Elin Hilderbrand - Winter Stroll

“You are? ” Ava whispers back.

“Ssssshhh,” Margaret says. “Don’t tell anyone just yet. This is Kevin’s moment.”

Ava nods and smiles dutifully for the camera. Her mother is going to marry Drake. They are going to be very happy -Ava can feel it in her bones. She doesn’t understand how she can be so sure about her mother’s romantic prospects and so unsure about her own.

After pictures, Ava approaches Scott. “Are you coming to lunch?” she asks.

“No,” he says. “I don’t think so.”

Ava stammers. “Oh… okay?” She had thought that him showing up to the service and sitting through pictures meant that she was forgiven. She had thought they would pick up where they left off at their last happy moment-singing carols in their hideous sweaters at Our Island Home. She had thought Scott might make a joke about introducing Nathaniel to Roxanne, at which point, Ava would say, Nathaniel is thirty-two, isn’t that a little old for Roxanne?

Scott says, “I’m going to give you some space for a while. Let you figure out what you want.”

“It’s like you said this morning,” Ava says. “I want you. I want us. I want to get married and have a baby.” She points to Shelby and Zack, who are leaving the church hand in hand. “I want that .”

“I know you want to get married and have children,” Scott says. “But maybe not with me.”

Ava opens her mouth and no words come out. She doesn’t want to make a scene. They are still in the sanctuary, and Ava’s family is milling about. Jennifer is over by the candles with Barrett; her voice is probably louder than it ought to be as she speaks to Barrett about his “piss-poor attitude” since his father has been gone. Thankfully, Kelley shuttles Jennifer and Barrett out the door.

Scott says, “Ava, I’m tired. I’ve barely slept in two days, and I have to pick up Roxanne’s prescriptions at the pharmacy and drop them off at her house.”

“What?” Ava says. Roxanne, again! She wonders if Scott’s offer of “space” doesn’t have something to do with Roxanne. Maybe during the past thirty-six hours, he has fallen a little in love with Mz. Ohhhhhh.

“Ava,” Scott says wearily. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“ When later?” she says.

“I don’t know,” Scott says. “I’m sure I’ll see you tomorrow at school.”

Naturally, Ava will see Scott tomorrow at school-and the next day, and the day after that. How awkward it will be to see Scott in his capacity as her boss while their relationship is suspended, while he is, ostensibly, giving her space. How are they supposed to work in the same building? What will she say to him when they’re standing next to each other in line at the cafeteria?

“You can’t give me space,” Ava says.

“You need it,” Scott says. He kisses her gently on the lips, and it feels exactly like a kiss good-bye.

Ava watches Scott stride out of the church. She wonders how she could have so thoroughly dismantled her relationship over the course of one short weekend.

She takes a deep breath and reacquaints herself with her purse and her wrap. Now, everyone else has left the church and will be on their way to the Sea Grille for lunch, leaving Ava stranded. Certainly the rest of her family assumed she was getting a ride to the restaurant with Scott. She’ll have to walk all the way back to the inn and get her own car.

When she steps out of the church into the glare of the bright, cold day, she sees Nathaniel on the sidewalk waiting for her.

She shakes her head. This isn’t happening! For two and a half years, she couldn’t get the guy to pay attention to her-now, he won’t leave her alone! Now, he has effectively ravaged the great thing Ava had going with Scott. Scott must have seen Nathaniel when he left the church. Possibly, Scott thought Ava had asked Nathaniel to linger after the service.

She says, “Honestly? You can’t stay away? You can’t leave me alone? Scott just basically broke up with me -because of you! Because he thinks I’m ‘confused’ and ‘need space’! And you know what? I am confused!” She’s on the verge of tears. Her Christmas Stroll weekend is ruined. Nothing turned out the way it was supposed to. Her caroling party was a disaster, the Festival of Trees a catastrophe, and now here she is, godmother to the most precious baby girl in all the world and she’s about to weep on the front steps of the church.

“Ava,” Nathaniel says, “I’m not giving up. I’m not going away. I love you.”

He loves her.

She’s going to have to make a decision.

Nathaniel says, “What are you doing right now? Do you want to go for a ride up the beach? Do you want to go to my house and watch the Patriots? I’ll make my white chicken chili.”

“I’m going to lunch with my family,” Ava says. “They all left without me.”

“Do you want me to come with you?” Nathaniel asks. “Or can I give you a ride?”

“No thank you,” Ava says. “I’m going alone.”

Margaret and Drake ride from the church to the Sea Grille with Mitzi and Kelley. As soon as Margaret is ensconced in the backseat, she whips out her phone.

Somehow, Kelley sees her. “Always working, Margaret.”

Margaret is so tense, she nearly snaps at him. This used to be Kelley’s refrain with her throughout the entirety of their marriage, which ended twenty years ago-so why does Margaret still have to listen to it? Margaret is only “working” because it involves Kelley’s son!

“That’s right,” she murmurs.

Mitzi swats Kelley on the arm. “She has a very important job.”

“I know, I know,” Kelley says.

Margaret can feel Drake’s gaze on her.

There are no texts, no calls, no emails. And no new headlines on the CBS website.

Slowly, Margaret shakes her head.

From the instant he walks into the Sea Grille for lunch, he can tell it’s going to be a disappointment. Or maybe he’s just tired. Isabelle is fretting because the baby is having a meltdown.

Kevin says, “She was a perfect angel at church. That’s the important thing.”

Isabelle says, “She needs her nap, Kevin. She did not sleep well last night.” There is an accusatory tone to Isabelle’s voice, and Kevin almost takes the bait. He almost says, And whose fault is that? Who took the baby to sleep in an unfamiliar room at a strange hotel? But he holds his tongue. He has apologized for his conversation with Norah Vale; he has reassured Isabelle that Norah is rien, nothing, while Isabelle is tout, everything. They have kissed and made up. He doesn’t want to revisit the topic.

He says, “We’ll put her down for a nap right after lunch.”

Isabelle nods, tight-lipped. They carry Genevieve, who is now screaming bloody murder, into the restaurant.

Kelley and Mitzi are already at the table. When Kevin said earlier that Kelley looked awful, he meant it. His father’s skin is gray; he looks like a pencil drawing of his usual self, and his hands shake as he brings a glass of ice water to his lips. Next to Kelley, Mitzi is smiling, but skeletal; she has lost a lot of weight over the past year.

Both Kelley and Mitzi swivel in their chairs as soon as they hear the baby. Kevin wouldn’t be surprised if the whole island can hear the baby. Genevieve is howling so loudly, her car seat vibrates. Her tiny mouth is wide open and Kevin can see clear down her throat.

Mitzi stands up. “Oh, poor little thing. Can I hold her?”

Kevin feels Isabelle stiffen next to him. The rest of the family has rolled along pretty easily with Mitzi’s apparent return to the homestead, but Isabelle remains nonplussed. Mitzi is back? she asked incredulously on Saturday night, before they all went out. She is forgiven? She had asked Kevin who made breakfast in her absence, and when Kevin said, “Mitzi did,” Isabelle emitted a high-pitched, very unhappy Ha!