Gerri Hill - One Summer Night

“Why did she just assume you were cheating on her?”

“It was my fault,” Kelly admitted. “I got so involved with the book, I just let everything else in my life go. Not just Kathy. My students, too. I was seldom prepared for my classes.”

“That’s hardly license for someone to go and have an affair.”

“Well, as you so frequently bring up, I had a reputation to contend with. And it was easier for her to think I was seeing someone else. I mean, how do you compete with a computer?”

“So, you’ve always dated? A lot?”

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Kelly’s eyebrows shot up. “You mean, have I always had this nasty reputation?”

“Well, you go out a lot,” Jo said. “Or you did in San Antonio.”

“How do you know?” Kelly demanded.

“Or so I was told,” Jo corrected.

Kelly nodded. “I went out a lot, yes. How else are you going to meet people? That doesn’t mean I slept with them all.” Kelly looked pointedly at Jo. “Do you sleep with everyone you date?”

“I don’t date.”

Their eyes met and held.

“Never?” Kelly asked.

Jo shook her head. “Not since Nancy.”

“Don’t you get lonely?”

Jo shook her head again. “I have a small circle of great friends. I have Harry. I’m perfectly happy,” she said, knowing she was trying to convince herself as much as Kelly.

“Then that night this summer. . . .”

“I don’t really want to talk about that,” Jo said.

She was saved by the phone, and as she talked with one of her students, Kelly cleaned up their lunch, gave her a silent wave good-bye, and left.

On Friday, as they were eating hamburgers and sharing french fries, Jo asked about Kelly’s novel. She thought it was a much safer subject than their dating habits.

"Sheer luck, really. I mean, I think it's good, but there are a lot of books out there that are really, really good. But we'll see. If it's a success, then I'll quit teaching and concentrate on writing full time. If not, I can still teach and write in my spare time."

"Are you writing now?" Jo asked.

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"No, not really. I've got some notes and ideas for another one, but I haven't really started yet. I want to see how this one fares."

"Well, I'm impressed. I hope it does well," Jo said sincerely.

"Thanks. It’ll be out soon, so I’ll force you to read it.”

“Did you write when you were in college? I mean, school newspaper, that sort of thing?”

“Oh, no. Only the nerds did that! I was into sports.”

They both reached for a french fry at the same time, and Jo grabbed one of Kelly’s fingers instead.

“Hungry?” Kelly teased.

“Sorry,” Jo murmured.

“Why don’t we go out for dinner tonight and talk?”

Kelly asked suddenly.

"No, thank you.” Jo sipped her drink, refusing to meet Kelly’s eyes.

"Why not?" Kelly asked.

"Because I don't want to spend time with you, that's why.” Jo put her burger down and looked at her.

"Why not?" she asked again.

"Because I don't want to like you any more than I already do," she confessed.

"Why don't you want to like me?"

Jo frowned at her. "Because it's no good, that's why."

"You're wrong. It was very good, Jo."

"That's not what I mean. This is not just about sex, about this attraction between us," she said quietly. Her door was still open and she hoped no one was outside in the hall.

She wrapped up the rest of her uneaten burger and tossed it in the trash.

"Are you attracted to me?" Kelly asked, eyebrows raised.

Jo didn't answer.

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"Can't you even say it to me?"

"I don't want to get involved with you," she admitted.

"We're already involved," Kelly said. She threw the rest of her burger out, too.

"No, we're not."

"Yes, we are, whether you like it or not."

"Oh, Kelly, please. We're going in circles here.” Jo stood up and walked to the door. "I don't want to have this conversation with you."

Kelly watched her for a moment in silence, then walked to the door, too. "Okay, fair enough. I understand. You're attracted to me but you don't like me. Or you don't like what you think you know about me, is that it?"

Jo saw that Kelly was hurt, but said nothing.

“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m attracted to you, too.

I want us to get to know one another, to see if there’s something here. Jo, this summer. . . .”

“No. Kelly, don’t turn that into something that it’s not.

I had too much to drink, I was. . . .”

“Temporarily insane. Yes, I know.”

Kelly raised her hands in defeat. "I'll leave you alone, Jo. I'm sorry I've been bothering you, but I guess you're right. There's nothing between us after all.” She turned and walked away without looking back.

Jo hated this. She wanted things to remain the same. She liked Kelly’s teasing, her asking her out to lunch, but she didn't want their relationship to progress. She didn't want to be alone with her. Not because she feared Kelly but because she feared herself. She had no defenses where Kelly was concerned. It would be too easy with Kelly. But she just couldn't allow herself to take a chance. Kelly was not for her.

And the sooner they both realized it, the better.

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Chapter Fourteen

Kelly’s invited?” Jo demanded. “I thought you said just a few friends.”

“Will you get over it already?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jo murmured, while setting the table.

“Fine. Pretend you don’t,” Betsy told her, standing with her hands on her hips and a very disconcerting look on her face. “Kerry and Shea are coming. Kay is bringing that cute girl she had with her at the bar, Toni. Remember her?”

“She looked so young.”

“Yeah. She’s just out of college, I think.”

“Deb?”

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“No. We’re not really that close with Deb. Anyway, if we invited her, where would it stop? We’d just have the whole softball team out here.”

“But Kelly Sambino?” Jo asked again.

“We like her, Jo.”

“She suggested the meal tonight,” Janis added, when she stuck her head out of the kitchen.

“It’s your birthday. Why are you cooking?” Jo asked her.

“It’s lasagna. Betsy wouldn’t know where to start.”

“You know very well I can’t cook,” Betsy reminded Jo.

She took the forks out of her hand and pushed her toward the kitchen. “You’re making me nervous. Go pour the wine or something.”

“I just wish you’d told me she was going to be here.”

“Jo, she’s not going to bother you. I told her to bring a date,” Betsy said.

“A date?”

“Yes. You could have brought someone too, you know.”

Jo glared at her for a second, then went in search of the wine. Great! Not only was she going to spend the evening with Kelly, she was going to spend the evening with Kelly’s date.

“I hope you have enough wine,” Jo said as she pulled the first cork out.

Janis gave her shoulder a squeeze. “We have enough wine. You can have a whole bottle to yourself.”

Jo glared at her, too.

Thankfully, Kerry and Shea arrived first, and Jo was spared seeing Kelly and her mystery date. And why did she even care? She had told Kelly that she would not go out with her, and she meant it. Emotionally, Kelly meant nothing to her. You could hardly say they were even friends. And if she had a date tonight, that was just fine with Jo. Maybe Kelly would quit pestering her about going out.

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“Good to see you again, Jo,” Shea told her.

“You, too. I guess we only run into each other at softball games.”

Kerry grasped her shoulder tightly and Jo leaned away from the larger woman.

“We’re having a backyard party next Saturday,” Kerry said. “We’d like you to come. We’re going to set up the volleyball net and we’ll have barbecue and beer, of course.”