Susan Paul - The Bride's Portion

“You know nothing of my feelings for my cousin,” he returned coldly. “Barbara is young, I will make certain that she is suitably married. It is you and I who will pay the price for our parents’ misdeeds. I will give up the woman I intended to wed and you will give up your dreams. But you need not fear suffering my advances. I’ll not demand my rights as your husband, and I’ll not force you to remain at Gyer and live a lie. Once the land is legally in my hands you will be free to leave, to return to Wellewyn if you wish, though you must remain my wife. You may live as you please, where you please. You will be made an allowance so that you will never lack for money.”

“You are generous, Alexander of Gyer!” she informed him heatedly. “But if you do this thing, you will be making me your lifelong prisoner, complete, will you not? I may be free to live where I please, but I will still be your prisoner as surely as if I were locked away in that filthy room above stairs. I might as well have stayed at the convent! At least it would have been my choice.”

Alexander made an impatient, irate gesture with his hand. “It is too late to speak of what might have been. We have little choice, either of us, but to accept what is going to be and try to make the best of it. You should be grateful that I’m willing to allow you such freedoms. By all rights, once we are wed, you should be made to live at Gyer, or wherever I please to put you.”

She threw him an angry glare and walked to one of the open windows. “Your kindness overwhelms me, my lord. It is easy for you to speak of what will be. Your life will not change overmuch. You will still have your family, your people. You’ve had a whole lifetime of freedom, already. All I have ever done is dream of it.” Her voice filled with longing. “Now I shall never know it.”

Alexander began to thaw. The sadness in her voice called forth an unwilling response of sympathy in him. He wanted to take her in his arms, comfort her, reassure her that it would not be so bad. He wanted to tell her that he understood how she felt, that he was sorry, that he would take care of her and be gentle with her in every way until she left Gyer. He didn’t seem to be able to find a voice to express these thoughts, however, so he watched in silence as she dropped her head and again fought back tears.

It was a futile struggle and she cried quietly for a minute or two, her shoulders shaking slightly, her hands moving to wipe at her cheeks. And the anger in him continued to melt.

“Lillis—”

“Don’t.” She stopped him. “You have said quite enough, my lord. I thank you. I do not wish to hear more. I understand my circumstances perfectly.” She drew in a shaky breath. “I am a great believer in accepting one’s fate, you know. You could not have picked a better victim for your plan. I’ll not treat you to a fit of hysterics.”

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