Katie Fforde - Wedding Season

‘So what about Carrie's dress? That's the really important thing.'

‘It's going OK, I think. The toile fitted beautifully and she didn't want too much changed, thank goodness. I think she's finally caught on to the fact that there's a bit of a rush on and it won't get done unless she sticks to the plan. She does want a huge stand-up ruff, like in the pictures of Queen Elizabeth the First. I've got some little tiny stones for that.'

‘Phew,' said Sarah. 'You're a star. Now, Bron, what about the cake?'

‘Well, we finally managed to work out a really quick way of doing the fake ones.'

‘We? Is that the cooking ladies, too?’

Bron shook her head. 'James.'

‘That sounded a bit soulful!' said Elsa, who knew all about Bron's frustrations over James. They'd discussed it quite a bit recently, over cups of supportive mid-work tea.

‘Well, I've given all the signals I can and he hasn't picked up on them. Just as well I'm so busy I can hardly even think about him.' As Bron said this she knew that it didn't matter how busy she was, she still spent a lot of time thinking about James.

Sensing Bron didn't really want to talk about it, Sarah said, 'So, have you heard from Laurence, Elsa?’

Elsa sighed. 'He's working abroad at the moment and he's really busy too, and so can't ring me all that often. It's lovely when he does, though. And he sends sweet texts. Mind you, I haven't had one for a while…' Her doubts crept in again.

‘I've put him on the list as your partner,' said Sarah. 'I can take him off if you want.'

‘No, I'd love him to come to the wedding, but I don't think he'll be back in time.'

‘Oh well, his place is open,' said Sarah. 'You're very sweet together.’

After Elsa had denied and then accepted that she and Laurence did seem suited, she said, 'He'll probably come back and not like me after all. It's always a mistake to have sex too early on in the relationship. What?’

Bron and Sarah were laughing. 'I don't think that's a mistake you've made often, Elsa,' said Sarah. 'And anyway, I don't think you need to worry about Laurence. He's obviously smitten. Although he'd better be careful, you're looking particularly hot tonight, if I may say so.’

Elsa pulled at her dress. 'Do you like it? I've got really into red since I had my colours done. Whilst we're on the subject of men, what about you and Hugo, Sarah?' she went on deftly, still preferring not to be the centre of attention if she could avoid it. 'What was that about him taking a picture of you and putting it in an exhibition?'

‘It was lovely. He made me look – well – beautiful.'

‘You are beautiful,' said Elsa promptly.

‘Hm,' said Sarah, 'but you're looking at my beautiful soul.'

‘No!' Elsa contradicted.

‘Well, Hugo wasn't, for sure,' said Bron.

‘What do you mean? He takes pictures of everyone – it doesn't mean a thing,' said Sarah.

‘Come on, I noticed the way you stare at him when you think no one's looking. You do like him, don't you?' asked Bron.

‘Of course I like him! He's Hugo! Everyone likes him!'

‘I didn't mean it like that,' said Bron. 'And you know it.' She smiled. 'Has the cool, calm and collected but cynical wedding planner to the stars finally succumbed..

Sarah blushed. 'Don't be silly. He is attractive, there's no denying it but…' She didn't want to tell the girls he was spoken for. It would involve too much painful interrogation. 'Until this wedding – both weddings – are over, I haven't time to think about Hugo.'

‘But you do really like him, don't you?' persisted Elsa.

Sarah let out a big sigh. 'You don't give up, either of you! All right. Yes, I do, but it's not to be – it's all too complicated, believe me. Anyway, let's not talk about me. This is Lily's night.'

‘But Lily's not here yet,' Elsa pointed out.

‘It's still her night,' said Sarah firmly.

‘Hm,' said Bron. She didn't want to push Sarah too far, not tonight at least. 'So, what's the plan for this evening?'

‘I don't know much at all,' said Sarah. 'Lily said she didn't want me to have anything to do with it. One of her friends has done it all, including hiring this limo. I do hope she's going to pay for it – we don't want to have a frantic whip-round at two in the morning. Actually' – she lowered her voice conspiratorially – 'I'm going to try and slip away a bit early. I'm sure Lily doesn't want her big sister cramping her style.'

‘Well, I don't want to be up late,' said Elsa. 'I get up really early these days.'

‘Oh,' said Bron. 'I was looking forward to a girls' night out.'

‘Well, maybe we should have one then,' said Sarah unexpectedly. 'Maybe we should go on the pull.’

The thought of sensible, well-organised Sarah going on the pull made the others giggle rather more than necessary, Sarah thought as the car pulled up to the kerb in front of the first bar.

‘Hiya! So you're Lily's big sister!’

The girl on the pavement confronting her was wearing white leather shorts, long white boots, a fringed jacket and a cowboy hat. Lily and her two other friends were dressed in the same way. Lily had various extras – L-plates, garters and feather sex toys – draped round her neck. Sarah did her best to smile.

‘That's right!' she said.

‘Lily says you can be a bit of a spoilsport, but you won't on her hen night, will you?'

‘Of course not! Whatever gave you that impression?’

Lily was examining her French manicure. Her shorts were pulled tight over her belly and Sarah thought she looked a bit deranged.

‘Well, I'm in charge,' said Lily's chief bridesmaid, who was called Charlene. 'And we're going to have a great time. Aren't we, girls?’

Everyone cheered – Elsa and Bron very quietly. Sarah could tell they wanted to go home too.

`So, where do we start?' said Sarah, faking enthusiasm for Britain. 'I'll get the first round in! Which bar are we going to?'

‘Let's have one here first,' said Bron.

‘Not so fast,' said Charlene. 'We can't just go drinking whenever we want. We have to play the game. Lots of games, really.'

‘Oh, come on, Charles,' said another of Lily's friends. 'You can't expect us to go paying forfeits and stuff without a few glasses of wine or a cocktail or two first! It's unreasonable.’

Sarah bit her tongue to stop herself reminding everyone that Lily was pregnant and shouldn't be drinking at all.

‘We're going to a club,' said Charlene. 'It's all arranged. We just have to get past the doormen.' She glanced at Bron, Elsa and Sarah, hinting that they were either inappropriately dressed for a hen night or just too old and unattractive.

It took them a little time to file into the club and the doormen seemed to check out the credentials of the girls for a lot longer than necessary. It took Sarah even longer to make her way to the bar but she persevered – all thought of spending the evening drinking mineral water or non alcoholic cocktails had vanished. She needed at least one drink to get through this.

She realised when she finally got back to the table with the drinks that Lily's friends were already fairly well tanked up. 'Here we go, girls.' She handed Bron and Elsa their drinks. 'We might as well get drunk. It's the only way we're going to get through this.'

‘OK,' said Charlene, unaware of any dissent among her audience. 'Here's what Lily has to do!’

There was a cry of 'Whoa' and everyone took a sip from their glasses.

‘First on the list…' She looked around at her audience, claiming everyone's attention. 'She has to kiss a stag.'

‘Maybe we should ring the RSPCA,' whispered Bron to Sarah.

‘A proper snog, mind, not just a kiss on the cheek.' Charlene was insistent. 'She has to collect three items of clothing from three different men; get a massage – it canjust be shoulders, we don't want anyone stripping off.’