Merrillee Whren - Montana Match

“Then I need your help.”

“What does this have to do with me?”

Heather grimaced. “My decision affects Brittany, and that’s how this is connected to you.”

Brittany. After the things he’d been thinking about her tonight, uneasiness hit Parker’s gut. “What’s the connection?”

“I’m worried about her. She doesn’t have a permanent job, and I hate to leave her without a roommate. If I take the job, I plan to pay off my portion of the four months we have left on our lease. After that she’d have to pay all the rent by herself, and she can’t afford to do that. I’m not sure whether I should take the job, or how I’m going to tell Brittany if I do.”

“So what does this have to do with me?”

Heather looked down at the floor, not meeting his gaze. “I thought you could ask Brittany whether she’d like to have the nanny position.”

Disquiet crept into Parker’s mind, as he got up from the chair and walked to the window. He stared into the night. Light from the full moon shimmered across the snow. The moon was like a hole in the blackened sky and reminded him of the hole in his heart that nothing seemed to fill—even his little girls. How could he invite Brittany into his troubled life? But he’d already considered it. Heather was asking him to make a decision—one he wasn’t sure he was ready to make, despite the pressing need for a nanny.

Turning from the window, Parker stared at Heather. “She’s an accountant and a financial planner. Why would she consider being a nanny? That’s a big comedown.”

“The way I see it, you two need each other. You need a nanny, and she needs a regular job and a place to live. You can offer her both.”

“This afternoon she mentioned something about moving back to the Spokane area.” Parker shook his head. “Besides, do you think she’d want to live on an isolated ranch? And how could she come live on the ranch when she’s tied down with a lease?”

“I don’t think she’ll move back to Spokane unless she gets a job there.” Heather narrowed her gaze as she appeared to be thinking. “As for the lease, you could pay her portion as part of your job offer.”

Parker let out a harsh breath. “I could do that, but what would she think?”

“You won’t know unless you ask.” Heather shrugged. “Anyway, did you notice how Rose and Jasmine immediately took to Brittany?”

Parker didn’t want to admit that he’d noticed, and he didn’t want this to turn into another disastrous attempt to assist a young woman. Brittany would have to know about his past because he couldn’t offer her the job in good conscience unless he told her about it. He wasn’t sure he was prepared to do that. If he mentioned his reservations to Heather, she’d tell him to get over it, as she did every time she saw him. But somehow he couldn’t let it go. The unfairness constantly ate at him.

“I hope your silence means you’re considering my suggestion.” Heather’s statement interrupted his thoughts.

Hoping to avoid Heather’s scrutiny, Parker looked out the window again. “Have you mentioned the position to her?”

“No. I thought I should talk to you first.”

“Good.” Conflicting thoughts raced through his mind. He wanted to help Heather, and he needed a nanny. So the decision should be easy, but the attraction he had to Brittany complicated the whole thing. “How will she react to my past?”

“I’ve mentioned it.”

Parker’s heart sank. He feared hearing about Brittany’s reaction. “What did you tell her?”

Heather walked over and stood next to him. “She asked about Rose and Jasmine, so I told her about the rumors, about your losing your job and about Sydney’s death.”

“What did she say?”

Heather raised her eyebrows. “She said you were a very compassionate person and immediately believed you were innocent of any wrongdoing.”

“That’s good.” Parker wasn’t sure why he was so relieved.

Heather nodded. “Since you’re going to ask her about the job, I suppose you should know I also told her you were a recluse because of what happened.”

A recluse. No wonder Brittany had imagined him as an old man with a salt-and-pepper beard. “The recluse part’s an overstatement.”

“Not much of one.”

Parker stopped himself before he tried to refute Heather’s claims. Arguing with her would only put more ideas into her head. True, he’d kept to himself and rarely went into town. He didn’t want to deal with the stares or whispered comments when he ran into people he knew—people who used to be his friends and coworkers. He didn’t have anything to say to those people now, especially the ones from church. Why had they been so quick to condemn him? Where had God been in this mess?

Parker didn’t have the answers.

Crossing her arms, Heather stared at him. “Since you seem to have lost your ability to talk, would you like me to run the idea by her?”

Heather’s question rolled around in his mind. “I’ll talk to her.”

“She has great references.” Patting herself on the chest, Heather grinned again. “Me. She’s got experience as a substitute teacher, and she’s terrific with kids, as you witnessed tonight.”

Parker chuckled. “Have you ever thought of going into sales? You’re very convincing.”

“I just know how to make a persuasive argument. I say don’t waste another minute.” Heather pointed to the door. “Get out there and talk to her.”

“You’re not that persuasive. I’m going to sleep on it and see whether it still seems like a good idea in the morning.”

“Hey, nerdly uncle, don’t think too long, or I’ll talk to her myself.”

“Okay, nerdly niece, I’ve been forewarned.” Parker couldn’t help smiling at Heather’s reference to him—a moniker that brightened his mood. They’d been teasing each other this way for years.

“You know you’ve got me beat in the nerd department. I always tell my friends that you’re my mad-scientist uncle.”

Parker turned to look at Heather. “Is that what you’ve told Brittany?”

“So you are worried about what she thinks?” Heather shot him a speculative grin.

Parker shook his head and gave Heather a wry smile. “I think you should go bother someone else.”

“Okay, but while you’re in here by yourself, why don’t you spend a little time talking to God about hiring Brittany?”

Parker frowned. Why did Heather have to bring God into it? He hadn’t helped before, so what reason was there to believe He would be there now? “You know my feelings about that, and they aren’t going to change.”

“I’m still praying for you. And so is the rest of the family.”

Parker knew that was true. Every time he talked with his mother, he heard the same statement. “You always say that.”

“I’m going to keep saying it until you get right with God.”

“I gathered from something Brittany said tonight that she’s a Christian, too.”

Heather nodded. “We attend the same church. That’s how we started sharing an apartment. But don’t let that stop you from talking to her.”

“Your breathing down my neck is the only thing that’ll stop me.”

Heather backed up toward the door. “Okay, I’m out of here, so you can make plans.”

“Thanks.”

As the door closed behind Heather, he sank onto the nearby chair. Brittany seemed like an answer to a prayer, even though he didn’t pray anymore. Was God working on him—pulling him in despite his resistance? Or were his thoughts getting way ahead of reality? Just because he asked her didn’t mean she would accept.

Chapter Four

On Sunday evening, following an afternoon of skiing, Parker sat at the dinner table with his family. Although the sunny day had turned into a clear, cold night, the conversation and laughter around the table warmed Parker’s heart. If he could capture this slice of happiness and take it home, maybe he could put the past behind him. That’s the way he felt every year during this get-together, but the feeling soon faded. He hadn’t learned to let go of the heartache or bitterness associated with his unfair treatment.