Brian Jacques - Redwall #16 - Triss

As Sagax mounted the steps to the greenstone exit, a shrew voice challenged him gruffly: Who goes there? Show yoreself!

The four Guosim guards they had left behind were in a sorry state. One lay dead, two were unconscious and the remaining shrew was wounded, though not badly. He pointed west into the woodlands.

Three of ‘em, Chief, the white ‘un an’ two rats. They pretended they was surrenderin’ an’ tricked us. Let me go with ye.

Log a Log applied a hasty bandage of dockleaves and grass to his clanbeast’s injured side and made him comfortable. You stay ‘ere an’

do wot ye can for yore mates. You’d only slow us down. Don’t fret, well get ‘em for ye!

Riggan halted on the bank of a small, shady lake and sat down gratefully.

This’ll do, we’ll rest ‘til nightfall. Then if’n you still want t’go back for that pawring, things should be quieter at that Brock’all place, marm. That’s if’n ye want t’go, of course.

Kurda was polishing the crown with some dried moss. She breathed on it and rubbed busily, admiring the way the light caught the heavy gold circlet with its two large jetstones. The Pure Ferret paused and glared regally at her slavecatcher. Dere is no question, I must return to dat place und find mine pawring. Vorto, go und get somet’ink for your queen to eat. I am hungry!

Saluting with his spear, the Ratguard Captain obeyed. Riggan, the more forward of the two, commented drily, So ye ain’t a princess no more, marmÑ’tis Queen now, eh?

Kurda drew her sabre. Sliding the crown over its blade, she held them both out to Riggan. I am Queen by right und conquest. If you vant to be Queen, all you haff to do is lift der crown from dis sabre blade.

Riggan chuckled nervously, knowing what would happen the second she reached out to touch the crown. Wot gave ye the idea I want t’be Queen, marm? My duty is to serve you an’ yore father, Agarnu. Er, wot about

‘im?

Kurda’s eyes narrowed, and she giggled like a naughty infant. Dat von-legged fool? I giff him der same offer I make to you, mine friend.

Yarr, I vill be Queen of all Rift-gard!

Vorto came stealing furtively back to the lake bank.

Kurda gave him a questioning look. Vere is der food I send you for?

The Ratguard Captain placed a paw to his lips. Not so loud, yore ‘ighness, I just seen somethin’. D’yer remember that big rabbit at Redwall Abbey, the one who snared our guards in a net an’ whacked ‘em? I saw ‘im by chance out in the woodlands, but ‘e didn’t see me, ane’s comin’ this way!

Kurda’s face was the picture of smug self-satisfaction. I remember dat von. Hide now, ve vill ambush ‘im!

40

Scarum was lost. Between stopping to eat, napping, and composing heroic ballads about himself, the young hare had wandered willy-nilly through Mossflower and missed all trace of his friends. But he was not unduly bothered; anything was better than skivvying at Redwall on a restricted diet. He rambled on, holding a lively conversation with himself.

Lost? Oh come off it, old sport, a chap of my perfect qualities is never lost, wot! I’ll wager anythin’ that pretty soon I’ll hear Sagax shoutin’

it’s time for lunch. Huh, that stripeheaded baritone pal o’ mine has a voice like a bloomin’ bushel o’ bullfrogs, lets the whole world know when he’s hungry. Not like me, of course, the tiniest whisper is all I jolly well give when it’s time for the old nosebag. Not one to yell about scoff, never was!

He caught sight of the pond with a loud whoop. What ho! Fresh clean cool water, just the thing for a growin’ hare. Hope there’s some o’

those flippin’ tasty little watershrimp whizzin’ about in there, wot wot?

Scarum crouched in the shallows, making the most outrageous guzzling noises as he sucked up lakewater. He belched and wiggled both footpaws.

Capital stuff, water! Fills the old turn, drives away the drought, an’

cools off one’s weary paws. Not as tasty as strawberry fizz, but it’ll do at a pinch, eh wot!

Glancing down at the shaded surface, he saw the reflections of Kurda, Vorto and Riggan standing behind him. Catching sight of a flashing sabre blade, Scarum went into quick action. Grabbing his window pole, he did a straightforward roll into the lake. Twisting about, he came up almost waist deep, facing them with his weapon at the ready.

Bounders, what did your mothers tell you about sneakin’ up on a body, eh? Jolly bad form, if y’ask me!

Kurda grinned out through clenched teeth. Gedd ‘im out, Vorto!

The Ratguard waded in, thrusting with his spear. Scarum countered with his metal hooked window pole, landing Vorto a thwack on one ear which set his head ringing.

Kurda shoved Riggan forward. Don’t shtand dere! ‘Elp Vorto!

Scarum knew he was in trouble. The only advantage he had was the water at his back. Vorto and Riggan moved apart, getting on either side and outflanking their quarry. The young hare swung his pole left and right, beating off the menace of the spears, which were shorter than his weapon.

Kurda stood on the bank, waiting, knowing he could not keep his defence up for any length of time.

After a while Scarum began to flag. The pole fell lower until it was splashing the water at each stroke. Posturing, with the sabre point held forward, Kurda entered the lake, wading forward toward her victim.

The hare thrust at her with his pole, leaving his sides momentarily unguarded. Riggan swung her spear powerfully, catching Scarum a hard blow to the back of his head and knocking him senseless. Kurda retreated swiftly from the lake, not liking having her footpaws wet. I hope you haff not slayed ‘im. Pull der rabbit ashore. He vill die bit by bit, yarr!

Ô

Scarum’s skull throbbed remorselessly. He opened his eyes to find the earth had turned upside down. Riggan was squatting nearby, chewing on a half-ripe pear. She winked at the young hare. Yore goin’ to wish I’d finished yer off in the lake!

Craning his neck painfully upward, Scarum saw that he was bound by both footpaws, suspended from the limb of an alder tree. Riggan gave him a push, which set him swinging. The rabbit’s awake now, marm!

Kurda had been honing her blade on a stone. She came over and stood in front of her prisoner, Scarum decided that he had better mind his manners. Er, good day to you, madam.

The Pure Ferret clipped the top from a rush with an expert flick of the sabre. I am not der madam, I am Queen Kurda of Riftgard. Nobeast in all der Nort’lands has mine skill mitt der sabre/’

Scarum tried a warm smile. Pleased t’meet you, I’m sure, skilful with the old sabre, wot. Need lots o’ practice for that sort o’ thing, I’ll wager.

Kurda brought the point to rest against Scarum’s nose. Oh yarr, lots of practice, I alvays practice. Sometimes mitt turnips, but dat’s no fun. I like to practice mitt mine sabre on livink beasts.

Scarum gulped. Actually I come from a jolly long line of turnipsÑa dull bunch we are. Er, haha, you should see my old granny turnip, she’s really goin’ to seed this season!

The sabre flicked sideways, shearing the whiskers from one side of Scarum’s face. Kurda narrowed her eyes. First de whiskers, den de ears, von at a time. Ve haff all day to play diss liddle game, yarr?

Scarum could see by the way Riggan and Vorto turned their faces away that his time had come. He dropped all pretences and snarled at his tormentor, Then do your worst, you milk-furred scum, I’ll see you at Hellgates one day. Aye, and I won’t be helpless then!

Scarum raised his voice and yelled out the old Sala-mandastron war cry, hoping to go out bravely. Eualiiii-iaaaa! Blood’n’vinegar, chaps!

Eulaliiiiiiaaaaa!

Kurda’s sabre was upraised when suddenly there came a huge booming answer, which she knew was no echo.