Heidi McCahan - The Firefighter's Twins

“Shay, it’s fine. I get it. Not a big deal.”

He held up a hand. “Please, let me finish. Selfishly, I’d like to have supper with you tonight. But it’s chaotic and messy and very little adult conversation will take place.”

Talk about mixed signals. “Is that an invitation? I’m confused.”

Sighing, he scrubbed a hand across the stubble clinging to his jaw.

Her eyes trailed his fingertips, sending her thoughts places they shouldn’t go.

“What I’m trying to say is that evenings with the boys are a struggle. Throw in a meal in a public place and we’re a disaster waiting to happen.”

“Why don’t we order pizza and eat with the boys? If you’re okay with that.” She wanted to clamp her hand over her mouth. Or disappear. Listen to you, inviting yourself to his place.

He mulled it over. “Are you sure you’re up for it?”

“I’m not afraid of two little boys. How bad could it be?”

“Consider yourself warned.” The corners of his mouth twitched.

Sliding her phone from her pocket, she pulled up the number for the only local pizza restaurant. “If I order it now, we could swing by and pick it up on the way.”

Shay hesitated, hovering near the bed of his truck.

She winced. Yep, way too direct. He was probably conjuring up an excuse right this minute.

Shay put his tools away and then circled around to meet her on the passenger side. “I’m going to have to ask you to drive yourself and pick up the pizza. I’ve got to get home. I’m already running late.”

“Right. Absolutely.”

“I wouldn’t be able to drive you home, anyway. The boys will need to go to bed, and I can’t leave them.” He reached over and opened the door for her. “Why don’t I give you a ride to your car?”

“Sure. It’s over at the farm.” She slid into the passenger seat without looking at him, warmth flushing her skin. Could she be any more insensitive to his situation? Of course he couldn’t hang out, lingering around the table and enjoying meaningful conversation. The boys needed him. Depended on him. She only wanted to thank him for helping with the house and giving up precious time with his boys. It wasn’t like she had ulterior motives. A serious relationship with a firefighter wasn’t an option. The agony of Spencer’s passing had taught her to guard her heart. Shay was a teammate, who was striving for a common goal. Nothing more.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Shay dragged a damp cloth across the kitchen table, scrubbing at some honey or jelly or other mysterious sticky substance that refused to budge. Liam and Aiden toddled around in circles, babbling at one another.

A sea of toys spread from one side of the living room to the other. The babysitter had said they’d only been awake for an hour before he got home. So how had they managed to make such a huge mess? He’d had everything picked up before he left to work on the house.

Satisfied with the condition of the table, he turned and tossed the rag into the sink. Aiden cruised into Shay’s path, his chubby bare feet thumping against the floor.

“Hey, buddy.” Shay patted his head then scooted by, checking the clock on his way to the pantry to grab more napkins. Natalie would probably be here soon. It couldn’t take long to order a pizza in Meadow Springs. Someone’s blanket lay in the middle of the floor. He leaned down and scooped it up, draping it over his shoulder as he opened the pantry door. She’d definitely get to see the realities of life with small children.

Doubt pinged through him. What was he doing letting her come over? Yes, she’d offered. But he could’ve declined. Hadn’t he vowed not to be alone with her? In reality, he didn’t want to be alone with the boys tonight. A wave of guilt rushed in. How messed up was that? Napkins in hand, he closed the pantry door and leaned his forehead against it, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Da-da?” Liam called out. Tiny fingers tugged at Shay’s pant leg, reminding him of his first priority.

Shay opened his eyes and glanced down. Liam’s wide-eyed stare made his heart expand. He looped the blanket around Liam’s neck, earning an adorable belly laugh. He surveyed the kitchen one more time. Breakfast and lunch dishes still sat on the counter, next to an empty casserole pan from last night. With a heavy sigh, he turned away. Welcoming Natalie into his world was a bad idea. The boys weren’t ready. He wasn’t ready. His heart, much like his new home, was still in pieces.

A light knock sounded on the door. Too late. Couldn’t back out now.

Aiden beat him there. Standing on tiptoe, he strained to reach the doorknob.

“Hold on. It’s locked.” Shay tucked the napkins under his arm and then turned the dead bolt and swung the door open.

Natalie stood on the porch, holding a large pizza box, her smile chipping away at his concerns. Two friends sharing a pizza. That’s all.

“What’s going on, fellas?”

“Come on in.” Shay stepped back, and Natalie came inside. “Aiden, Liam, this is Miss Natalie. Can you say hello?”

“Eat? Eat?” Liam’s gaze flitted between Shay, Natalie and the pizza box.

Shay chuckled. “Yes. We’re having pizza. Let’s sit down, please.”

Aiden and Liam turned and scrambled toward their booster seats strapped to the kitchen chairs, dancing impatiently for someone to help them.

Natalie stared after them. “I’ve never seen toddlers move so fast.”

“I think they might be hungry. Here, let me put that on the counter.” He reached for the box, his fingers brushing against hers. Warmth flooded through him as her gaze locked with his.

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

He lingered, drinking in the sight of her pink cheeks and tendrils from her ponytail framing her face. How had he not noticed earlier that her shirt made her eyes seem bluer somehow?

“Drinks? Plates?” she prompted him.

“Oh. Yeah. Sure.” He dragged his gaze away and angled his head toward the kitchen. “Cups and plates are in the cabinets above the sink. Please excuse the mess.”

“No judgment here. I can’t keep up with my own chores, and there’s only one of me.”

“Daddy, help.”

Shay abandoned the pizza on the counter and crossed to the table, where the boys struggled to get seated.

“Please? Please?” Liam patted his palm against his chest.

“I know, I’m hungry, too. Give us a minute.” Shay clicked Liam’s belt, securing him into his booster seat.

“Are these okay?” Natalie held up two smaller plates with popular cartoon characters painted on them.

“Mine,” Aiden squealed, stretching both arms toward her.

“No, no.” Liam’s eyes filled with tears.

Shay groaned inside. He’d tried to hide those plates at least twice since he unpacked the kitchen. Mom must have brought them back out. For whatever reason, the boys fought like crazy over who used the red instead of the orange. But he didn’t have the heart to correct Natalie. She was only trying to help.

“I guess that’s a yes.” She set both plates on the counter. “How about drinks?”

“The boys will have milk.” Shay filled two glasses with ice from the dispenser on the refrigerator door. “The options for grown-ups are limited, I’m afraid. Water, sweet tea...there might be a diet soda in here somewhere.”

“Water’s fine. Thank you.” Natalie opened the lid and reached for a slice of pizza.

Shay hesitated, tempted to prompt her to wash her hands. He hated to say something. But he couldn’t risk the boys getting sick or—worse—triggering an allergic reaction.

She stepped away. “Mind if I wash my hands first?”

“Not at all. There’s a restroom in the hallway.” He gestured toward the open door and then carried their water to the table. Aiden and Liam were starting to whine. “We’re coming. Hang in there.”