Leslie Moore - Griffin's Destiny

Ashinji raised the bowl to his mouth then drank, wincing a little as the salty broth stung his injured lip. Sen remained silent while his son ate.

After he had sipped the last drops from the bowl and set it aside, Ashinji dared to look into his father’s eyes. He saw the unconditional love and acceptance for him that had always been there, but he also saw his father’s sadness and bewilderment.

“Do our people know about Sadaiyo?”

“Yes, Son, they do.” The pain Ashinji heard in his father’s voice stung his heart. He knew telling his father the whole story would be one of the hardest things he would ever have to do.

The words came haltingly at first, but once started, they flowed more easily. He left nothing out, and after he had finished, he lowered his head and wept. Sen embraced and rocked him, just as he had done when Ashinji had been a boy, soothing his childish hurts as only a father could.

Except that these hurts will never fade completely.

After a while, Sen spoke. “That you survived to return to me is truly a miracle for which I can never offer up enough thanks,” he murmured. “I don’t deserve the Goddess’ blessings, not after what I’ve done.”

Ashinji pulled away from his father in surprise. “What do you mean, Father? You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Yes, Ashi, I have,” Sen insisted. “I refused to admit my behavior toward your brother was unfair, that it caused him great pain, and in turn, I refused to see how he punished you for my transgressions. I tried to love Sadaiyo as I loved you, Ashi, but…Goddess help me, I just couldn’t! I knew from the moment I first held you in my arms that we would share a special bond, you and I. I could never explain it-still can’t-but it’s there, and it’s stronger than ever.”

“I said this to Mother and I’ll say it again to you, Father. You and she mustn’t blame yourselves for what Sadaiyo did to me,” Ashinji replied.

Sen sighed, blinking back tears. “I just hope your brother has found some peace at last.”

“Father, what happened during the battle in front of Tono Castle? How did we manage to defeat the Soldarans? We were so badly outnumbered.”

Sen shook his head. “It’s hard to believe it, even now…’twas like nothing any of us had ever seen, Son. A miracle, many are saying.”

“A miracle? What do you mean?”

“Well, what would you call a pillar of fire pouring down from the sky? It blasted away half their army in the blink of an eye! Turned ’em to ash, just like that! Hurt a lot of our own people as well, so every miracle has its price, I s’pose. The Goddess has to dole out a little hurt for so much good fortune.”

So that’s what it looked like , Ashinji thought. He gripped the edge of the cot and stared into Sen’s face. “Father, there’s a lot more I have to tell you.”

Sen’s eyes widened. “About what, Son?”

“About that miracle. About what really happened. A lot of it has to do with Jelena.”

“Jelena?”

“Father, Jelena is dead, and I killed her.”

Ashinji felt no surprise to learn that his father already knew most of the major details of the Kirians’ plan. Sen and Amara had always told each other everything.

“Your mother swore me to secrecy. I had to lie to Keizo, my friend and my king. Goddess’ tits, but that was hard. She promised me the Kirians had everything in hand, that the plan would succeed…She left out the part about having to kill Jelena, though.” Sen scowled, and seeing his father’s anger, Ashinji laid a hand on his forearm.

“Please don’t be angry with Mother. She hoped with all her heart the Kirians could find a way to accomplish their task without…without killing Jelena, but in the end, they could not.”

“I wish they’d left you out of it, Son. You shouldn’t have had to do what they asked of you. It wasn’t fair.”

“They had no one else. If I hadn’t agreed, then none of us would have survived.”

Father and son gazed at each other without speaking for a few heartbeats. Ashinji broke the silence first.

“Father, you knew about my Talent, didn’t you?”

Sen looked away. “I’m sorry, Ashi,” he murmured. “Your mother knew, even before you were born, how strong your Talent was. She and I both agreed…we felt it would be easier on you if she blocked your magic. That way, it wouldn’t be so hard for you to accept what our tradition decreed for you, that as a second-born child of my House, your life was pledged to the king’s service.”

Ashinji remembered how much anger he had felt toward his mother when she had admitted what she had done.

There’s no anger left in me for any of this now. I’ve lost too much to waste time being angry.

“I always knew a soldier’s life wasn’t what you wanted, Son,” Sen continued, “but you never complained. You did what was expected of you, and now…” Sen cradled Ashinji’s bruised face between his hands. “You are my Heir now, Ashi,” he whispered.

Ashinji lowered his head, unable to look his father in the eyes. “No matter how I felt about my brother, I never wanted him dead.”

“I know,” Sen replied. He let his hands slip down to Ashinji’s shoulders, gave them a squeeze, then dabbed his leaking eyes on his sleeve. His melancholy expression brightened a little.

“Now that you’ve recovered enough to travel, I’m ordering this division back to Tono Castle today. We should be on the road to Sendai within the week. I’ll send in Kamiro with some clothes for you.” Sen rose to his feet, pushed aside the curtain and left.

Ashinji lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. A hodgepodge of aches plagued his body, but nothing so severe that it would prevent him from walking, or even riding when he had to.

After assuring himself his body could function, albeit in a diminished capacity, he turned his mind to the task of assessing the state of his Talent. The energy fueling his magic had begun to replenish itself, but it had yet to reach full strength; even so, he decided to reach out with his mind to try to search for the familiar thread of energy that had bound him and Jelena together.

He sensed nothing.

Maybe I’m still too weak , he thought. He couldn’t bring himself to admit the other possibility.

Kamiro bustled in, bringing a fresh set of clothes. “May I assist you, my lord?” the valet offered.

Ashinji opened his eyes. “No thank you, Kamiro. I think I can manage,” he replied. The valet bowed, placed the clothing on the cot, bowed again, then departed.

Dressing himself proved to be a little more difficult and painful than Ashinji had anticipated. A mass of bruises covered his torso where Sadaiyo had pummeled him, and it hurt to raise his arms. After pulling on a pair of sandals then raking his fingers through his disheveled hair, he stepped out of the tent into the late afternoon sunshine.

A ragged chorus of cheers greeted him, causing him to start in surprise. A large group of Kerala soldiers stood before the tent, just as Sen had said.

Aneko stood at the forefront. “On behalf of all of the Kerala troops, I want to welcome you back, my lord,” she said, grinning.

Ashinji scanned the faces before him, seeing a new, deeper level of devotion in each one. Until this moment, he had given no thought to the full measure of profound change Sadaiyo’s death had wrought upon his life and future. He had no choice but to face it now.

It’s true. I really am the future Lord of Kerala.

Aneko stepped forward. “I’m very sorry for your loss, my lord. We all are,” she said, then added in a low voice, “For the first time, though, I feel confident about Kerala’s future. I apologize if my words offend you, my lord, but it’s true and I know all my comrades feel the same.” She glanced over her shoulder at the assembled troops.