Ali Smith: There But For The

The fact is, a mystery clock is an old-fashioned sort of clock that seems to go by itself on its own without seemingly needing any winding or ever being looked after by anyone. Mr. Garth read it out loud off the piece of paper. Yes, that’s a good one, he said, thank you. Thank you for sending me all the facts over the weeks, I wondered who it was that was being so kind as to think I would want to know things. I thought that you would need to, while you were in here, Brooke said, in case you were a bit bored. It’s like a newspaper getting delivered, but better, Mr. Garth said. I appreciate the time it took to find the facts and write them down for me. That’s all right, Brooke said, it didn’t take very long. It’s what I like about handwriting, Mr. Garth said, that it is about time. How do you mean? Brooke said. Well, Mr. Garth said, it takes time to write things down, put one word after another. And also, the letters you sent me are in your handwriting, which is like sending me an exclusive artefact that nobody but you could have made, so, thank you. That’s quite cool! Brooke said. Though there’s one fact in particular I did want to ask about, Mr. Garth said. Mr. Garth got off the bike and went over to the chest of drawers thing and looked through the pile of The fact is notes and held one up. This one, he said, The fact is, deer know about weddings and about who you will marry. I’m pretty sure it is a fact, Brooke said, it’s what it says in that song. What song? Mr. Garth asked. The one about knowing where you’re going, Brooke said. I don’t think I know that song, Mr. Garth said. Brooke sang it for him: I know where I’m going. I know who’s going with me. I know who my love is. And the deer knows who I’ll marry. Mr. Garth started laughing. No no, I’m not laughing at you, he said in the middle of the laughing, you sang it really beautifully. It’s just the thought, the thought of a herd of deer standing on a hillside knowing who we’ll marry. He laughed a bit more then he wiped at his eyes. Oh dear, he said. Oh God. You’ve actually been in here for a very long time, Brooke said. It’s very small for such a long time, do you not want to come out of here? Could I? Mr. Garth said. I don’t see why not, Brooke said, I mean, I think so. What I mean is, it’s not as if there’s very much a person can do to keep himself or herself occupied in here. Oh, I don’t know, I’ve been pretty busy, Mr. Garth said and he showed her how many miles he’d done on the exercise bike speedo, which said 3,015.78 miles, so that meant nearly 3,016. Yes but this bike was in the room before you came into it and there must have been some mileage on it already, Brooke said. I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, Mr. Garth said, there were six and a half miles on it when I first sat on its seat, I cannot tell a lie. Then Brooke said, that’s funny, you’ve done all those miles, and Miles is also your first name, Miles by name and miles by nature! It’s true, Mr. Garth said. His cuffs were frayed and there was a tear in his shirt at the hem. I’m a vegetarian too now, Brooke said so he wouldn’t think she was judging him for his clothes being a bit torn, because she was pretty sure he noticed her seeing that they were. Then she asked him if he would like a cup of tea. I would really like that, he said, I haven’t had a cup of tea in months. Do you want to come down to the kitchen while I make you one? Brooke said but he said no, I’ll just stay here if you don’t mind, but thank you. Will I shut the door? she said and he said yes please. But when she came to the top of the stairs with the mug of tea he’d opened the door again by himself and he was actually standing in the open doorway, he was actually almost in the hall. He was looking a bit tired. Behind him she could hear all the noise of the people outside. It sounded funny in the stairwell now that the door was open. They went back into the room and Mr. Garth just kind of stood with his arms at his sides. Brooke said, will I shut the door again? and Mr. Garth nodded. Then he sat on the bike again and held his tea in his hands with his arms on the handlebars and Brooke sat on the floor and told him about the time she and her mother and father had gone to Greece and stayed in a hotel apartment place on an island and about how the old man whose family owned the apartment place would always sit outside right next to the main road all day on a white plastic chair, and that he always said hello when they went past to town and came back from town. But this one day we went out in the morning, Brooke said, there was this dead dog in the road that had been hit by a car, and it was quite a big dog. And the man was sitting there watching the road, only now it was as if he was watching the dead dog just lying in the road right in front of him. So he maybe even saw the dog get hit, but now he was just sitting and watching, I mean, why would he not take the dog off the road and put it at the side, even, so it wouldn’t keep getting hit? Because when we came back from the town and from going to the supermarket the dog was flattened right into the road in some parts of it like its legs and tail. It is weird what people do. Yes, Mr. Garth said. It’s very mysterious. Mr. Garth spoke very slowly. I mean, I know the dog was obviously already dead anyway, duh, Brooke said, but it is kind of horrible to think of it getting run over and over again by all the other cars all day. And what if it was a dog he knew? I don’t mean his own dog, I mean like if it was a dog he had patted or that he knew the name of? Mr. Garth nodded and shrugged. He took a sip out of the mug and he flinched. Oh! I forgot if you wanted sugar, Brooke said and jumped up to go and get some from downstairs. I don’t, but thank you very much indeed, Mr. Garth said, it is really kind of you, but I think I was just surprised at it being hot. Brooke sat down on the floor again. Am I talking too much, she said, because I have been known before now to talk too much? No, Mr. Garth said. Please keep talking to me. Okay, Brooke said. Sometimes I have this dream, do you ever have the dreams that mean that you don’t know whether you’re asleep or awake in them? Yes, Mr. Garth said. I often have dreams like that, tell me your dream. Are you sure? Brooke said, because sometimes it can be very boring to listen to people’s dreams, at least that is what my mother tells my father at breakfast sometimes. I’m not bored, Mr. Garth said, and I will tell you if I am. Okay, well, there’s this dream, I had it like weeks ago, like it was ages ago back when I was only just nine, Brooke said, it’s a historic kind of dream, and there is a boy in it and it is back in history except I am there too, and he is the same age as me. He is dressed in torn clothes, much much more torn than yours are and much dirtier like he is a very poor person from the past, and he is standing like with a crowd behind him, like the crowd outside your window kind of except in historic clothes, and behind the crowd, what the crowd are all looking at, there is like a stage with a tall post with a rope on the end of it and the rope has a noose on the end. And then the boy comes up to me and he holds up a loaf of bread and he says, look, and he points over his shoulder at the crowd and he says, they’re going to execute me to death because I stole this, and he holds up the loaf. I was hungry and I took it, he says, and now look, it is not fair that this is happening. Then I woke up, and then I couldn’t get back to sleep, do you ever have that kind of dream? Not exactly the same, but I think that’s a very healthy dream, Mr. Garth said. Do you? Brooke said, because I mean when I woke up I knew it had happened, and if it was real it had happened way back in history and there wasn’t anything I could do, and even if it hadn’t happened in reality and was only happening in my dream I still couldn’t stop it from happening. I think, Mr. Garth said, that the boy in your dream simply wanted you to agree with him that what was happening wasn’t fair. It really really wasn’t, Brooke said. No, Mr. Garth said, it wasn’t. Then he said, that was a very clever dream you had. Yes, Brooke said, but maybe is it too clever? No, Mr. Garth said, not at all, there’s no such thing as too clever anyway. Brooke looked round the room and wondered if maybe it would be a good place to come on the days when she didn’t go to school. Then she asked Mr. Garth did he really think there wasn’t anything wrong with being cleverest. Top of Mount Cleverest, Mr. Garth said. Brooke laughed. Then Mr. Garth said really slowly: