Julia Williams - My Christmas Wish

Do their families miss them too?

There are so many people who must have died in the earth’s history. Billions upon billions. There are billions of stars too.

I think every single one must be a star.

Just like you are.

Your son

Joe

Dear Mum,

Even though it is very cold today, I remembered a day you bought me ice cream.

I hit a boy at school. That was bad. But he kept shouting at me because I didn’t want to play Power Rangers. Power Rangers was a stupid game and I didn’t like it. He wouldn’t go away and he and his friends kept telling me I had to play. Why did I have to play? I knew I was getting angry and tried to take deep breaths the way you always told me too.

They laughed at me when I started rocking back and forth. I tried to find Mrs Thomas but she wasn’t there. I tried to run away from the boys, but they followed me. So I hit the boy who wanted me to play Power Rangers. And then there was trouble.

I know I shouldn’t have hit that boy. But he shouldn’t have shouted at me. He should have left me alone. I cried and said I was sorry, but I had to come home from school early that day.

You said it didn’t matter, and bought me an ice cream, and everything was ok.

I like ice cream.

Your son

Joe

Dear Mum,

I think sometimes you were sick when I was little. You used to fall asleep a lot when I asked for help with my homework. I didn’t like to wake you up.

Once Dad wasn’t there and you were asleep for a long long time. The lights were off and I was too small to reach the switch. I thought you might be dead. I was hungry but there was no dinner.

When you woke up your face was read and blotchy and you cried. I don’t know why you cried.

Perhaps it was because you were ill.

We had pizza for dinner today and you said I shouldn’t tell Dad you were ill. Otherwise he’d be worried.

I didn’t tell Dad.

Your son

Joe

Dear Mum,

I don’t know why you are dead. Why was it my mum who got knocked over and killed in a car park?

There are lots of bad people; dictators, murderers, terrorists – who are all alive. So why are you dead? You weren’t a bad person.

Sometimes you did do bad things.

I didn’t like it when you forgot to pick me up from school. That was a bad thing.

But mainly you did good things.

Like making me hot chocolate and helping me to stay calm when I was upset.

That was good. You were a good person.

So why are you dead, and all the bad people are still alive?

That isn’t right.

Your son

Joe

Dear Mum,

Venus was very bright this morning when I got up. I told Dad it was you, but I don’t think he understood me. I don’t think Dad always understands me very well. Not the way you did. But he tries. So that’s good.

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