Marion Kummerow - From the Ashes

“Do you want some more wine?” Werner asked her, his handsome face close to hers.

She nodded, inhaling his fresh scent, itching to reach out her fingers and let them glide across the shaven face.

As the evening progressed, he paid the bill and then said to her, “Come with me, I want to show you something.”

Marlene was slightly tipsy with the bottle of wine they’d shared and all the attention she’d received. It was slightly chilly outside, but Werner put his arm around her shoulders and his nearness gave her warmth.

They walked to a hotel not far from the restaurant and she couldn’t believe it when he stepped inside and told the cheerful receptionist in French, “A room in the name of Private Etoile.”

“Oui, Monsieur,” she smiled, her French even worse than Marlene’s. “We have your booking.”

Werner switched to German. “Thank you, Fräulein. The champagne…”

“Yes, Monsieur Etoile, it has been delivered to your room just as you ordered,” the receptionist said. Apparently, she was used to French soldiers coming here to spend the night with their German Fräuleins.

Marlene couldn’t stop wondering. No questions asked, no ID cards required. It was almost as if the hotel owner preferred not to know about the guests. Suddenly her heart pounded in her chest. It was absolutely inappropriate to be alone with Werner in a hotel room this late at night and any decent girl should leave right now.

But she didn’t. In truth, she had yearned for month to go further than exchanging a few stolen kisses here and there. She longed to be alone with him and feel his body pressed against hers. To savor his kisses and explore how it felt to lie together. As soon as he locked the door behind them, they fell into each other’s arms.

“I’ve wanted to do this for months, my darling,” Werner said as he rained kisses all over her face.

“Me, too,” Marled murmured, but all of her words and thoughts ceased to exist the moment his lips touched hers. She was thrown into the sheer magic of love. There was no need for words to express their feelings. Not the good ones and certainly not the bad ones. His kisses were a promise of a bright future, where they could be together forever.

Their first night together was exquisite. Werner was a wonderful lover and she responded passionately to his touch. By the early hours of the morning the champagne bottle was empty and the couple exhausted. Drunk on love, Marlene fell into a deep sleep.

She woke in the morning, surprised to find herself alone in the room. She rolled over to Werner’s side of the bed, but it was cold. Then her gaze fell on the note lying on the nightstand.

“I realize now that passion is not love. It’s not going to work out between us, we are too different people,” the note said. “Please don’t try to contact me again. This is for both our sakes.”

Anger took over and she imagined strangling him after scratching out his eyes. The money he’d left for her on the nightstand made her feel used and dirty. It tainted the wonderful experience of the previous night.

“What a fool I’ve been. How dare you treat me like this?” she shouted at the walls that discretely kept their silence.

The chimes of a nearby clock tower reminded her of the time, and she jumped up and frantically got dressed. Her parents must be worried, wondering where she’d been all night. Her parents!

Sheer panic crept up her spine. If her father knew what she’d done, he’d beat her to a pulp. She needed to come up with an alibi, and quick. Bruni – no that wouldn’t work since her father despised the singer for her lose morals. Dr. Ebert – no, she didn’t want him to lie for her. Zara! Yes, Zara lived nearby in the French sector and despite her father’s newfound hate for Zara’s father, she was still an acceptable character witness.

She rounded the corner into Zara’s street the moment her friend left her house.

“Hey Zara!”

“Hey Marlene. What are you doing here this early in the morning?” Zara hugged her.

“I need to ask you a favor. I… can you… in case my parents ask…” Marlene felt her ears burning with shame.

Zara took one scrutinizing look at Marlene’s face and giggled. “You had a secret rendezvous? Let me guess… with Herr Böhm?”

Heat emanated from Marlene’s face, giving away her secret. “It’s not what you think. We broke up.”

“I’m sorry,” Zara said. “So, what am I supposed to do?”

“Just in case my parents ask, will you please tell them I spent the night with you? Because it got late and I was afraid to return home alone?”

“No problem. And hey, if you want to talk…”

“No thanks. We talked. We quit. There’s nothing more to say.” Marlene would not tell even her best friends about the shameful experience of this morning. Nobody would ever find out, and for all she was concerned, Werner Böhm never existed. Traitorous scum. He wasn’t worth shedding a single tear over.

When Marlene got home she found her mother in tears and her father in a furious rage.

“I’m so sorry. It got late and I spent the night at Zara’s place—” she began.

“Thank God you did,” her mother sobbed. “The Markgraf police came for you last night. Why, Marlene? What have you done?”

“You have to resign from the student board. I allowed you to study, not to meddle in politics,” her father shouted.

“I will,” she said half-heartedly. Right now, she had more urgent problems. Shaken to the core, she rushed to Georg’s place. His sister opened the door, visibly distraught when Marlene asked about him.

“He’s not here. He received a call last night to visit Erich over in Kreuzberg and hasn’t returned home since,” his sister said.

The icy hand of deathlike fear squeezed Marlene’s heart and froze the blood in her veins. “Thanks, I’ll get in touch when I find out something,” she told Georg’s sister and turned on her heels.

What now? Check on Julian? Better not, since he lived in the Soviet sector. The abductions usually took place at night, but even in broad daylight, Marlene didn’t feel safe right now. She decided to pay Lotte a visit. Maybe she knew something.

By the time she arrived at Lotte’s apartment, the grapevine had done its work and Lotte frantically wrapped her arms around Marlene, “Thank God, you’re okay.”

“You have heard?” Marlene asked.

“Yes, it’s awful. In total a dozen student leaders, all of them not members of the SED, have disappeared last night. Julian, Georg, Klaus, and Sandra, among them,” Lotte said in a hoarse voice. “We thought, you too.”

Marlene’s feet suddenly gave out under her and Lotte dragged her inside to flop onto the sofa.

“I… I happened to spend the night at Zara’s because it got late…” A thought entered her mind, but the idea was too absurd to even consider it.

“Lucky girl. Looks like you have a resourceful guardian angel,” Lotte said and brought Marlene tea. “Here drink this for the shock. You had better not go home, at least for a few days until the dust has settled.

Marlene nodded in a haze, her brain not really up to the task of processing a rational thought.

“…and don’t go to university either. Don’t enter the Soviet sector.” Lotte looked at her with a sorrowful face. “You know how wicked the Russians are. They never try an accused person, because the moment you’re accused by the party, you’re already guilty, since there’s no room for error. The only thing remaining is to determine your punishment.”

Completely traumatized, Marlene thanked Lotte for her advice and took a bus to the French sector where Bruni lived. The quick-witted and well-connected woman would know what to do.