Adam Johnson - The Orphan Master's Son

Citizens, when last we saw the beauty Sun Moon, she had closed herself off. Our poor actress was handling her loss badly. Why won’t she turn to the inspirational tracts of the Dear Leader? Kim Jong Il is someone who understands what you’re going through. Losing his brother when he was seven, his mother after that, and then a baby sister a year later, not to mention a couple of stepmothers—yes, the Dear Leader is someone who speaks the language of loss.

Still, Sun Moon did understand the role of reverence in a good citizen’s life, so she packed a picnic lunch to take to the Revolutionary Martyrs’ Cemetery, just a short walk from her house on Mount Taesong. Once there, her family spread a cloth on the ground, where they could relax at their meal, knowing Taepodong-II missiles stood at the ready, while high above, North Korea’s BrightStar satellite defended them from space.

The meal, of course, was bulgogi , and Sun Moon had prepared all manner of banchan to accompany the feast, including some gui , jjim , jeon , and namul . They thanked the Dear Leader for their bounty and dug in!

As he ate, Commander Ga asked about her parents. “Do they live here in the capital?”

“It’s just my mother,” Sun Moon said. “She retired to Wonsan, but I never hear from her.”

Commander Ga nodded. “Yes,” he said, “Wonsan.”

He stared off into the cemetery, no doubt thinking of all the golf and karaoke to be found in that glorious retirement community.

“You’ve been there?” she asked.

“No, but I’ve seen it from the sea.”

“Is it beautiful, Wonsan?”

The children were fast at their chopsticks. Birds eyed them from the trees.

“Well,” he said, “I can say the sand is especially white. And the waves are quite blue.”

She nodded. “I’m sure,” she said. “But why, why doesn’t she write?”

“Have you written her?”

“She never sent me her address.”

Commander Ga certainly knew that Sun Moon’s mother was having too much fun to write. No other nation on earth has an entire city, right on the beach, dedicated to the comfort of its retired persons. Here, there is surf casting, watercolor, handicrafts, and a Juche book club. Too many activities to name! And Ga also knew that if more citizens volunteered at the Central Postal Bureau in their evenings and weekends, less mail would be lost in transit across our glorious nation.

“Stop worrying about your mother,” he told her. “It’s the young ones you should focus on.”

After lunch, they spilled the leftover food into the grass for the cute little birds to eat. Then Ga decided the children needed some education. He took them to the top of the hill, and while Sun Moon looked on with pride, the good Commander indicated the most important martyr in the cemetery, Kim Jong Suk, wife of Kim Il Sung and mother of Kim Jong Il. The busts of all the martyrs were larger-than-life bronzes whose burnished hues seemed to bring their subjects to life. Ga explained at length Kim Jong Suk’s anti-Japanese heroics and how she was kindly known for carrying the heavy packs of older revolutionary guerrillas. The children wept that she died so young.

Then they walked a few meters to the next martyrs, Kim Chaek, An Kil, Kang Kon, Ryu Kyong Su, Jo Jong Chol, and Choe Chun Guk, all patriots of the highest order who fought at the Great Leader’s side. Then Commander Ga pointed out the tomb of the hot-blooded O Jung Hup, commander of the famed Seventh Regiment. Next was the eternal sentinel Cha Kwang Su, who froze to death during a night watch at Lake Chon. The children rejoiced in their new understandings. And here was Pak Jun Do, who took his own life in a test of loyalty to our leaders. Don’t forget Back Hak Lim, who earned his nickname Eagle Owl one imperialist at a time. Who hadn’t heard of Un Bo Song, who’d packed his ears with earth before charging a Japanese gun emplacement? More , the children called, more! Thus they walked the rows, taking note of Kong Young, Kim Chul Joo, Choe Kwang, and O Paek Ryong, all too heroic for medals. Ahead was Choe Tong O, father of South Korean commander Choe Tok Sin, who defected to North Korea in order to pay his respects here. And here is Choe Tong O’s brother by marriage Ryu Tong Yol! Next was the bust of tunnel master Ryang Se Bong and the assassination trio of Jong Jun Thaek, Kang Yong Chang, and “the Sportsman” Pak Yong Sun. Many Japanese orphans still feel the burn of Kim Jong Thae’s long patriotic shadow.

Such education was the kind that brought milk to women’s breasts!

Sun Moon’s skin was flush, so nakedly had Commander Ga aroused her patriotism.

“Children,” she called. “Go play in the woods.”

Then she took the arm of Commander Ga and led him downhill to the botanical gardens. They passed the experimental farm, with its tall corn and bursting soybeans, the guards with their chrome Kalashnikovs ever at the ready to defend the national seed bank against imperial aggression.

She paused before what is perhaps our greatest national treasure, the twin greenhouses that exclusively cultivate kimjongilia and kimilsungia.

“Pick your hothouse,” she told him.

The buildings were translucent white. One glowed with the full fuchsia of kimjongilia. The breeding house of kimilsungia radiated an operatic overload of lavender orchid.

It was clear she couldn’t wait. “I choose Kim Il Sung,” Sun Moon said. “For he is the progenitor of our entire nation.”

Inside, the air was warm, humid. A mist hung. As this husband and wife strolled the rows arm in arm, the plants seemed to take notice—their swiveling blossoms followed in our lovers’ wake, as if to drink in the full flavor of Sun Moon’s honor and modesty. The couple stopped, deep in the hothouse, to recumbently enjoy the splendor of North Korea’s leadership. An army of hummingbirds hovered above them, expert pollinators of the state, the buzzing thrum of their wing beats penetrating the souls of our lovers, all the while dazzling them with the iridescent flash of their throats and the way their long flower-kissing tongues flicked in delight. Around Sun Moon, blossoms opened, the petals spreading wide to reveal hidden pollen pots. Commander Ga dripped with sweat, and in his honor, groping stamens emanated their scent in clouds of sweet spoor that coated our lovers’ bodies with the sticky seed of socialism. Sun Moon offered her Juche to him, and he gave her all he had of Songun policy. At length, in depth, their spirited exchange culminated in a mutual exclaim of Party understanding. Suddenly, all the plants in the hothouse shuddered and dropped their blossoms, leaving a blanket upon which Sun Moon could recline as a field of butterflies ticklishly alighted upon her innocent skin.

Finally, citizens, Sun Moon has shared her convictions with her husband!

Savor the glow, citizens, for in the next installment, we take a closer look at this “Commander Ga.” Though he is remarkable at satisfying the political needs of a woman, we will look closely at the ways in which he has defiled all seven tenets of North Korean Good Citizenship.

SUN MOON announced that the day to honor her great-uncle was upon them. Even though it was Saturday, a workday, they’d make the walk to the Revolutionary Martyrs’ Cemetery to lay a wreath. “We’ll make it a picnic,” Commander Ga told her. “And I’ll cook my favorite meal.”

Ga had refused to let any of them eat breakfast. “An empty stomach,” he told them, “is my secret ingredient.” For the picnic, Ga brought only a pot, some salt, and Brando on a lead.

Sun Moon shook her head at the sight of the dog. “He’s not legal,” she said.