Даниэла Стил - All That Glitters

“What do you want?”

“To talk to my wife.” He got down on both knees and begged her forgiveness. He looked so ridiculous, but all she could think of was how he looked when he was having sex with the girl from marketing. It was an image she knew she would never get out of her head.

“I’m divorcing you. Go away,” she said, walked back into the house, and slammed the door in his face. He stood ringing the doorbell for half an hour. She went upstairs so she didn’t have to hear him, and he finally left.

She went to work every day after that, and when the lawyer called back, she made an appointment with him for the following week. She was going to call Ed, but not until after she’d seen the lawyer. She hated admitting to him that her marriage was a disaster.

Nigel sent her flowers, emails, voicemails, and texts. She didn’t respond to any of it. When she finally listened to one of his messages, he swore he would never do it again. He kept bombarding her for days that turned into weeks. She had seen the lawyer. He was poised to file for divorce in January. She wasn’t eligible to do so before that. They had to be married for a year to divorce. Finally after two months, she took a call from Nigel. She was trying to decide if she should sell the house, or live in it herself. She didn’t need a house that size. But she was enjoying working with Leslie, and didn’t want to go back to New York.

“Why are you still calling me?” she said when she took Nigel’s call. It was mid-November, and it had been six weeks since she’d spoken to him. She missed him, but she missed who she’d thought he was, not who he turned out to be.

“I’m calling you because I love you, and I’m sorry. We’re married. Can’t you please give it another chance?”

“I don’t trust you anymore, Nigel. I never will again. This wasn’t a marriage, it was a prison sentence for both of us.” And a very expensive one for her.

“The house in Sussex is beautiful. Won’t you come and see it with me?”

“No. Is that where you’re living?” He didn’t answer her, afraid that she would throw him out if he admitted it. He’d been living at the house in Sussex since he’d left. It had never occurred to her that he was there. “You have no business being there. I own that house too.” He had no shame. He was still using her, even now.

“You own everything, Coco, including me, heart and soul.”

“Apparently, your dick was never part of that deal,” she said coldly and he winced. “I can’t live with a man I don’t trust.”

“I swear to you, on my life, I will never cheat on you again.”

“I don’t believe you,” she said sadly. She had made a terrible mistake with him, and she knew that now. She had two houses she didn’t want, and would be divorced, because of him.

“What do you have to lose by giving me another chance? If I do something bad again, you won’t have to throw me out. I’ll go. Please, Coco, can’t you be merciful this one time?”

“Did you find a job?” she asked coldly.

“I’ve been too upset about us to look for work.”

“I’m upset too, and I go to work every day.”

“You’re stronger than I am,” he said, sounding lame. “I’m broken over this. I’ll never get over it.” He was trying everything. “Have mercy on me, Coco, please…” He was crying at his end and she actually felt sorry for him, in spite of how angry she still was. “Will you have lunch with me?” She knew she shouldn’t, but thought that maybe they could end it on a kinder note. She didn’t want to be angry and hate him for the rest of her life. She had been so in love with him, they could at least say goodbye, she reasoned with herself, and finally agreed to have lunch with him at the pub nearby. He sounded deeply grateful and humble when she agreed.

She met him the next day, and he looked terrible. He had lost at least ten pounds, had dark circles under his eyes, and the handsome face looked ravaged. She was the injured party here and she looked better than he did. She could see how sorry he was from the look in his eyes.

She tried to keep the conversation as neutral as she could, and at the end of lunch, he asked if he could come to the house to pick up some of his things. She hadn’t known where to send them, and hadn’t thrown them away. His computer was still on his desk and he said he needed it for his job search. His CV was on it, and a list of all the people he needed to call for work.

“Fine. Why don’t we go now. I don’t have to be back at work for half an hour.” He followed her back in his car, the green Jaguar, after he paid for lunch. He followed her meekly up the steps, and went straight to his office, while she went to hers and gathered up some things she needed for a meeting that afternoon. He was taking a long time, and when she walked into his office to remind him that she had to leave, he was crying with his head on the desk. It was embarrassing to see him that way, and she went over and patted his shoulder. When she did, he put his arms around her waist and held her as he used to, and something stirred in her that she had hoped was dead. But it wasn’t yet. The last embers of their love were dying, but were not completely out. He pulled her onto his lap then, and kissed her, and she let him, and the next thing she knew, he was gently taking her clothes off, and she was aching for him, as she had before. They ended up on the couch in his office, making love, he cried through most of it, and begged her forgiveness, and told her how much he loved her, and afterward, she held him like a child to her breast.

“Swear to me you’ll never do anything like it again,” she said in a choked voice.

“I swear,” he said, and appeared to be sincere. She knew she was taking a terrible chance, but she told him he could come home. She had held out for almost two months, and filled out the papers for a divorce, but she agreed to give him one more chance. He knew she meant it, and he swore again that he would never betray her. He had learned his lesson. She didn’t tell Leslie that he was back. When she got home from work that night, he was waiting for her, and still afraid of what he would do now, they made love again.

Chapter 10

Nigel was very careful with her once Coco let him back into the house. He was walking on eggshells, and she was hypervigilant. He took her to see the results at the house in Sussex, and it was as beautiful as he said. They still had to furnish it, but everything was done, and the grounds were larger than she remembered.

It took her two weeks to admit to Leslie that she had let him come back. Leslie looked leery about it, but wished her the best. Her business was growing, and Coco had become an important part of it. Their clients loved her, and Coco had discovered that she had a knack for decorating, like her mother. Leslie said she had real talent, and great follow-through. Every client had been satisfied so far.

Two weeks after he moved back in, Nigel begged her to give a Christmas party, to christen their new home. She still felt tentative with him, and she wasn’t feeling festive, but she finally let him talk her into it, as long as they kept it down to fifty or sixty good friends. She didn’t want to give a big showy bash. He was disappointed, but he agreed. They chose the guest list carefully. It was made up of the people they were closest to. It grew to seventy-five easily, but Nigel said that some of them wouldn’t show up.

She turned twenty-four a few days before the Christmas party, and she didn’t want to celebrate her birthday this year either. It was taking her time to feel close to him again, but she was getting there, and was slowly starting to trust him again.

Sam had been worried about her ever since she’d told him that Nigel was back. He thought it was a terrible mistake. In his opinion, Nigel was not going to change.