Brian Jacques - Redwall #06 - The Outcast of Redwall

“As Badger Lord of Salamandastron, I appoint you, Blogg-wood, new Head Cook in my kitchens. The rest of youwill you help our friend to produce good and tasty meals? Ladles and aprons were hurled high in the air, and the help and assistants cheered aloud. The former Head Cook stood in front of Sunflash, hatless, bewildered by the sudden turn of events. “But what about me? Whatll I do? he cried.

Sunflash threw a friendly paw about his shoulder, saying, “Well, youve never liked cooking, have you?

“Of course not, but its a job. Somebeasts got to do it.

“Right, but you didnt like doing it, so you dont have to it any longer. What dyou really like doing, friend? “Well, er, Ive always been interested in brewing ales, cor-, and wine. Here, would you like to try some of my cow-wine, Sire?

The hare opened a cupboard and pulled out a flagon and beakers.

Sunflash watched him pour two beakers full, and said, y not, Ill try anything once. He sipped, and rolled his eyes appreciatively. “This is excellent! Can you make fizzy strawberry cordial for little ones?

The hare winked, and snorted, “Can I make fizzy strawberry cordial? Listen, matey, er, Sire, I can make it so fizzy itd curl your fur!

Sunflash shook him heartily by the paw. “Well said! Go and see our cellarkeeper and tell him his workload is halved, because Ive just appointed you joint Chief Cellarkeeper and Winemaker Brewer of Salamandastron!

As Sunflash and Bloggwood produced a tasty giant turnover of leek, carrot, mushroom, and dark gravy between them, word got around. Hares came filing into the kitchens with requests and observations, knowing the new Badger Lord would give them a fair and good hearing. He did!

Within the space of half a morning, Sunflash the Mace had appointed an assistant cellarbeast, two flower gardeners, a new sick bay assistant, a carpenter, banquet arranger, and a whole host of young ones who wanted to be armorers and forge assistants to the Badger Lord.

Later, Sundew sat with Bloggwood and some others, as they helped themselves to an impromptu lunch of the big turnover, which had been named a Bloggflash Special.

The badger put aside two slices, rich, dark gravy seeping from them onto the plates as he popped them in the oven.

“Keep an eye on them slices, Sundew, he said. “Theyll do for Starbuck and Breezes supper tonight. The old unsll enjoy my turnover.

Sundew wiggled her ears in admiration of the Badger Lord. “Well, well, Sire, youve certainly made some jolly old changes round here. Id say youre doin a spiffin job, wot!

Sunflash shoved her lightly, almost sending her sprawling. “You can stop wiggling your ears at me, missiebesides, youll have to show a little more dignity now mat Ive decided to appoint you as my confidential aide.

Skipping and laughing. Sundew almost collided with Forty, who was holding up a chubby paw for Sunflashs attention.

“I say, old Sire, can I be official food taster? Id be jolly good at that I think.

Sunflash roared, laughing until he had to hold his sides. At suppertime, Sunflash and Sundew took the turnover slices up to the sick bay, only to find Dewfleck, a quiet older hare whom Sunflash had appointed as sick-bay assistant that morning, sitting weeping on the top stair. Her face was buried in her paws as her whole body shook fitfully.

Sadly the badger set down the two plates and sat on the stairs next to her. “Its Breeze and Starbuck, isnt it? he asked.

She nodded, sobbing brokenly. “Oh, Sire, they was oldin paws, just lyin there all peaceful like. I thought they were avin a little doze, but ole Breeze an Starbuck, they was ... Boohoohoohoo!

Sunflash dried her eyes with the corner of a kitchen apron he had been wearing all day. “There, there, hush now, those old uns were looking forward to meeting their friends in the Dark Forest, they told me that only this morning. Isnt that right, Sundew?

The young hare sniffed as she wiped her eyes against the apron. “Absolutely, Sire. Theyll never have tface a rotten ol winter again; theyre both happy now, along with your grandsire.

Throughout that long winter the hares of Salamandastron came to know and love their new Lord. Sunflash was all things to them: friend to the old, counselor to the young, and playmate to the babes, who were his constant delight. He looked forward eagerly to the spring, when he planned to take up farming once more. Often on dreary winter afternoons the forge room was alive with helpers as Sunflash and his blacksmiths turned out spades, hoes, rakes, and trowels, in readiness for the coming seasons planting and cultivation. The badger had almost forgotten about his foebeast, Swartt Sixclaw, and would not think of him until the arrival of Skarlath in the early spring.

23

The vermin horde found the path broad, smooth, and easy to march on, and good progress was made on the first day traveling south. That evening, they camped in an untidy sprawl, right across the path and on both sides of it. Tender young shoots and new green foliage, which would have been shunned as food any other time, were welcomed after their winter starvation.

Next day blustered in bright and breezy, lightly warm with random fleece clouds scurrying across spring skies. Swartt was in a good mood, pleased with the ground he had covered the previous day. Muggra the weasel Captain was still out in front of the army, dragging himself painfully along on all fours, his injured footpaw causing him great pain.

Pitilessly, Swartt marched hard behind Muggra, watching him crawl as he spoke to him in a cruel voice of mock reason..See now, friend, you couldve been marchin upright an brisk like the rest of us if you adnt chosen to argue wid me. Come on now, dont go sulkin an mopin, apologize tme like a goodbeast an ask me fer mercy. He kicked the Captain, sending him sprawling on the road.

Muggra spat earth as he whimpered, “Mercy, Lord, I was wrong to argue with yer!

Swartt laughed harshly, stepping on Muggras back as he passed him. “Get out o me sight, ysnivellin1 craven, an1 thank yer lucky stars Im in a good mood tday!

Sss.sssthunk!

A javelin came streaking out of the blue and buried itself deep in the path, in front of the Warlord. It stood quivering as the ferret fell back and seized Nightshades paw. “Where in the name o blisterin blazes did that come from? he cried.

The vixen tried desperately to extricate her paw from the ferrets viselike grasp. “I dont know, Lord, but it looks to me like some sort of warning that we should go no farther!

Swartt held on to the paw, glaring at her. “Tell me true, fox. Did you ave any visions or dreams about this?

Nightshade wrenched her crushed paw away, shaking her head. “None, Sire, I saw nothing!

Tugging the javelin loose, Swartt broke it across his mailed paw. “One javelin aint goin tstop this horde. Forward march!

The Warlord stood still, allowing the marchers to walk past him. Screams rang out as the foremost three vermin fell, two pierced by arrows, the other felled by a hefty rock. Suddenly the horde was in disarray.

“Theyre in the woods on the east side! Swartt roared. “Scraw, charge em with spears, wipe every last one of em out! Aggat, Nightshade, line some archers up, herejump to it!

Redfarl watched the spearbeasts charge into the woodlands, letting them get sufficiently far from the path before nodding to a score of squirrels perched in the treetops. Half of the vermin were cut down by a hail of arrows, the rest, turning to run back, were set upon by otters whirling heavy loaded slings, which they used as clubs. As quickly as they struck, the attackers faded into the woodland.

On the path all Swartt heard was a few distant screams, then silence. He held up a warning paw, saying, “Stretch those bowstrings; be ready; keep yer eyes peeled on them woodlands!