Roz Fox - Texas Mum

A few hours later when her flight landed in Lubbock, she was bone weary and champing at the bit to see Nickolas. Delaney retrieved her bags and rummaged in her suitcase for a sweater to ward off a nip of fall in the air. Nick had taken ill in late May, and here it was almost October. Oh, how she hoped he wouldn’t have to spend Halloween in the hospital. But that, too, was probably wishful thinking.

She arrived at the hospital after midnight. Per the hospital rules, she stopped at the main desk to check in. The night registrar knew her well, since she’d been there through Nick’s first bout with cancer, too. “Is everything all right with your son, Dr. Blair?” the woman asked. “Or did you go out for a breath of air before I came on shift?”

“I’ve been out of town for a couple of days, Marge. I know Nick will be asleep, but I promised him I’d come in when my flight arrived. I’ll probably spend the night at his bedside. Tomorrow he’s being transferred to San Antonio.”

The sympathetic clerk shot Delaney a look of concern.

“Nick’s doctor says it’s a positive move,” she assured the woman. At this small hospital, staff became like family.

“Then, that’s good,” the woman said. “Would you like me to have an orderly prepare you a cot?”

“Thanks, but the chair reclines. I don’t want to disturb his roommate.”

A harried-looking man entered the hospital and approached the desk, so Delaney waved and headed for the elevators. She rode up with a couple of tired-looking interns. They got off on the surgical floor. Delaney went up two more floors to the pediatric area, which split off into a variety of wings. She was all too familiar with the cancer ward.

At the nursing station she was again greeted like an old friend. One of Nick’s favorite nurses, a young, dark-haired and cherry-cheeked woman, smiled and handed Delaney a folder. “Dr. Avery said you’d be by quite late. After you check on Nickolas, if you’d like to go to the waiting room, look these over and sign where the doctor put red x’s, we should be able to get his transfer scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. I hate to see him go, but professionally speaking, I hope they can help him make a full recovery.”

“You and me both, Jessie.” Delaney took the folder and tucked it under her arm. Glancing back, she said, “I’ll probably spend what’s left of the night. I’d appreciate it if someone can drop off a blanket.”

The nurse nodded, and Delaney went down the hall. She peeked in, then entered Nick’s room. She was always struck by how small he looked in the bed. One arm was hooked up to a hydration drip, and the other was curled tightly around his stuffed cow. She set the folder and her purse on the chair and riffled her fingers through his dark hair. Last time, chemo had left him nearly bald. This time they were using only radiation. It had other devastating effects, but he hadn’t lost his hair.

Was it her imagination or were his eyelids more translucent and bruised-looking? He seemed thinner, if possible, from when she’d left him. The radiation gave him stomachaches, and on the days he had the treatments, he didn’t eat. Was he wasting away before her eyes? Could Dario reverse it?

“Mommy?” Nickolas barely uttered the word, but his eyes, open now, looked large and dark in the soft glow of light that was always on behind the bed.

She leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Shh. It’s very late, and we don’t want to disturb Henry.”

Nodding, he touched her face. “Did you bring my football shirt?”

“I have it. You can see it in the morning when there’s better light.”

“Okay. Will you stay?”

“Yes. I have to go sign some papers for Dr. Avery, but I’ll stay right here until after you go back to sleep. And I’ll be here when you wake up in the morning.”

He didn’t respond but grasped her hand, forcing her to perch awkwardly on the edge of the recliner. She watched his incredibly long eyelashes as his eyes slowly drifted shut. She loved him so much. Her heart was a lump of lead in her chest. Nick was incredibly trusting, as if he believed her very presence could make him better. If only that were true.

Sitting in the semidarkness amid the clicks, hums and beeps of the equipment monitoring her child’s vital signs, Delaney found herself praying that Dario would show up in San Antonio and his blood would be near enough a match to Nick’s to give their son a chance for a full recovery. So many times of late she had bargained with God for Nick’s life. She didn’t know what she had to give in exchange, but she’d put everything on the table.

Delaney brushed his warm little fingers with her thumb until his hand relaxed and dropped away from hers. Only then did she take the folder and go down to the empty waiting area. As a rule there were always anxious parents or other family members there, sitting in quiet groups, drinking coffee from the large industrial pot. Tonight she didn’t want coffee. But after reading the same paragraph several times without making sense of it, she rose and poured herself a cup. The aroma alone helped her digest the complicated content. She read to the end of the document, then sat and stared into space.

Her signature would permit Dr. Von Claus to place Nick in an experimental program where limited data suggested promise of beefing up his energy. As always there were risks. He might be allergic to the experimental cocktail of meds, for example.

Rising, she went to the sink and dumped what remained of her coffee. She remembered back to the boy her son had been after he’d gone into remission, before the fevers had returned with a vengeance. He’d been a normal, happy-go-lucky kid whose curiosity had seemed boundless. Now he was pale and wan, and intermittent fevers sapped his will to get out of bed.

Yawning, she paced around the table and massaged tight knots in her shoulders. If only she had family with whom to bat around the pros and cons of this offer. She hesitated to call it an opportunity, because all results from the study weren’t rosy.

Did she trust Dr. Von Claus and Dr. Avery? Without answering her own question, she picked up a pen and scribbled her name beside the red x’s. As a veterinarian there were times she’d given advice based on her gut instinct and sketchy evidence. Closing the folder, she took it back to Nurse Jessie. Then she took the thin blanket the nurse had scrounged up and hurried back to Nick’s room where she relaxed as best she could in the recliner.

* * *

A CRESCENT MOON and a few stars still adorned the lavender early morning sky when Dario exited the hacienda and tossed two suitcases into the back of his Range Rover. He was flying off to Texas, and he hadn’t slept much over the past several nights. His ears still rang from the daily battles with his father and his older brother, who also thought he ruled the roost now. Lorenzo had bowed out of the squabbles shortly after Delaney’s visit.

Dario thought about how much he disliked arguments, unlike the other hotheaded men in the Sanchez family. He’d tried to reason with them, then cajole them. He’d appealed to their sense of duty. Nothing swayed the old man or Vicente. During last night’s fracas at dinner, his father had threatened to have Benito Molina, the estancia attorney, strike Dario’s share in the hacienda and the business. Then Maria Sofia had waded in, demanding to know why she didn’t get an equal share of the family holdings, which opened a whole other debate. The three sons knew, of course, that su padre believed women should be taken care of by their father, brothers or husbands. Their little sister had her own strong views on that.

Hoping he could put the whole mess behind him while in Texas, Dario fastened his seat belt and thrust the key into the ignition. All at once the rear passenger door opened, and he saw a bag or two tossed in before the door slammed and he was plunged into darkness. Then the front passenger door opened, and Maria Sofia climbed in.