Rosie Lewis - Taken - Part 3 of 3

She scowled. ‘It’s fucking obvious who I am.’ It was an accurate reply, honest and succinct. Veronica looked up from her notes, nostrils flared.

Alex dipped his head. ‘Indeed, indeed. And we’re very grateful to you for attending the meeting today, Christina. May I call you Christina?’

‘It’s my fucking name innit?’

Unruffled, Alex nodded. ‘Indeed. Precisely. Absolutely correct. Before we move on, may I say, Christina, that we appreciate this isn’t going to be an easy meeting for you. That much is acknowledged by all of us, I’m sure. Your attendance will be recorded in the minutes, and when Megan is older, if she chooses to read her file, she’ll know that you made an effort to attend.’ His eyes lingered on her for a moment, but when there was no response, he moved on. ‘The purpose of this meeting is to update ourselves with Megan’s progress and discuss the plans being put in place to secure permanence for her, now that a Full Care Order has been obtained. Hazel, would you bring us up to speed in terms of our legal position, please?’

Hazel opened her mouth to speak but Alex lifted his hand. ‘I beg your pardon, Hazel. May I just add, Christina,’ he looked across the table to where she was sitting, ‘that you have a right to call a halt to proceedings at any point if you hear something you don’t understand. I will endeavour to explain, but if we can’t resolve any misunderstanding between us, there are systems in place for you. I’ll furnish you with the details after the meeting, should you want details of leave to appeal.’

Christina stared at him with the hopeless expression of someone who didn’t have much confidence in anyone or anything, let alone the system. Was she right? I wondered. I was still hoping for someone in authority to overturn Veronica’s decision. I may have disagreed with a few social workers along the way, but my faith in the department as a whole was still intact.

Hazel clarified the legal position – a Full Care Order meant that Christina had been stripped of her parental rights, and no longer shared responsibility for Megan’s care with the state – and then went into detail about future contact with her birth family. Christina and Greg had both been granted two letterbox contacts a year, providing them with the opportunity of writing letters to Megan, which would be forwarded to her new family via the adoption team. Adoptive parents were expected to respond twice a year with letters of their own, and perhaps drawings or something personal from the child. As Hazel spoke, Christina stared around the room with slack-jawed disinterest, intermittently scrolling through her phone. ‘Has the final contact taken place?’ Alex asked, when Hazel eventually fell silent.

The social worker nodded. ‘Yes, yesterday. And I have to say, Christina dealt with the situation extremely well.’

‘What fucking choice did I have?’ Christina demanded, though she spoke the words mildly, her attention absorbed by something on her screen.

‘Well, you’d be surprised, Christina,’ Hazel said, staring at the top of the young woman’s head. ‘You held yourself together for Megan’s sake. Not all parents are able to do that. We were very grateful.’ Christina looked up, snorted with disdain and lowered her eyes again.

‘Indeed. Well done, Christina,’ Alex chimed. She didn’t respond. ‘OK, so,’ he turned to me, ‘Rosie, would you tell us how Megan is doing at the moment, please?’

It was a task I had been expecting, but when I tried to find my voice, a lump rose in my throat. I waited a beat or two, trying to concentrate on the rain running down the windows opposite. It worked, and for the next five minutes I spoke clearly about Megan’s day-to-day routines and the things she enjoyed doing, capturing the essence of her with no outward sign of the turmoil going on in my chest. Hazel’s eyes widened when I told them that Megan no longer wore nappies during the day, surprised to hear that, even though I’d only introduced the potty last week, she was already dry.

Alex smiled warmly as I spoke. Christina looked up intermittently, and Veronica smiled insipidly. ‘What you’ve said concurs with the report I’ve received from the paediatrician who conducted Megan’s health-care assessment,’ Alex said, when I fell silent. ‘She seems to be doing very well.’

‘Absolutely,’ Hazel chipped in. ‘She’s a very happy little girl.’ I might have imagined it, but there seemed to be an edge to her tone, as if she had a point to make.

‘Indeed, very pleasing. Hazel, would you care to update the meeting on current plans.’

Hazel nodded. ‘A Full Care Order was secured on 12 July. In line with procedure, Megan’s file has been passed to the adoption team. They’ve identified several couples who might be able to meet Megan’s needs, with one couple standing out as being particularly suitable. I’ll let Veronica fill you in a bit more on that. Rosie, her foster carer, had asked to be considered, but the adoption team have ruled that option out,’ Hazel said, pointedly again, I thought. Christina looked up sharply. ‘In the interests of placing Megan swiftly into permanence, Rosie has since withdrawn her application.’

‘I see,’ Alex said, his eyes meeting mine. He looked puzzled, but Veronica jumped in quickly before he could say anything.

‘We have a couple due to attend matching panel in about ten days,’ she offered, without prompting.

‘Yes, a-ha.’ Alex placed his hands on the table. He stared at them for a few moments and then he fixed his gaze back on the social worker. ‘Veronica, may I press upon you the importance of exploring all avenues when considering where Megan’s best interests lie, not just those you may have originally had in mind.’

Veronica stiffened, taking on a haughty expression. A rapid exchange ensued between them, one that I was only peripherally aware of. I was busy praying for Christina to show some sort of reaction. Something was happening – her phone lay abandoned on the table, her fingers frozen above the keys. Her eyes were running around the assembled group and she was frowning with incomprehension. Come on, I thought. Please say something. When she looked at me I gave the tiniest shrug of my shoulders, raising one eyebrow just a fraction. It was a subtle incitement to action but at first it didn’t seem to have any effect. Christina looked away. Then she gave a long, slow blink. ‘What did you just say?’

Veronica had been addressing the group but she stopped in mid-sentence. ‘I’m sorry?’

‘Not you. Her.’ Christina flicked her be-ringed forefinger at Hazel. ‘What did you just say?’

Hazel’s expression was non-committal, but I got the impression it was the reaction she’d been hoping for. ‘Er, I was just listening to Veronica actually, Christina.’

‘I know that. I’m talking about a minute ago, before she started waffling. What you said about her.’ She flicked her finger at me. Veronica suddenly looked uncomfortable. She squared her shoulders as Hazel repeated what she’d said. Christina listened with her mouth open. ‘You ain’t serious. Is she for real?’ she demanded, looking at me. I nodded but I didn’t say anything, my lips pressed together. ‘Who the fuck decided that was a good idea?’ Christina scanned the faces in front of her, jaw hanging, though this time there was purpose in her eyes. They were blazing with fury. I felt a huge surge of affection for her.

For a moment there was silence, and then Veronica cleared her throat. ‘We have a number of excellent couples who have been waiting for a suitable child,’ she said, emphasising the pluralism. ‘And one in particular who stand out as being –’

‘Yeah, yeah, you said all that already. But that’s her mum sitting there,’ Christina interrupted, jabbing her forefinger at me. ‘Or it may as fucking well be. It ain’t me who got up to her every night when she was puking, was it? I’d have loved to have that chance, but ’cos of you lot I couldn’t. So Rosie did it instead. And she always dressed her beautiful. Remember that pink tracksuit you put her in?’ she demanded, looking at me. ‘She looked like a princess in that.’ I didn’t think princesses were known for their tracksuits, but Christina could have come out with whatever she liked at that moment, as far as I was concerned. There was a valid reason why Megan couldn’t stay with me – it wasn’t Veronica’s fault, or anyone else’s, but after her initial disapproval, it felt good to hear Christina speaking out for me. I could have hugged her. In fact, in that moment I loved her – her husky voice, the profanities, the bizarre and random one-liners; I loved it all.