Paullina Simons - Red Leaves

‘Conni will believe it, you’ll see.’ Albert took Aristotle’s leash and fitted it over the dog’s head. ‘Remember, she wants to believe it. Why would she want to hear the truth? What’s she going to do with the truth? That’s the most important thing to remember. All I have to do is let her believe what she wants to believe in the first place. It’s that simple.’

Getting off the bed, Kristina said bleakly, ‘Is it that simple? It’s really the dumbest excuse.’

He shrugged. ‘So think of a better one.’

Picking up her books off the table, Kristina said, ‘We can’t do this, Albert. I can’t do this.’

He came to her. ‘You say that now…’ he drawled suggestively, running his free hand over her back.

‘I mean it.’ She pushed him off her. ‘I just - I can’t do this anymore. I’m starting to hate myself, and -’ She broke off.

‘And what?’

‘Nothing.’

‘And? You’re starting to hate me?’

‘I didn’t say that.’

‘You didn’t have to.’ His black eyes blazed. She backed off, not used to seeing his rare temper.

“I gotta go,’ Kristina said.

He shrugged. ‘Where’s your coat?’

‘Fahrenbrae.’

‘Ahhh,’ said Albert. ‘So take my jacket.’

‘What about you?’

‘I’ve got two.’ He unlocked her door and peeked outside. ‘All clear,’ he whispered and walked quickly down the hall to his room. She followed him.

‘I can’t take your jacket,’ Kristina said. ‘Jim or Conni is going to see me wearing it, and what am I supposed to say then?’

‘Make up something clever.’

‘Yeah? Oh, I left my coat up at this place Albert and I shack up at, and then he let me borrow his.’

‘No, something cleverer than that.’

She sighed deeply. ‘I’ll see you, Albert.’

He studied her for a moment. ‘I’ll see you tonight,’ he said, handing her his brown leather jacket. She shook her head and backed away toward the glass doors that led to the side stairs.

‘Rock,’ Albert called after her, almost as an afterthought. ‘Happy birthday.’

She nodded, unsmiling.

‘Will you at least think about Canada?’ he asked her.

Shaking her head in disbelief, Kristina smiled ruefully at him.

The glass door slammed shut behind her.

After her last class, Kristina had basketball practice, then showered and went to her car. Her long hair was still wet when she got in and started up the car. The Mustang coughed and spluttered for a few moments.

Nice car, she thought, trying to goad it on. Come on, come on, nice, dear, sweet car. I’m gonna take care of you when you get sick. You’re my friend. You’re nice, come on. And then the engine finally began to run smoothly. Kristina closed her eyes, thank God. You piece-of-shit car.

Someone knocked loudly on her window. Kristina opened her eyes. Conni stepped back, her arms folded.

Oh, no, Kristina thought, rolling the window partway down.

‘Hi, Conn, what’s up?’ she said. ‘I’m late.’

‘You’re always late,’ said Conni.

‘Doesn’t make me any less late,’ said Kristina pleasantly. Inside she felt terrible.

‘What’s up?’ said Conni, furiously curling a strand of hair around her index finger. ‘How come you didn’t open the door last night?’

‘I told you I was real tired. I was asleep when you knocked.’

Conni stared steely-eyed at Kristina. ‘Sleeping, huh? You could’ve opened the door.’

‘Could’ve, yes,’ Kristina said. ‘But didn’t want to. I was naked and tired. And it sounded like you had company in the hall.’

Conni narrowed her eyes to slits. ‘Did you have company in the room?’

Kristina got scared. Was this where it was going to happen? Right here, in the parking lot? ‘Constance,’ she said slowly. ‘What are you accusing me of?’

‘Nothing,’ Conni said quickly. ‘Nothing. I was just mad you wouldn’t open the door. Usually you never even lock it.’ She paused. ‘And I know you 7 veren’t with Jim.’

‘How do you know that?’

‘Because I was looking for Albert.’

‘In Jim’s room?’

‘Anywhere.’

Kristina sighed. ‘Conn, how often have you found Albert in Jim’s room? Albert never goes to Jim’s room. Never.’

‘How do you know that?’

‘Because that’s what Jim tells me.’ Actually it was what Albert told her. Albert didn’t feel comfortable with Jim anymore.

Relaxing a little, Kristina said, ‘I’m sorry you were upset. Next time I’ll open the door, okay?’ She rolled down her window.

‘You know,’ Conni said, ‘I was just… I just didn’t know where Albert was. He said he was going up to his room for a minute.’

‘Ahh,’ said Kristina and didn’t know what else to say. ‘I hope he showed up eventually.’

‘No,’ Conni said tearfully. ‘That’s the whole thing.’

There was a pause, while Kristina looked away from Conni, who seemed to be collecting her thoughts as she stepped from foot to foot in the cold. Kristina turned to face the front windshield and the parking lot and Hinman Hall ahead. She could see her own windows up there on the third floor. How nice it would be to be alone up in the room right now. She looked over to the right and stared at her bridge vacantly. Kristina’s Bridge. Maybe if it snowed soon… Kristina could have a few drinks, and walk her bridge, and not be scared anymore.

She turned back to Conni, who obviously was trying hard to come to grips with something.

Clearing her throat, Conni said, ‘Krissy, umm, listen. Was the dog with you?’

‘With me when?’ Kristina asked, wanting to roll the window back up.

‘Last night.’

Kristina’s heart was pounding. She is trying to trap me. But what can I say? I don’t even know if she spoke to Albert today. She is definitely trying to corner me into something, but what?

‘I don’t know,’ Kristina replied vaguely. ‘Listen, I really gotta -’

‘Albert said he walked Aristotle for you last night.’

Kristina kept her face passive, but inside she was relieved.

‘Yes. He came by, and took the dog,’ she told Conni.

‘He did?’ she exclaimed. ‘So you saw him?’

‘Briefly,’ Kristina replied.

‘And then?’

‘And then what? Then I locked the door.’

‘Why did you do that?’

‘Because I wanted to go to sleep, and he was gone a long time.’

‘How long?’

‘I don’t know, Conni. He never came up to bring the dog back.’ She didn’t know what else to say, and Conni still seemed dissatisfied. So Kristina said, ‘Maybe he’d gone to Frankie’s?’

‘That’s what he said he did. But he said he came back and knocked, you just didn’t answer.’

‘What time was this? I didn’t hear him,’ said Kristina without missing a beat, but thinking, God, Albert, I wish you had talked to me about this.

‘How long was he gone before I came up?’

‘I don’t know. Maybe a half hour.’

This wasn’t the first time Kristina had been interrogated by Conni. She wished it could be the last time, though. Since Edinburgh, Conni had been increasingly suspicious about Kristina and Albert. When Conni and Kristina roomed together in their freshman and part of their sophomore years, Kristina had never fallen under suspicion, but Conni had been sure Albert was seeing someone else.

Kristina lifted her black eyes to Conni, who was staring at her with the expression of someone who had just swallowed an unbelievable excuse, had bought it, and was now hating herself for it. Feeling very bad, Kristina said, ‘Conn, I thought he was with you. I thought he just took Aristotle down to your room and stayed there.’

‘Well, he didn’t,’ Conni said, struggling to keep her voice even.