Nick Stephenson - Eight the Hard Way

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Divide and Conquer

By Kay Hadashi

After a U-turn in the dead end street, a car parked at the curb with the wheels angled out. Three men quietly sat inside until a luxury sedan parked at a house down the block. They watched the driver intently as she unbuckled two little girls’ seat belts.

“Nice car,” the driver said.

“Nice ass,” said the large man seated in the back seat.

“And we’re not here for either one,” said the front passenger.

They watched as the woman disabled the home alarm system and led the little girls into the house, kicking the door closed behind them.

“I keep telling you, we should get that alarm code,” said the man slouched in the back seat. He was the biggest, uncomfortably packed into the small car.

“It’ll be fine,” the front seat passenger said back authoritatively. “With any luck, the alarm system will be turned off. If not, we go to Plan B.”

“Which is kick in the door and rush them,” the driver offered, grinning.

“And we want to avoid that at all costs,” replied the front seat passenger, the man in charge. “Everything calm and relaxed. We need to keep those little brats quiet.”

“Smack ‘em if they cry. That’ll shut them up,” said the man in back. “The woman too.”

“Shut up, idiot. Try to remember these women ain’t stupid. And the last thing we need is some woman freakin’ out.”

“Who are they again?” the driver asked.

“The one that just went in is some classy fashion model. Owns a clothing company also. She’s the one with money.”

The driver snorted a laugh. “Fashion model? How bright can she be?”

“She didn’t get rich by being dumb. And the sister is some sort of doctor. She won’t be dumb either.”

“A lady doctor? Book smart but not street wise.”

An old brown Toyota parking in the driveway got their attention.

“That’s the sister, the brats’ aunt. She’s the one that lives there. The mom’s the one with the money.”

“She’s a doctor? And she drives that old piece of junk? I’m telling you, neither of ‘ems too bright. This is gonna be easy,” the man in the back seat said, rubbing his hands on his pants.

The one in charge finally heard enough. “And I’m telling both of you to keep your word holes clamped.”

The woman slammed the car door shut and went into the house with a grocery bag.

“How’d you hear about these babes again?” asked the driver.

“Look, I got from a reliable source that the mother is going out of town this weekend and is leaving the kids with the sister,” the one in charge explained. “She has a big house in Orange County and just got a home safe installed, stuffed full of cash.”

“If the cash is there, why are we here?” Neat and tidy, the driver was the slimmest of the three.

The one in charge explained the plan again. “It’s a surprise job, just like we talked. We knock on the door, rush the sister and tie her up. Ignore the kids, but just don’t let them run off. I don’t want any of that female hysterical shit. Then we call the mother and demand the combo to the safe.”

The one in the back seat stuck a cigarette in his mouth and was about to light it.

“Hey!” said the man in front, looking back at him. “What’d I tell you about smokin’? No real names, no food, and no butts till the job is done. Take everything out of your pockets except what we need. No evidence. And I’ll do all the talking.”

The cigarette was reluctantly put away.

“Where’d you hear about the safe?” the driver asked.

“A dude I know monitors alarm calls at a security company. On the side, he sells customer info for pocket money.”

“Not a bad gig, as long as someone doesn’t finger him.”

“How’d he hear about the money in the safe?” the driver asked.

“He gets bulletins for security changes.” He looked at the driver. “Nevermind. That’s my problem. You just worry about driving. After we get the safe combo, you and I go to the house. On the way, I’ll call the guy to shut down the home security system for a few minutes so we can get in.” He looked at the guy in the back seat. “You wait behind with the aunt and kids.”

The driver squirmed in his seat. “Yeah, but once we get the combination, why wouldn’t the mother just call the cops? They could be waiting at the house for us.”

“Cause she wants her two little brats back again, safe and sound.”

“How do you know there’s money in the safe if it was just installed?” the driver argued.

“That was in the bulletin my buddy got. An armored car delivery was made to her address one day last week.”

“And if she had only a few hundred clams in there, she’d bring it home herself,” the driver mumbled. “But an armored car would bring a whole lot more than that, right?”

“Exactly.”

They watched the mother leave the house alone and drive off.

“You’re right. She left the kids with the sister.”

The leader of the operation opened a shopping bag and handed something to each of them. Each had a rubber Halloween mask to wear with images of past Presidents.

“What’s this?” the big guy in the back seat asked.

“We’re wearing masks. You’re Clinton.”

“Ah, come on!” the man complained.

“Yeah, well, I got George Bush,” the driver said, holding the mask up for inspection. He looked at the man in the passenger seat. “What’re you wearing?”

“Reagan. I voted for him twice, so I figured, why not?”

After going through the plan one more time, they put on their masks and checked their pockets for everything they would need.

June took a small grocery bag to the kitchen as soon as she was inside her front door. Her sister Amy had the kids at the dinner table with juice boxes.

“Done with rounds at the hospital?” Amy asked from her supervisory position standing over her twin four-year-olds.

“Sorry. Ran a little late,” June said, looking at her sister for the first time. “Is that your latest business suit concept?”

“I’m not sure I like it. Might not make it into the winter catalogue.” Amy tugged at a lapel and straightened a cuff on her business suit. She looked under the table at an active pair of legs. “Ruka, stop kicking Koemi.”

As she prepared to leave, Amy warned her daughters to behave at auntie’s house.

“Where are you staying this weekend?” asked June as Amy grabbed her purse.

Amy waved June away from the kids to talk in private.

“Look, I’ll be at home if anything should come up,” she whispered. “But I’ll have a guest, if you know what I mean.”

“Someone new?”

Amy glanced at her daughters playing with empty juice boxes. “Nevermind about that.”

June grinned. “Yeah, we’ll catch up later.”

Amy went to the desk in the corner of the living room. “I got a new phone, and a new number. Too many creeps these days. Major pain in the neck to change contact numbers, too. Which means I have to change them one at a time.” Amy scrawled her new number on a note pad at the desk and tossed down the pencil. “The kids know it already, but make them practice a few times. And as always...”