Beatrice Sparks - Go Ask Alice

I only got to see Joel alone for about ten minutes when we sat on the porch steps before Dad drove him back to wherever he’s staying. I even forgot to ask we had so much to talk about but I’m sure he likes me in a quiet, soft, gentle, permanent, lasting way. We held hands most of the evening, but that didn’t mean too much because Alex was hanging on to the other one and Tim kept trying to drag him off to show him all the things he’d collected over the summer.

Well, if I’m going to get up and practice at six and face tomorrow I’d better get some sleep. Besides I want to dream about lovely today and how much more lovely every day after today is going to be.

I woke up even before the alarm went off. It’s only five minutes after five and I doubt that anyone else on this block is up, but I am so wide awake I can barely stand it. Frankly, I think I’m scared witless inside about going back to school but in my head I know it’s going to be all right because I have Joel and my new super straight friends and they’ll help me. Besides I’m much stronger than I used to be. I know I am.

I used to think I would get another diary after you are filled, or even that I would keep a diary or journal through my whole life. But now I don’t really think I will. Diaries are great when you’re young. In fact, you saved my sanity a hundred, thousand, million times. But I think when a person gets older she should be able to discuss her problems and thoughts with other people, instead of just with another part of herself as you have been to me. Don’t you agree? I hope so, for you are my dearest friend and I shall thank you always for sharing my tears and heartaches and my struggles and strifes, and my joys and happinesses. It’s all been good in its own special way, I guess. See ya.

The subject of this book died three weeks after her decision not to keep another diary.

Her parents came home from a movie and found her dead. They called the police and the hospital but there was nothing anyone could do.

Was it an accidental overdose? A premeditated overdose? No one knows, and in some ways that question isn’t important. What must be of concern is that she died, and that she was only one of thousands of drug deaths that year.

If you purchased this book without a cover you should be aware that this book is stolen property. It was reported as “unsold and destroyed” to the publisher and neither the author nor the publisher has received any payment for this “stripped book.”

First paperback edition March 1998

Go Ask Alice taken from “White Rabbit,” written by Grace Slick. Copyright 1967. Irving Music. Inc. Copper Penny Music Publishing Co., by permission, all rights reserved.

Go Ask Alice Author anonymous

Copyright © 1971 by Simon & Schuster Inc.

Simon Pulse

An imprint of Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing Division

1230 Avenue of the Americas

New York, NY 10020

All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form.

Also available in a Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers hardcover edition.

Printed and bound in the United States of America

20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13 12

The Library of Congress has cataloged the hardcover edition as follows:

Library of Congress Catalog Card Number-. 74-159446

ISBN 0-671-66458-1 (hc)

ISBN 0-60-81785-1 (Pulse pbk.)

There are no dates for the Following material. It was recorded on single sheets of paper, paper bags, etc.

Drugs.

Baby prostitute.

Detention school.