorry. I didnt know!"

"How could you know," Graham rejoined roughly, reaching behind her with one hand to find the armchair. She lowered herself slowly, her expression betraying none of her discomfiture. She would not be humiliated further by enduring empty condolences. "There is no need to dwell on it. Be seated."

Helen came quickly to her side, watching Graham with concern. She extended a hand as if to touch her, then quickly drew back. "Ive put the tea in its usual place. Will you need anything else?"

"No. Leave us."

As Helen stepped away, Graham held up her hand, her voice softening. "Its fine, Helen. You neednt worry. On second thought, could you bring us some sherry?"

As she spoke, Anna could see her host relax with effort against the cushions. Her face lost its edge as well, reflecting the sudden gentleness of her tone. Anna found her expressive features captivatingas well as quite beautiful.

Helen smiled tenderly. "Ill get it right away."

They sat in silence as Helen brought glasses and poured the sherry. She handed Anna a glass and left Grahams on the small table near her right hand. The silence continued for a few moments after the housekeeper pulled the heavy library doors closed behind her. When Graham reached for the glass and raised it to her lips, her hand was steady again.

"Forgive me," she began in her deep mellifluous voice, "I havent asked if your accommodations are suitable."

"The rooms are wonderful," Anna replied "The view of the sea is exquisite." Instantly she regretted her remark, but Graham merely nodded, a distant look on her face.

"I know. I always stayed in that room when I was a child."

Anna willed herself to be calm, and tasted the sherry. It felt warm and comforting as she swallowed. She couldnt stop staring at the woman across from her. Her mere physical presence was imposing - defined less by gender than by the pure elements of beauty and elegance, much as a classical sculpture is often androgynous at first glance. She was aristocratic, her every movement refined. She was scrupulously polite, and obviously used to being in charge. She was aloof, remote, unapproachable. She was more than a little intimidating!

"Did Mr. Norcross explain what your duties are to be?" Graham continued, unaware of Annas discomfort.

"Not in detail. Im afraid I may not be what youre looking for. I have no experience managing a household."

"Really?" Graham remarked dryly, raising an eyebrow. "Mr. Norcross led me to believe that you had been married and now live independently. That sounds as if you have managed at least two."

Anna laughed. "Neither was much of a challenge. Can you tell me what it is that you require?"

Graham sighed slightly, turning toward the fire. In profile signs of fatigue lined her face, and Anna caught glimpses of gray streaking her dark hair. Anna guessed her to be ten years her senior, but despite her commanding tone and rigid control, Anna sensed a weariness that had nothing to do with the years.

"I needassistancewith handling correspondence, reviewing accounts, running the day-to-day affairs of the estate. Helen cannot handle all of this any longer, and Icannot do it alone. I have never had anyone else do it, and I dont want Helen to think that Ive lost confidence in her. It has simply become too much. You would also have to do some rather menial chores, Im afraid. Helen no longer drives, and it is difficult getting deliveries out here." She stopped, making an impatient gesture with one graceful hand. "We need someone at Yardley, it seems, who can manage in the world beyond our gates."

Her tone was bitter, and Anna could only imagine how hard it must be for a woman of such obvious independence to admit she needed a stranger to assist her.

"Ms. Yardley" she began.

"Please, call me Graham," Graham interrupted, "otherwise I will feel truly a relic." She smiled slightly, and Anna caught a fleeting glimpse of her haunting beauty. When she allowed her feelings expression, she was even more intriguing.

"GrahamI am in something of a desperate situation myself. I want to continue in graduate school full-time. Without this job, I wont be able to afford to do thatnot and keep a roof over my head, too. Im afraid Ill need some help, but I would like to try this very much." She meant every word, and her sincerity showed in her voice. She didnt add how drawn she was to Yardley the moment she saw it, or how right it felt to be here. She couldnt admit even to herself how much the woman before her captured her imagination, and her curiosity. She very much wanted to learn more of Yardley, and its compelling master.

Graham ran a hand through her hair, leaving it tousled, and sighed again.

"It seems we are both in need of some assistance, then. Shall we agree to try it for a month or two?"

Anna smiled in relief. "Id like that very much."

Graham rose, crossing to the door with deliberate steps. "Ill send for you when I need you. Good evening."

With that she was gone, her footsteps echoing in the quiet house. Anna glanced up at the portrait, wishing it could tell her who Graham Yardley was.

Chapter Three

Anna awoke very early the next day, as much from excitement as from the strangeness of a new house. It would take a little time to get used to the night noises of the old structure, the rhythmic pounding of the surf, and the absence of city traffic below her window. The quiet seclusion of Yardley Manor had truly transported her to a new world. After Helen retired to her rooms the previous evening, Anna stayed up reading in her sitting room. She must have dozed for it was quite late when she was startled awake by a noise outside in the hall. She listened intently for a few moments, thinking she heard footsteps pause before her door. But then there was only the gentle creak of the shutters in the wind. Smiling to herself, she got ready for bed. As she lay awake, waiting for sleep to come, she mused over her first meeting with her new employer. Rarely had anyone caught her attention quite so dramatically. Graham Yardley was impossible to describe in ordinary terms. Anna was quite sure she had never met anyone like her. As she drifted off to sleep, the image of the dark-haired aristocrat lingered in her mind.

Shaking herself to dispel the last vestiges of sleep, Anna pushed back the heavy comforter and reached for a tee shirt. She moved quickly across the chilly room to the window, anxious for her first glimpse of Yardley in the morning. Looking down across the lawns, she was surprised to see a figure at the edge of the bluff, facing out toward the ocean. She recognized instantly the tall, slender figure of Graham Yardley. As the sun rose, it struck her face, outlining her chiseled profile in stark relief against the sky. Standing so still, her hair windblown, one hand clasping the ebony walking stick, she appeared hauntingly alone.

As Graham began to make her way carefully up the steep slope to the house, Anna stepped back from the window. She didnt want her employer to see her watching. Almost instantaneously she remembered that Graham could not see her. The fact of Grahams blindness saddened her deeply. She wondered why that should be, since she scarcely knew her. Perhaps it was the poorly concealed pain in her voice or the fierce pride beneath the tightly controlled surface. But more than that, Anna was moved by Grahams apparent isolation from the world. To Anna, that was the greatest tragedy of all. Anna experienced life as a feast for all the senses. It was that love of life that drew her to the miracle of growing things and motivated her desire to design living spaces where people could exist in harmony with nature. The environment was the canvas of Annas dreams. It troubled her unaccountably to think that Graham Yardley had withdrawn from that. Anna looked down into the ruins of the Yardley estate, imagining the beauty that once existed there, and she longed to know it as it had once beenflowering with new growth, rich with the pageantry of life.