Элин Хильдебранд - What Happens in Paradise

“And what else?”

“What’s with the third degree?” Mick asks.

She didn’t sleep with Baker. When he pulled up alongside of her out of the blue, she thought, Is this really happening? And then, without thinking twice, she’d climbed into the car with him and directed him to Hawksnest. She thought they would just sit in the parking lot and talk but that wasn’t very romantic, so she led him down the path toward the beach, which was deserted, and she thought, Is that what I want? Romantic?

The truth is, she hasn’t stopped thinking of him since he left. She doesn’t want to like him, but she does. And reading Rosie’s journals is screwing with her head. Rosie willingly had an affair with a man she knew was married. Ayers’s own dear, sweet friend, a person Ayers admired and respected, did that. The story in the diary is, at least, providing some context. Russ was unhappy, at a crossroads career-wise, and he’d been dropped into paradise for the weekend, where he’d met Rosie, who even on her worst day was achingly beautiful. Something had sparked between them—then ignited. It’s the spark and the flame that intrigue Ayers. Did two good people do something they knew was wrong because there was some kind of magical chemistry involved? Or was it plain old human fallibility, weakness in the face of temptation?

Ayers isn’t sure. What she is drawn to in Rosie’s journal is the rawness of Rosie’s desire for Russ and her pain when he leaves.

Has Ayers ever felt that way about anyone? Does she feel that way about Mick? She was hurt and angry—really angry—when she found Mick with Brigid, but that pain might simply have been the blow to her self-esteem and the sting of being rejected. The truth is, the way she feels about Mick now has changed. She still loves him but she doesn’t trust him and she doesn’t trust herself, and sometimes she thinks she went back to him only because it was comfortable and familiar, whereas the idea of embarking on a whole new relationship with Baker Steele is terrifying. And unrealistic. He’s still married. He lives in Houston.

Once they were on the beach, Baker reached for Ayers’s hand, but she batted him away, then turned to confront him. There wasn’t a moon; it was really dark. Ayers could barely see Baker, but despite this, there was an instant pull of attraction. He was so tall and broad; she loved having to crane her neck to look up at him. He had a fresh haircut, she’d noticed; it looked good with his chiseled features and his dimple. He’d gone soft around the middle and there was something dad-like and a little nerdy in his demeanor. But these things set her at ease.

“I didn’t bring you here for that,” Ayers said. “I want to talk.”

Baker nodded. “Yeah, me too. Sorry, it’s a beach, we were walking, I’ve been thinking of you every second of every day since I left, so believe me when I say that reaching for your hand was something I did instinctively.”

“I need to know a couple things,” she said. “One, are you still married?”

“Legally, yes,” Baker said. “It’s only been a few weeks. But Anna, my wife, accepted a surgical post at the Cleveland Clinic with her girlfriend, Louisa, so they’re moving and giving me physical custody of Floyd.”

“Have you started divorce proceedings?” Ayers asked. “Have you spoken to a lawyer?”

“We’re using a mediator,” Baker said. “And yes, I’ve spoken to her. This is happening. There’s no going back. I actually had dinner with Anna and Louisa a few days ago, and, wow, they’re together . Two peas in a pod. An intimidating pair.”

Intimidating, Ayers thought, because they weren’t sexually attracted to men. Ayers let Baker’s typical attitude slide because she had a more pressing question. “How long are you staying down here?”

“We’re moving here,” Baker said. “I have Floyd with me. I want to put him in school.”

This wasn’t the answer Ayers was expecting. “So you packed up all your stuff and shipped it down here?”

“Well…” Baker said.

No, she didn’t think so. It would have been too good to be true.

“We’re here for two weeks. Then I have to go back to Houston for this event at Floyd’s school.”

Which he was supposedly pulling Floyd out of.

“And then I’ll take care of packing up the rest of what we need.”

“So it’s your intention to move down here,” Ayers said. “But if after two weeks you aren’t feeling it, you’ll go back to Houston.”

“It’s my intention to stay,” Baker said. “Cash is staying. And tonight I found out my mother is coming down. So I’ll have a built-in support system.”

Irene, Ayers thought. She had a whole new set of feelings about Irene now that she’d read Rosie’s journals—mostly fear that she, Ayers, could someday be duped and blindsided as badly as Irene had been. It was so important to stay vigilant where your heart was concerned. Why didn’t they teach you that in school?

“What about a job?” Ayers said. “Cash has a job, with me.” Even in the darkness, she could see Baker wince. “I won’t believe you’re staying until you have something tethering you to this island.”

“I’m going to look for a job,” Baker said. “I day-trade for money, I can do that anywhere, which is how I’m able to pick up and leave Houston. But I want something part-time here, something flexible so I can still be around for Floyd. I admit I don’t have any leads yet. I just got here today. The first thing I wanted to do was find you.”

“I’m still with Mick,” Ayers said.

“I know,” Baker said. “Cash told me.” He reached out and touched a strand of her hair. “I’m not going to put any pressure on you. I just want you to know that I’m here because of you.”

Against her wishes, this affected her. “I’m with Mick,” she said again, weakly.

“Well, if things don’t work out with Mick, I’ll be here waiting.” He grinned. “Like a complete idiot. An utter fool.”

She laughed, then they stood smiling at each other and she thought, He’s going to try and kiss me.

He bent down toward her—but stopped. “Come on,” he said. “I’ll take you back to town.”

Wednesday morning, Ayers drives down to Treasure Island and Mick follows behind her in his blue Jeep with Gordon hanging his head over the side. They’re on their way to the ferry; Mick honks as he peels off.

They have a full boat today, twenty people, six of them kids, and handling that is a tall order, especially because it’s only Cash’s third day of work, his first without Wade there to train him. But Cash seems to be a natural when it comes to managing groups of strangers all keyed up for an adventure. He’s courteous and convivial, he has the gift of gab, and it’s clear that he takes his procedural responsibilities—the passport paperwork, tying up at the docks, cleaning and prepping all the snorkel equipment, and assisting with any young, old, or infirm guests—very seriously. Of course, this job offers a different roll of the dice each and every day; that’s one of the things Ayers likes about it. Occasionally there are mechanical issues with the boat or the weather isn’t great, but that’s for Captain James to deal with. Ayers and Cash handle the humans.

Ayers goes to the top deck to put out the seat cushions. Six kids is a lot, she thinks, especially if the parents start drinking. She decides to tell Cash that she’ll manage the kids and he’ll be in charge of the adults.

Adults are easier. Most of the time.

From her perch, Ayers spies Mick on the top deck of the ferry, Gordon with him on a leash, garnering attention from every dog lover on the boat. Mick took Gordon with him because, with both Ayers and Mick gone all day, there’d be no one to let him out. Still, Ayers suspects Mick also brought Gordon because Gordon is a chick magnet. And sure enough, a girl with long brown hair in a cute white sundress takes the seat next to Mick. The girl puts her arm around Mick and lays her head on his shoulder, so it must be someone they know. Ayers squints; the girl lifts her head and turns.