Lee Martin - Late One Night

Boys at school made goat noises sometimes when he was near. They flicked lit matches at him and called him Scarecrow after the character in The Wizard of Oz .

Whether it was those boys who night after night came driving by the Rowe house, their car and truck horns blasting, or else adults who’d forgotten how to be civil, no one could say.

Then someone went too far. Someone came one night when Shooter and Captain were in Phillipsport doing their grocery shopping, and they went to work on the side of the barn with a red spray paint can. It was the side people could see from the road. They could drive by and see the gigantic red letters spelling out KILLER.

That was too much for Missy. She knocked on Shooter’s door and told him she was sorry for his trouble.

“I don’t approve of the way you handled things,” she said, “but you and Captain don’t deserve this.”

“Yes, I do,” he said, and then he closed the door.

_________

Ronnie told Angel he was sorry. He should have told her everything the night she showed him his pocketknife, hoping that he’d have some explanation. He did, but he didn’t know how to say the right words to her then, so he kept quiet, and in his silence, a horrible possibility took life.

“You know it all now,” he told Angel. “You know I got mad at your mother, and I started to do something bad.” Even though he’d never wanted his girls to know that he’d had thoughts about burning the trailer, had gone as far as spreading some gasoline, it was out in the open now, and he had no choice but to own up to it. “But I stopped myself. I got back to a better way of thinking. I patched the hole in the trailer to keep the pilot light on the furnace from going out. I had no idea you were all inside. I wish I’d knocked on your door. Maybe your mother would have asked me to come inside, and then who knows what might have happened.” His voice got so shaky then he could barely make the words he knew he had to say. “After it happened — after the fire — I was afraid you’d never want me. I didn’t know how to tell you I’d been there that night. I was there, but not when I needed to be. Not when I might have made a difference. I’ll know that the rest of my life.”

Angel said, “Brandi lied to me when she was in the hospital and she told me the story of that night.”

“She didn’t want you to think bad of me,” Ronnie said, “and right now I’m scared to death that you’ll never forgive me.”

Angel threw herself into his arms. She held him tight. She told him how she’d seen sparks outside her bedroom window just before the fire, but she hadn’t thought to get out of bed and move the ash box to the compost the way she was supposed to have done earlier that evening. She told him about how her mother had awakened her that night and told her the trailer was on fire.

“She told me to wake the others and help them to get out.” Here she paused, her breath coming hard, reliving it all in her mind. “I didn’t do it. Hannah was awake, and I told her to run. I ran with her. If I’d only tried to help.”

“Shh.” Ronnie rocked her in his arms. “Shh, now, baby. Shh. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Ronnie waited while the State went through the process of discovering all the facts. In Illinois, his attorney told him, reckless homicide was a Class 3 felony, punishable by two to five years in prison, but probation was a possibility — a strong possibility, the attorney said, given the tragic circumstances and the fact that there were four daughters who needed their father.

Ronnie was able to hire his attorney because Missy Wade turned over the account at the bank to him.

When he called to thank her, she said, “I don’t imagine I’ll ever get over any of this.” Then she told him the story of the day in the bank when her silence started the rumor that he’d had something to do with the fire. “Even though you did what you did, it wasn’t right of me to let that gossip spread, and I’ve got no right now to keep watch on that money.”

The State decided not to prosecute. Even though Ronnie had gone to the trailer that night, he’d done so on the assumption that Della and the kids were at Lois and Wayne’s. Yes, he’d meant to set the trailer on fire, but in the end he’d come to his senses. He’d held his temper in check. He’d never meant for anyone to come to harm.

And now there were his girls to see to, those girls who had suffered enough.

The court put Ronnie on probation and left the question of custody of the children to another hearing.

Missy testified. She spoke of Ronnie’s love for the girls.

“He made mistakes,” she said. “We all made mistakes. But at the end of the day it’s clear to me that he loves those girls. I had no business to try to take them from him, and I wouldn’t want to now. He’s their father. I don’t believe he means them any harm, never meant to hurt them at all.”

Laverne Ott said the options were few. Lois and Wayne were in poor health, and if Missy and Pat, the godparents, were saying they trusted Ronnie, and if the court wanted to avoid a foster home situation, as Laverne believed they did as long as a biological parent was capable and willing, then the proper thing to do would be to entrust the girls’ care to Ronnie.

Finally, the judge asked Laverne to bring each of the girls individually to his chambers.

He asked them, one by one, where they wanted to live.

Angel was direct. “Brandi needs us. We want to be a family.”

Hannah was earnest. “I love my father.”

Sarah had a puzzled look on her face. “Aren’t kids supposed to live with their parents?”

Emma simply said, “Daddy and Brandi.”

“You want to live with your daddy?” the judge asked.

“Yeppers,” Emma said.

Then the judge asked to speak to Ronnie and Laverne.

“Mr. Black, I can’t say I’m pleased with you.”

“No, sir,” Ronnie said.

“You can see why this is a difficult decision.”

“Yes, sir, I can. I’ve not always been an upright man, but this has changed me. I’ve owned up to everything. I’m just hoping for a chance to keep my girls.”

The judge tapped the end of a pencil on his desk and studied Ronnie a good long while.

“Children’s Protective Services will have a sharp eye on you. Isn’t that right, Miss Ott?”

“You can count on it,” Laverne said.

“And this court will be watching you. Mr. Black, I feel you’ve lost enough. Make sure you make good on this second chance.”

Brandi and Ronnie gave the story of Captain a good deal of thought on those evenings when Ronnie sat with her while she was lying in bed as her doctor had commanded. Brandi had already thought hard about what she knew about Ronnie. He’d gone out to the trailer that night meaning to burn it. He spread that gasoline. Then he saw a hole in the siding and got his senses back. He tried to do a good thing. He patched that hole and then he came back to town and got into bed beside her. He was still there. After everything they’d gone through, he was still there. The baby was coming, and she wasn’t alone. She told Ronnie to forgive himself for what he almost did that night. She told him to believe in love.

Her due date at the first of July seemed far in the distance, but neither she nor Ronnie complained. Time seemed to slow down for them, and that’s exactly what they needed. Too much had been happening too quickly. Now they had the drowsy evenings of winter. They had time to talk.

They played board games with the girls. Then once Ronnie had them off to bed, he and Brandi lay close together, and he rubbed his hand gently over her stomach and felt the baby kick, and the joy of those moments was so pure and good there was no need for either of them to say a word.