Kasey Michaels - The Anonymous Miss Addams

Quick tears sprang to her eyes. “How I loathe you, Mr. Standish,” she gritted out from between clenched teeth. “No, I have not yet regained my memory, sir. But I have met your father, your beleaguered servant, and this poor underfed, persecuted boy—and each of them is twice the man you are. You—you idiotic, conceited fop!”

“God’s beard! She makes of you a mockery, good sir! It is of the most deplorable!” Duvall exclaimed, taking three steps away from her in order to distance himself from her disparaging words.

Jeremy halted in his struggle to free himself from Pierre’s painful grip, his mouth hanging wide as he gasped at Miss Penance. “Dicked in the nob, dat’s wot she is,” he said at last. “Dat’s thanks, ain’t it, guv’nor—and atter all yer done fer ’er! Does yer wants me ter level ’er? She’s jist m’ size, so’s it’d be a fair fight.”

Pierre looked down on the recently liberated chimney sweep. “I’d rather you allowed Duvall to make you presentable, Master Holloway, if you are cudgeling your brain for a way to express your thanks to me. Duvall? You agree?”

“Ask of me to cut off my two hands, good sir, and I will gladly make them a gift to you. Have my tongue to be ripped out with the pincers and—” Duvall stopped himself, taking a deep breath and squaring his shoulders. “Yes, sir,” he ended fatalistically. “Very good, sir.”

“You both are so kind, you threaten to unman me,” Pierre drawled, a smile lurking in his dark eyes as he looked over to see Miss Penance holding back her fury with an effort. “Please leave us now, before I embarrass myself by falling on your necks in gratitude for your loyalty.”

Jeremy and Duvall reached the end of the path before Miss Penance said, her voice measured, “You…make…me…ill! I suppose you think I’m supposed to be feeling three kinds of a fool for berating you when you are so obviously deserving of my thanks for not allowing me to lie in the road when you discovered me? That is the point of this exercise, is it not? Well, please do not hold your breath waiting for my thanks, for you will only succeed in turning that insufferably arrogant face of yours a hideous purple!”

Pierre walked over to a nearby bench and motioned for her to sit down. “You’re right, of course,” he agreed, settling himself beside her. “I was the most horrid of selfish creatures to have spirited you away from your so comfortable resting place. How could I have been such a cad? How will you ever forgive me for my callous disregard for your privacy? Shall I order the horses put to immediately, so that I can return you there before bedtime?”

“Don’t be any more foolish than you can help. That’s not what I meant, and you know it!” she countered, longing to punch him squarely in his aristocratically perfect nose. “Obviously you have somehow rescued Jeremy as well, and probably done something for that poor, nervous Duvall so that he looks upon you as a near god. But if you have some twisted desire to surround yourself with fawning admirers, I’m afraid that in this case you have badly missed the mark. I may have been born, figuratively speaking, only this morning, but I do possess some basic common sense. You could not care less what happens to me. You’re only using me in some twisted, obscure way that benefits you, and I have to tell you, I resent it. I resent it most thoroughly! The moment I have recovered my memory I will be more than pleased to wave you a fond farewell as I go out of your life forever!”

“Such a passionate—dare I also mention, lengthy?—speech. You see me prostrate before you, devastated by your eloquent, long-winded vehemence,” Pierre drawled, stifling a yawn.

“Oh!” she exploded, jumping to her feet. “I can only hope I discover that I am a murderess, so I can kill you with a clear conscience!”

Watching as she ran back toward the house, leaving one too-large shoe behind on the gravel path in her haste, Pierre raised his hand to absently stroke the small crescent-shaped scar that seemed to caress his left cheekbone. “Such a darling girl,” he mused aloud. “I believe I have been more than justly revenged on my loving father.”

“SHE’S WHERE! I don’t believe it! I refuse to believe it!” cried a female voice. “Quickly, fetch me my harts-horn. I feel faint!”

“Rubbish. You never faint, for all your moaning. You’re strong as an ox,” replied her male companion.

“Oxen, always oxen! Have you no other animal to use as a comparison? To think that your last tutor told me you showed an active imagination. It’s a good thing I turned him off when I caught him winking at the upstairs maid, or I’d show him an active imagination! And have some pity on your elders. My poor heart could give out at any moment.”

“It would be a better job to stop worrying about your heart and begin worrying about your neck! About both our necks.”

“Why? We haven’t done anything, have we? They can’t hang a person for merely talking about murder. Besides, it’s only her word against ours. Oh, why did she have to end up there? Anywhere but Standish Court. André Standish! He’s completely, utterly ruthless. My blood runs cold at the very thought of him. He’s so smooth, so mysterious. He seems to know everything.”

“It’s not the father who worries me. It’s the son. I heard all about Pierre Standish when I was in London for the Season. He’s like the father, but meaner. Killed his groom, you know—just for saddling the wrong horse. I do wish, though, that my man had his way with a cravat.”

“But it has been five days since you went chasing off after her, and nothing has happened. I have been worried to death, waiting for you to return, waiting for the constable to come carry me away to some terrible, smelly gaol. Now you come back here, telling me she’s not twenty miles from this wretched hovel you’ve rented, and with André Standish of all people. How could you have hidden in the bushes, watching the son cart her away like that? What are we going to do when they confront us?”

“Why, we’re going to deny everything, of course. It’s her word against ours, after all, and besides, no one has been murdered—yet. Of course, there’s always the possibility she’ll die, for she was unconscious when Standish lifted her into his coach. God, to think that I had finally run her to ground, just to have her bolt away from me into the roadway as we heard a carriage approach. You cannot know how prodigiously I hated hiding in the hedgerow while Standish all but plucked her out of my hands. Yes, it would serve her right to die from the tumble she took. That would solve the problem quite nicely.”

“Then we’d be free of her forever! Oh, that’s above everything wonderful. But what if she lives? No, you have to go back to Standish Court. You have to go back, and silence her once and for all.”

“With Pierre Standish there to guard her? And you said you loved me. But you’re right. She has to die now, or everything is ruined.”

“Yes, yes, it does present a problem. But we have no choice. Besides, you don’t have to leave straight away. It can wait until tomorrow. Sit down, my dear, you look weary. Other than the fact that you couldn’t apprehend that dreadful girl, was it a nice trip? The countryside is so pleasing this time of year.”

JEREMY HOLLOWAY RAN halfway down the length of the shiny black and white tiled foyer in his stockinged feet, an oversized knitted cap pulled down over his ears, then skidded the rest of the way on the slippery floor, whistling through the gap between his front teeth as he held his arms wide to maintain his balance. He quickly held his hands out in front of him before he cannoned into the closed doors to the drawing room.