Iris Murdoch - Under the Net

'Well, put it on each way, for heaven's sake,' I said.

I poured myself out another stiff glass. I am not a natural gambler.

Sammy was on the phone staking twenty pounds at Nottingham. Then he was asking for the winner of the three o'clock race at Salisbury. I sat down on the floor. Sammy stood to lose more money than I had in the bank. My nerves were vibrating like the strings of a harp. I wished I'd never suggested it.

'Stop looking green,' said Sammy. 'It's only money! And just guess who won the three o'clock. Little Grange at two to one on!'

This made it worse. 'But it's a double,' I said. 'Doubles never work. It's just a way of losing more than one's stake.'

'Shut up,' said Sammy, 'and leave the worrying to me. If you can't stand it you can go and sit on the landing.'

He was working out on a piece of paper how much we were going to win. 'Queen's Rook won't lose,' said Sammy, 'but we're covered anyway by the four-thirty. Twenty-five quid each way on the two of them just to please you. There's security for you! You put it down and you pick it up!'

I was working out how much we were going to lose. This was easier and could be done in the head. I made it a hundred and sixty pounds. I was tempted to go away and leave Sammy to it, but dignity forbade me to desert him in what was after all my own enterprise. Besides this, the question was academic, since too much whisky on an empty stomach had by now immobilized me completely. My legs felt as if they were stuffed with straw. I groaned. Sammy was ringing up about the next race. Queen's Rook had been beaten by a head but Saint Cross had won at Nottingham.

This was worse than anything. 'Confound you,' I said, 'why didn't you do what I told you about Little Grange? Now we're forty pounds down and we haven't even won anything on Saint Cross.'

'That just makes it better sport,' said Sammy. 'Believe you me, today's your lucky day. What's today? Wednesday? Well, Wednesday's your lucky day. It's years since I've really gambled,' said Sammy, 'I'd quite forgotten the feeling!' He was rubbing his hands with hideous zest.

'You know, boy,' he said, 'it does me good to meet someone like you now and then. Makes me realize the value of money!'

When the four o'clock race at Nottingham was won by Hal Adair, cool channels of sweat ran down my back and sides. I didn't feel it was my lucky day, and even Sammy was showing signs of strain. He drank what remained of the whisky and told me that the trouble with me was that I didn't take a thing like this in the right spirit.

'Getting cash is like taming a lion,' said Sammy. 'Never let it see that you care.'

My head, after describing gentle circles, subsided on to the carpet, carrying the rest of my trunk with it. I turned my face under the sofa. 'Filthy lucre! Filthy lucre!' I could hear Sammy saying, with the voice of a man cursing the woman he has ruined. When 4.30 approached, the atmosphere was electric. Sammy was on the phone before the race was even started, but I hardly listened, I was too busy wondering how I would raise the money to pay him back. I decided that if I gave him the radiogram we'd be approximately quits.

I could hear Sammy saying, 'Come on, Andy, look sharp. I've got a friend here who's biting the furniture.'

Then I heard Sammy swearing. 'What is it?' I asked languidly. 'Elaine's Choice didn't run,' said Sammy, 'and Dagenham was fourth.'

'What about Nottingham?' I asked without interest.

'Wait,' said Sammy, who was glued to the phone again. I began to roll gently under the sofa.

Then I heard him shout, 'By God, we've done it! I said you had a lucky face!' I rolled out again and my torso regained the vertical.

'Peter of Alex at nine to two!' shouted Sammy. 'Quick, open another bottle!'

We both struggled with the bottle, broke a glass, and sat on the floor laughing like mad things and toasting each other. The room was beginning to undulate gently about me and I wasn't sure that I knew what was happening. Sammy was shouting, 'Well done the old firm!' and 'Can I pick them or can I pick them!' and checking his sums.

'Look,' he said, 'Saint Cross was at seven to two, that makes ninety pounds on Hal Adair at two to one on, that makes a hundred and thirty-five pounds on Peter of Alex at nine to two, that makes seven hundred and twenty-two pounds ten. Considering the meetings, it's decent odds. What did I tell you? Better than scribbling, what?' Sammy waved the bottle in the air.

'Wait a moment,' I said. 'There's the forty pounds that went down on Queen's Rook and there's the each way bet at Salisbury.'

Oh, forget it!' said Sammy. 'Remember the bookie wins every day. That's why I've enjoyed this so much.'

No, you damn well stick to the agreement!' I shouted. What was left of my honour was at stake.

After some more shouting Sammy agreed to the deduction. 'All right, Donaghue,' he said. 'That makes six hundred and thirty-three pounds ten. I'll write the cheque now. The money'll go into my account.' He produced his cheque-book again.

This sobered me up. I had a curious sense of being back at the beginning, only now Sammy was offering me three times as much. I couldn't credit it, now that the excitement was over, that Sammy could really have won so much cash just by saying things into the telephone.

I told Sammy this and he laughed at me. 'Your trouble is,' he said, 'you're too used to sweating blood for money. But that's not the way to get it. Just lie on your back and whistle and it'll come.' Eventually we agreed that Sammy should wait to send me the cheque until he had received the account showing his winnings. That would convince me that the transaction was real. He exclaimed a lot about how decent it was of me to trust him, and I gave him Dave's address and staggered up to go. Sammy ordered me a taxi. He was so far from disputing my claim to the radiogram that I think he would have let me take away the whole flat and helped me to carry it down the stairs. We stowed the radiogram beside the taxi-driver and then took leave of each other with many exclamations of regard. 'That was good sport!' said Sammy. We must do it another day!'

The taxi took me to the Goldhawk Road, and the taxi-driver conveyed both me and the radiogram up the stairs. I burst in on Dave and Finn, laughing like a lunatic. When they asked me what was so funny I told them I was going to take a job as Sadie's bodyguard--and this when I explained it certainly seemed funny enough. I said nothing about either Hugo or Sammy. Finn and Dave received my project, the latter with sarcasm, the former with expectant interest. I think I am a constant source of entertainment to Finn. After that I went to bed and fell into a drunken sleep.

Six

It was about 9.15, on the appointed morning, when I reached Welbeck Street, as I had to go first to Mrs Tinckham's to collect my manuscripts. I found the door open and Sadie fretting and fuming about the hall.

'My dear creature,' she said, 'thank heavens you've come. When I say dawn to dusk I mean dawn to dusk. You've made me madly late. Never mind, don't look like that, come in. I see you've brought enough scribbling-paper to last a year. That's just as well. Listen, I want you, just for today and tomorrow, to stay here all day. Do you mind? I'll feel better if I know someone's here all the time. There's oceans to drink and the fridge is just full of salmon and raspberries and things. Don't invite your friends in though, there's an angel. If Belfounder or anybody telephones just say in a stern masculine voice that I'm out indefinitely. There's an utter darling. Now I must absolutely run.'

When'll you be back?' I asked, rather overwhelmed by these instructions.

'Oh, late tonight,' said Sadie. 'Don't wait up. Just choose yourself one of the spare rooms. The beds are all made.' Then she kissed me with considerable enthusiasm and went away.