Stephen Dixon - Friends - More Will and Magna Stories

He calls another bookstore and says “I was in your store two weeks ago — maybe three — but anyway, I asked one of the clerks there if he had a new novel by a good friend of mine, William Taub. The title’s Forewarned.” “Yes? So?” the man says. “Well, the clerk said it was on order. Has it come in?” “William Taub’s novel Forewarned? No, we don’t have it…nor do I see any order for it. Did you pay for it by cash, credit card or charge?” “None of those. I didn’t have to. The clerk said that copies of the book had been ordered a week before I even went into your store and that he’d phone me — he took my name and number — when the book came in.” “P and P Bookshop you’re talking about?” and Will says “P and P? No, I don’t even know where that is. Everyman’s Bookstore on Eighty-Sixth and Third. I’m sorry, I must have called the wrong store.”

He calls another bookstore and says “About two weeks ago one of your clerks said — at the cash register — that a novel I inquired about, Forewarned , by William Taub, would be in in a few days and she’d call me, but she never did. Do you know if you got it in yet?” and the man says “Forewarned! Nobody here ordered that book.” “This is Everyman’s Bookshop, am I wrong?” and the man says “Bookstore, Everyman’s Bookstore, you’re right, but I’m the one who does all the ordering here and I’m certain I didn’t order it. South Street Press. Publishing date was November or December. I know the book. You recall the name of the clerk who took care of you?” “No I don’t. How can I? It was a woman though.” “Around what age was she?” and Will says “Young, or not that young. Thirty-five I’d say, or a little less or more. Really, I can’t even be sure of that. I wasn’t paying much attention to her looks. I came in with my little girl — she was in a stroller — so my attention was going back and forth from the clerk, my child, the book, ordering, and so on. Maybe the clerk would remember me.” “We only have two women salespersons in this store. One’s quite young — Karen — and the other has been with us for almost thirty years and was around the age you say when she started here, so she’s much older than the woman you even vaguely describe. But since you say it was Everyman’s Bookstore you ordered this title from, I’m sitting here trying to figure out how the error could have been made and what to do about it now.” “Maybe it wasn’t Everyman’s then — I was almost sure it was but I no longer am. I’d been out for about three hours with my baby that day, and between — you know — ducking in here and there, taking care of her, looking for an un-crowded luncheonette at the peak of the lunch hour when she suddenly got hungry and I realized I’d forgotten her food — it was around noon or one when I was in your store, or just a bookstore. Anyway, let’s say yours wasn’t the one on Madison I ordered the book from—” “We’re right off Third, not Madison, on Eighty-Sixth.” “Then I’m really confused — blocks away from where I thought I was. No, mine was — well now I’m not even sure what avenue it was on. Madison, I thought — the upper East Side I’m sure. Look, since I don’t think I’ll ever remember what store I ordered the book from, why don’t I just ask if first, you have any copies of the book in stock, and if you don’t, could you possibly order a couple of copies for me?” “We haven’t the book but we can order any number of copies for you if you don’t mind paying for them beforehand. Nothing personal to do with you, you understand, but we had a terrible time last year taking special orders over the phone — I’m not going to go into it — so we’ve discontinued that policy except for our oldest customers. What I suggest is you come in, if it’s no inconvenience for you, pay for the books by cash or credit card, and we’ll have them in a week or so and we’ll even mail them to you if you also pay those mailing costs.” “Actually, it would be a little inconvenient to come in in the next few days.” “Then perhaps, not that I like steering business away from us, you’ll have better luck ordering the book over the phone in one of the other stores around here. P and P, for instance. Or Greer’s on Eighty-Third, Classics and Company on Lexington and Seventy-Fourth, or any of the three Ralston stores further downtown.” “Thanks. That’s a good idea. Maybe I will.”

Magna comes into the room. “Oh, Will, you’re reading in bed. That’s what I had decided to do. Would you mind if I joined you?”

“Come ahead.”

She lies beside me on the bed and opens her book. I return to my book. She says after about a minute “Suppose I told you I don’t want to read right now?”

“Let’s say you just told me.”

“That’s what I meant. Suppose I did. What would you say?”

“I’d say ‘What do you mean you don’t want to read right now?’”

“And suppose I answered that I don’t want to read right now because I have something else in mind?”

“Then I’d ask what that is.”

“Let’s say you have asked.”

“Let’s say I have.”

“And let’s say I then said I’d like to sleep with you right now.”

“So?”

“Well, what’s your reply?”

“My reply?” I put my book down and think. “My reply?” She puts her book on top of my book between us. Her cat jumps on the bed and lies on my feet. I say “Do you think your cat should be on the bed at a time like this?”

“What time is that?”

“A time when I’m about to say that I think it’s a pretty good idea if we do sleep together right now.”

“If you did say that then I’d say it probably isn’t a good time for my cat to be on the bed.”

“All right, let’s say I said it.”

“Then I suppose I should tell the cat to get off the bed.”

“Why don’t you?”

“I will.”

Just then the cat jumps off the bed and runs underneath it.

“It seems,” she says, “I didn’t have to tell the cat to get off the bed.”

“Seems so. But what next?”

“What next what? That I should do something about getting it out from under the bed and maybe even out of the room?”

“No, let it stay there, what’s the harm? I mean about our sleeping together.”

“About that I’d say I think we should start.”

“And to that I’d say that I think we already did start when we began talking about it and put our books down.”

“But we put our books down between us. That might end up being a little too uncomfortable for us if we actually do start sleeping with each other right now.”

“‘Sleeping’ as whatever figure of speech it is for ‘making love,’ I suppose. I mean, that is what you had in mind when you said ‘sleeping,’ isn’t it?”

“First making love, then maybe sleeping together on this bed if we like.”

“That’s what I thought.” I take the books in one hand and drop them on the floor. The cat runs out from under the bed and down the stairs.

“I didn’t intend, I want you to know, to scare the cat away by dropping the books.”

“If you say so, then you didn’t,” she says.

“Didn’t intend to.”

“Right.”

“But you did think I might have intended to scare it, isn’t that so?”

“I thought you might have intended to, but I didn’t worry about it much.”

“You worried about it a little, though, no?”

“What happened was this. When you dropped the books and that cat ran out I thought for a second or two you might have intentionally scared my cat by dropping the books you were getting rid of for us and that that act could indicate something about your personality or nature or whatever it’s called that I might not like about you. But it turned out not to be so. You didn’t try to scare it. Or did you?”