Ian Whybrow - Muckabout School

From all around the canteen there came the snap and hiss of violently shaken fizzy drink cans being opened. That was soon followed by the squeals and shrieks of dozens of young Muckabouts spraying one another with fountains of brightly coloured, sugary liquid.

The headmaster was ready. He pulled the hood of the raincoat over his head to protect his neck from getting too sticky whenever they tried to squirt him. To stop any of the sprayers getting too close, he screamed his war cry and pelted them with bread rolls.

Then, when the food fight was over, the children dug into their packed lunches. Table by table, the noise changed to something like a regiment marching through deep gravel as all the children crunched away at their family-sized packets of crisps. That noise gave way in its turn to a gentle slurping as everyone began sucking the jam out of their doughnuts.

Everyone, that is, except… Gary Goody.

Gary always had a packed lunch, but up until now he had managed to keep it a secret from everyone else. Now, as he prised the plastic lid off his lunchbox, it was finally revealed. He had a succulent red apple and neatly cut slices of carrot and celery. He had a luscious egg, mayonnaise and cress sandwich in seeded wholemeal bread. And to finish he had a low fat raspberry yoghurt.

Gary might have got away with it if he hadn’t been sitting next to William Whale. William was such an enormous child that his bottom took up most of the bench on its own.

“ERRRR!” said William, as Gary crunched a stick of celery.

“I beg your pardon?” Gary asked.

“You can’t eat that in here!” William wailed, rising to his feet. “That’s healthy that is!”

At that, the whole table rose in protest. It wasn’t long before Mr Jolly came over to see what was going on.

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