Tom Fort - The Grass is Greener - An Anglo-Saxon Passion

William Collins

An Imprint of HarperCollins Publishers 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF

www.harpercollins.co.uk

Published by HarperCollins Publishers 2001

Copyright © Tom Fort 2000

Tom Fort asserts the moral right to

be identified as the author of this work

A catalogue record for this book

is available from the British Library

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

Source ISBN: 9780007291342

Ebook Edition © FEBRUARY 2016 ISBN 9780007391141

Version: 2016-01-13

HarperCollinsPublishers has made every reasonable effort to ensure that any picture content and written content in this ebook has been included or removed in accordance with the contractual and technological constraints in operation at the time of publication.

‘Here is cultural history at its best: the story of the lawn, and the implements used to cut it, and the place it has in our culture and psyche. It is clear that the author is in thrall to the green stuff, as there is a wonderful personal account of the first lawnmower in his life, and of the details of his ongoing struggle to develop his own lawn to a level he feels satisfied with’

Country Life

‘A confident writer, he meanders into social commentary, definitions of Englishness and observations on masculinity, without ever going too far from his subject. I bet he can mow in straight lines’

New Statesman

‘Fort’s own perspective is, however, resolutely gardenesque. He loves lawns and lawnmowers. They are entangled with his dearest memories. He is a founder-member of the Old Lawnmower Club (membership 249 men and one woman) and the enthusiasm that pervades his book can make even that seem not ridiculous but somehow admirable’

Sunday Times

‘Even those without green fingers will find Fort’s hymn to horticulture entertaining. So you mad workers have nothing to lose but your daisy chains. Go on, stay in bed this weekend, give us all a rest’

Yorkshire Post

‘Tom Fort … in this ardent summertime essay on lawns and lawnmowers, conjures up a multitude of green thoughts in a green shade. Marvellous!’

Irish Times

‘Mower Man’s full blown identity is explored for the first time by Tom Fort. Ostensibly about the English love of lawns, The Grass is Greener is more an apologia for ‘our man’, as Fort puts it, and his intimate relationship with his beloved lawn’

Financial Times

‘I must admit that I did enjoy this celebration of my garden bete noire . This says a great deal about the achievement of the author. Fort has a lightness of touch which makes this book oddly beguiling as he hurtles us from the herber (medieval garden) down to today’s average patch of greenery. This is an effortless … and funny read’

The Mail on Sunday

‘ The Grass is Greener is a discursive and jolly book … Tom Fort comes into his own after the days of scythes and besoms, with the invention of the mechanical mower: “a small, peaceful revolution”.’

Victoria Glendinning, Literary Review

To my mother

COVER

TITLE PAGE THE GRASS IS GREENER An Anglo-Saxon Passion Our Love Affair with the Lawn TOM FORT

COPYRIGHT COPYRIGHT COPYRIGHT PRAISE DEDICATION Prelude Part One In the Beginning Pleasures of the Green Shaven Lawns and Vapid Greens The Moral Lawn Musings from The Shed (1) Albert’s Morning March Part Two Budding Genius The Budding’s Flowering The Glory of the Garden Velvet Robes Greensward and Minimum Bovver Musings from the Shed (2) Lawn Order, Man’s Business Part Three The Lawnsmen The Mowermen My Sward and Others KEEP READING BIBLIOGRAPHY INDEX ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ABOUT THE AUTHOR ABOUT THE PUBLISHER William Collins An Imprint of HarperCollins Publishers 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF www.harpercollins.co.uk Published by HarperCollins Publishers 2001 Copyright © Tom Fort 2000 Tom Fort asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books. Source ISBN: 9780007291342 Ebook Edition © FEBRUARY 2016 ISBN 9780007391141 Version: 2016-01-13 HarperCollinsPublishers has made every reasonable effort to ensure that any picture content and written content in this ebook has been included or removed in accordance with the contractual and technological constraints in operation at the time of publication.

PRAISE

DEDICATION

Prelude

Part One

In the Beginning

Pleasures of the Green

Shaven Lawns and Vapid Greens

The Moral Lawn

Musings from The Shed (1)

Albert’s Morning March