Katie Fforde - Going Dutch

‘A bit. I think you should just wait until you and Marcus are home. I'm sure you'll find the magic comes back into your relationship.' The thought that she actually could find work as an agony aunt flitted through Jo's mind as this platitude emerged.

‘I don't think there ever was much magic. I think he just wants me because I'm so young and pretty.'

‘Those are not bad things to be,' said Jo, wishing she herself was above wanting to be those things. 'And he wouldn't have done more than take you out to dinner if you were only that.'

‘And I did fancy him rotten. Still do, really.’

Jo didn't reply. A 'me too' from her at this point would not be helpful.

‘But maybe a younger man would be more fun.' Carole rested her chin on her hand, thinking hard.

‘You could have some space on your own. Have fun being single, for a while.'

‘I've never been single,' said Carole, sounding as if this was an achievement.

‘I definitely think you should try it. I'd never been single, either, before my husband did what he did, and although that was absolutely awful, I've had a lot of fun since.' Saying the words out loud made her realise just how true they were.

‘I think I'd feel weird, not having a boyfriend.'

‘You should talk to Dora about this. She was engaged for years-'

‘Engaged? She didn't say she'd been engaged.'

‘Didn't she? Then maybe she didn't want anyone to know, but that's not the point. She had a boyfriend for years and now she's single. I think she's having much more fun.'

‘So she and Tom really aren't an item?’

To Jo's immense relief the kettle chose this moment to boil over and Dora appeared. 'Where's this tea, then?'

‘The kettle's only just boiled,' said Carole, who hadn't got up and wasn't now making the tea. 'So, Dora, you were engaged before, were you?’

Dora shot Jo a horrified glance.

‘I'm sorry, Dora,' said Jo, 'it just slipped out. I was only telling Carole that she should try being single if she splits up with Marcus. You're having fun, aren't you?’

Before Dora could answer Carole went on. 'And then I asked her if you and Tom were an item.’

Jo could have thrown the scalding tea bag at Carole just then. 'Carole, dear, I really don't think you should keep going on about this. A boat trip is not the place to have showdowns. Ed could have died in the sea. Please, let's not have any scenes.'

‘What do you mean?'

‘I mean that you're not to split up with Marcus, you're not to try and ensnare Tom, and just try and fit in with everyone else.'

‘Ensnare? What's that mean?' asked Carole.

‘You know perfectly well what it means!' Jo's temper had finally reached breaking point. 'Now, let's just all behave like adults, stick with the men we came with and don't try and get anyone else's!'

‘You know, Jo,' said Carole thoughtfully, having let this tirade pass her by, 'I came on this trip because I thought Marcus was interested in one of the women. I really don't think it's Dora.' She glanced at Dora to double-check she wasn't her rival. 'Could it possibly be you?’

Jo realised she could either lose her temper completely or burst out laughing. She laughed. 'Carole, if you think a man like Marcus would fancy a woman like me, you must need your bumps felt! Now, take your tea, everyone, I'mgoing to have a nap.' She grabbed a mug and hurried off before anyone could say anything else that would make her want to scream, either with hysteria, or with laughter.

Dora looked at Carole. 'Well, that's us told! Do you want some cake? If not, could you bring some up anyway? I know Tom will want some.'

‘Oh, OK.’

Carole seemed a little surprised at Dora's friendly, down-to-earth attitude. Dora was quite surprised at it too, but she decided it was a good strategy. It would keep everything as normal as possible. Kind and rational Jo was obviously near the end of her tether and she was almost there herself. It was also quaintly British – have a nice cup of tea and everything will be all right.

‘Don't forget your water,' said Dora. 'Or whatever it is you were having.’

When the buoys became more frequent, Tom called down to Marcus who was awake and in the wheelhouse in seconds. Carole and Dora made themselves scarce immediately.

‘Let's go and see what might be for supper, shall we?' suggested Dora. 'Jo's done all the cooking so far. It's exciting to think we'll be eating it tied up against Holland, isn't it?'

‘It would be nicer to eat out, really,' said Carole.

‘There might not be anywhere, then we'd have to start cooking when everyone is starving and bad-tempered. My dad's always grumpy when he's hungry.' She had been about to say 'I expect Marcus is too' but she managed to stop herself in time.

The two girls went down into the galley. Dora opened the fridge to see if Jo had taken anything out to defrost. She hadn't. She opened the freezer and Carole looked over her shoulder at the array of frozen vegetables. 'I could make a salad. I make brilliant salads. I used to have a job doing it.’

‘I don't know if there's much to make salad with,' said Dora peering in.

‘You've got green beans and all sorts. Don't worry. I can make salad with anything.' Carole opened the fridge again. 'Look, there's celery, green peppers, a leek, lots of things in here. Don't worry, it'll be delicious. I'll forget about food combining and put croutons in it.'

‘There are potatoes and carrots and things outside, in the lobby by the bottom of the steps.'

‘Excellent. Marcus isn't big on salad so I don't often make them. This'll be fun!’

If anyone had suggested to Dora that preparing a meal with Carole could possibly be described as fun she would have been totally disbelieving. But it was. Carole started chopping and peeling and grating with huge enthusiasm. The wooden salad bowl was filling up with all sorts of colours, textures and, potentially, flavours.

‘Now, the dressing,' said Carole. 'Has Jo got any decent olive oil?’

Dora handed Carole the bottle. 'I think that it's been pressed by the hands of virgins from trees planted on sacred ground, or whatever.’

Carole laughed. Dora was surprised. 'You're really into this, aren't you?' she said.

‘Yes I am, and I suddenly feel a lot more cheerful. I've been quite depressed recently but I've started taking some new supplements and I think they've just kicked in.'

‘Oh, right.'

‘Or it could be that I've decided that Marcus and I are history. I'll have to find somewhere else to live, of course, but that'll be OK. I won't go until I've got that sorted.'

‘You won't dump him until you get home though, will you? Imagine the upset!'

‘That's what Jo said, but I think once you've made a decision you should act on it.’

Dora chewed her lip. Carole had suddenly become incredibly proactive and while it was brilliant in lots of ways, the thought of a sulking – or, worse, heartbroken -Marcus at mealtimes was dreadful. 'We don't want Marcus being all miserable though. We need him, for one thing, and for another, he takes up quite a big space as it is. If he was surrounded by a black cloud of despair there'd be no room for the rest of us.'

‘What on earth are you talking about?'

‘Heartbreak takes up a lot of space, trust me. When I finally broke up with John after about a hundred years, I had to leave the village. There just wasn't space for me and his broken heart in it.'

‘Oh, wow,' said Carole, looking up from her chopping. 'And if you think how small a boat is, even a big one like this, well – nightmare.'

‘I suppose..

‘And where would you sleep? There isn't anywhere else.’

‘Couldn't I share with you?'

‘No,' said Dora firmly. 'I don't have any problems with sharing a bed with women but mine isn't very big. So please don't say anything to Marcus until you're home!'