Catherine Ferguson - Mistletoe and Mayhem - A cosy, chaotic Christmas read!

CATHERINE FERGUSON

A division of HarperCollins Publishers

www.harpercollins.co.uk

Published by Avon an imprint of

HarperCollins Publishers Ltd

1 London Bridge Street

London SE1 9GF

www.harpercollins.co.uk

First published in Great Britain by HarperCollins Publishers 2015

Copyright © Catherine Ferguson 2015

Cover design © Debbie Clement

Catherine Ferguson asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

Ebook Edition © October 2015 ISBN: 9780008142223

Version 2017-11-14

For Pamela, firm friendship from ‘Rustic’ beginnings!

Contents

Cover

Title Page Mistletoe and Mayhem CATHERINE FERGUSON A division of HarperCollins Publishers www.harpercollins.co.uk

Copyright Published by Avon an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers Ltd 1 London Bridge Street London SE1 9GF www.harpercollins.co.uk First published in Great Britain by HarperCollins Publishers 2015 Copyright © Catherine Ferguson 2015 Cover design © Debbie Clement Catherine Ferguson asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work. A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library. This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins. Ebook Edition © October 2015 ISBN: 9780008142223 Version 2017-11-14

Dedication For Pamela, firm friendship from ‘Rustic’ beginnings!

Ten weeks until Christmas Ten weeks until Christmas CHOCOLATE VODKA This tastes as gloriously indulgent as it sounds. You will need: 6 standard size Mars Bars 700ml vodka (the cheapest you can find as the quality makes no difference to the final taste) • Roughly chop the chocolate and melt gently in a bowl over a pan of simmering water, making sure the bowl is not touching the water. • When the chocolate begins to melt, start adding the vodka little by little, stirring it until all the chocolate is dissolved and everything is mixed together. (The caramel will be the last to dissolve so be patient!) • Set aside to cool. • Bottle your chocolate vodka and place in the freezer for at least 24 hours. (It won’t freeze but will form a lovely, thick, cold texture.) • Keep your chocolate vodka stored in the freezer.

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Four weeks until Christmas

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

One week until Christmas

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Three days until Christmas

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Five

Christmas Eve

Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Epilogue

Keep Reading

MISTLETOE AND MAYHEM

By the same author:

Acknowledgements

About the Publisher

This tastes as gloriously indulgent as it sounds.

You will need:

6 standard size Mars Bars

700ml vodka (the cheapest you can find as the quality makes no difference to the final taste)

• Roughly chop the chocolate and melt gently in a bowl over a pan of simmering water, making sure the bowl is not touching the water.

• When the chocolate begins to melt, start adding the vodka little by little, stirring it until all the chocolate is dissolved and everything is mixed together. (The caramel will be the last to dissolve so be patient!)

• Set aside to cool.

• Bottle your chocolate vodka and place in the freezer for at least 24 hours. (It won’t freeze but will form a lovely, thick, cold texture.)

• Keep your chocolate vodka stored in the freezer.

Why is it that giving something up makes the thing you can’t have a hundred times more desirable?

When I decided to stop snacking between meals, for instance, I had this weird, recurring dream where a monster made entirely of Wotsits (Really Cheesy flavour) was terrorising my village and the only way I could stop him was to tie him down and eat him.

Tough work, but someone had to do it. Did I mention this was actually a daydream? (Joke. I’m really not that disturbed.)

But the point is, I used to love my lazy Sunday mornings. Until I met Nathan and they became a thing of the past.

And now I can only dream about them …

Ah, the luxury of surfacing naturally, without an alarm braying manically in my ear … followed by oodles of delicious ‘quality time’ with Nathan … and then a little while later, when we’re feeling totally blissed out, maybe breakfast in bed with the newspapers …

Nathan raps on the bathroom door.

‘Leaving in ten minutes, Lola,’ he calls cheerily. ‘We don’t want to be late.’

‘Er – right with you.’ I turn on the taps much too quickly and promptly drench the crotch of my hill-walking trousers.

Scrubbing at the area with a towel, I eye the waistband critically in the vast mirror above Nathan’s butler sink washbasin.

If these trousers were any tighter, I’d be waving bye-bye to my circulation.

But since my only other sports outfit is in the wash, they’ll just have to do.

I unzip the top inch and breathe out thankfully.

The trousers were a Big Mistake, bought three months ago in the excited aftermath of Nathan asking me out for the very first time.

He’d suggested a four-hour hill walk followed by a bite to eat at a local vegetarian restaurant. My best friend, Barb, raised a single eyebrow at the proposed itinerary. But I just laughed and said I thought it showed a refreshing originality on Nathan’s part. I mean, who needs predictable?