Carolyne Aarsen - A Heart's Refuge

“Good morning, Rick,” Becky said, catching his attention. He turned to them and for a moment Becky saw a flicker of an unknown emotion in his blue eyes. Relief? Disappointment?

“Welcome to the service,” Becky said with a forced smile. “Mom asked me to make sure you were properly greeted when you came.”

Rick smiled back. “Well, tell your mother thanks.”

“You can tell her yourself,” Leanne said, glancing from Rick to Becky with avid interest. “You’re supposed to sit with us.”

Becky flashed her sister a warning glance, but Leanne studiously ignored her sister, her entire attention focused on Rick.

“By the way, Rick,” Becky said, wishing her sister was more circumspect. “This is my little sister Leanne.” Becky put heavy emphasis on “little” hoping she would get the hint.

But Leanne just ignored Becky.

“That’s okay. I’m sure I can find a place,” Rick said.

“No. Come and sit with us.” Leanne touched Rick on the shoulder, winking at Becky. “That way we don’t have to find you after church. Makes sense, doesn’t it, Becky?”

“Perfect sense,” Becky said dryly. “Now we better go.”

“Becky is going to be singing in the worship service later on. She’s got a great voice,” Leanne said as Becky led the way through the crowd.

“I’m looking forward to hearing her,” Rick said.

Becky’s heart sank at his words. When she had maneuvered him into attending church she had forgotten she would be singing this morning.

And when she saw her family all sitting together, she regretted her impulse even more.

Just about the whole shooting match was watching her as she and Leanne led Rick up the aisle to the empty spot beside her parents. The only ones missing were Colette and her boyfriend, Nick.

“Hey Dad. Mom,” Becky said, flashing her brothers and sisters a warning look to dampen their sudden interest in the man behind her. As if that would help. Her family was as curious as magpies and just as nosy. Becky showing up with a man in tow was going to cause a lot of chatter and unwelcome questions.

She dropped onto the pew, and started reading the church bulletin as if trying to show them by her disinterest that he meant nothing.

But Leanne, the little stinker, had positioned Rick so he was sitting right beside Becky.

“Are you going to introduce us?” her father asked, nudging Becky.

Becky looked up at her father with a pleading expression, but his steady gaze reinforced years of ingrained manners. So with a reluctant sigh she turned to Rick, but he was looking away from her.

She touched him lightly on his arm to get his attention. He turned to her then, his eyebrows arched questioningly.

“Rick, I’d like you to meet my father, Sam Ellison. Dad, this is Rick Ethier. And my mother, Cora, you already met.”

Cora leaned over and waved, then turned as her attention was drawn by one of the kids behind her. Sam leaned past Becky, shaking Rick’s hand. “Pleased to meet you finally. We’ve heard about you from Becky, of course.”

“Really?” Rick’s gaze flicked back to Becky, his eyes glinting. “I didn’t think she gave me a second thought once she left the office.”

Not only second thoughts. Third and fourth ones, as well.

Duty done, Becky returned to her reading. But her entire attention was focused on the man beside her.

Would he look bored if he crossed his arms?

Rick shifted in his seat, fidgeted, then did it anyway. It had been years since he’d attended church. Not only did he feel out of the rhythm of the church service, he also felt out of place sitting with Becky’s obviously close family.

Beside him, Becky leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees, her chin planted on the palms of her hands, her attention on the preacher. Seeing her head canted to one side and her mouth curved in a half smile, he caught a glimpse of the girl he only saw when she was around other people. She wore a pale blue dress today in some kind of floaty, peasant-looking style. It enhanced the auburn tint of her hair, brought out the peach of her complexion. Pretty in a fun, semiflirty way. Not that she would be flirting with him.

“So I want to encourage all of us to pray for people who hurt us,” the minister was saying, and Rick pulled his attention back to the man. “Praying for our enemies frees us from bitterness. From hatred.” He paused a moment as if to bring the point home.

“As William Law said, ‘There is nothing that makes us love a man so much as prayer for him,’” he continued. “So Christ’s command to pray for our enemies is not only for our enemies’ good. It is for ours, as well.”

Rick looked down at the toes of his shoes as the minister’s words pushed him back to his last memory of his mother. She was sitting at a desk in her bedroom, her head bent over a book. When he had asked her what she was doing, she told him she was praying for him.

He looked over at Becky and wondered if she, too, had been praying for him as her parents had suggested. He doubted it.

The congregation got to its feet, breaking off his thoughts.

As the worship group came forward, Becky slipped past him, walked down the aisle and up to the podium. Without any announcement she picked up a cordless microphone, took her position on the stage and cued the group leader with a faint lift of her chin.

The music started quietly, the gentle chords of the piano picking out the melody, the electric organ filling in the spaces.

Becky faced the congregation, waiting as the rest of the musicians joined in. She stood perfectly still, holding the mike with one hand. An overhead light shone brightly on her, singling her out from the rest of the singers. At a pause in the music, she started singing.

Her voice rang clear as the words of an old familiar song poured out of her. “‘Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name.’”

Rick recognized the prayer. Had mumbled the words himself as a young boy still trying to please his grandfather.

But he had never heard them sung with such crystal sincerity. He couldn’t keep his eyes off Becky as she closed her eyes and her hand lifted up, palm up in a gesture of surrender. She was a woman in communion with her God, her prayer pouring out of her in song, peace suffusing her features.

And as she sang, he heard in the depths of his soul, a still small voice, familiar, yet long suppressed.

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