Sorrel Anderson - The Clumsies Make A Mess

‘Absolutely not,’ said Howard. ‘Leave everything exactly as it is.’ There was a loud crashas Mickey Thompson

Howard rushed over.

‘Oops!’ said Mickey Thompson, happily.

‘Sorry!’ said Purvis, hauling him out.

‘Will you be careful,’ said Howard. ‘I’m fond of that plant.’

‘Yes, it’s lovely,’ said Purvis, trying to jam a flower back on its stalk.

‘Could I have a piece of that sausage, do you think?’ asked Mickey Thompson, eyeing it.

‘Oh, go on then,’ sighed Howard. ‘Help yourself.’

So Mickey Thompson tucked into Howard’s breakfast while Purvis swept pieces of plant on to the floor, and Howard fetched the mugs of tea.

‘Right,’ said Howard. ‘You’d better tell me why you’re here.’

‘We live here,’ explained Purvis.

Howard closed his eyes and made a groaning noise.

‘Why are you groaning?’ asked Mickey Thompson, cheerfully.

‘Where’s “here” ?’ said Howard.

‘Err, here in this building,’ said Purvis.

‘ Where in this building?’ pressed Howard.

‘Under your desk,’ said Mickey Thompson.

‘Because,’ Purvis continued quickly, ‘we thought it seemed like a very nice place.’ ‘Biscuits!’said Mickey Thompson, helpfully.

‘And you seem like a very nice man,’ said Purvis, hopefully.

‘H’rumph,’ said Howard Armitage.

‘And there isn’t really anywhere else we can go,’ said Purvis, studying his tea.

Howard sighed. ‘Oh, yes, all right then,’ he said. ‘You can stay.’

Hurray!’ said Mickey Thompson. ‘Can I have some more sausage?’

‘If you must,’ said Howard, getting up. ‘Right. I’ve got to go to a meeting. Don’t touch anything on that desk while I’m away.’

‘How about under it?’ asked Purvis.

‘Fine,’ said Howard.

So Howard went off to his meeting and the two mice started rimmagingunderneath the desk.

By the time Howard got back there was a large pile of clutterin the middle of the room. Propped against it was a LONG cardboard tube, which the mice were busy using in a game.

‘Look, Howard!’ called Mickey Thompson, sliding down the tube and landing at Howard’s feet.

‘I can see!’ said Howard.

‘Are there any more cardboard tubes?’ asked Purvis, puffing slightly.

‘I expect so,’ said Howard.

‘Why?’

‘If we could make the course bigger, we could win more points,’ said Purvis.

‘I’ll see what I can find,’ said Howard. ‘How do you win the points, anyway?’

Purvis took a deep breath. ‘You have to go round, over and through; through, round and over; over round and through; over, through and round; round, through and over; through, over and round, in the right order; then you do it all again in a different right order and after that it gets difficult to explain.’

Howard shuddered.

‘Well, we’ve started now,’ said Purvis, ‘so we might as well get to the end!’

‘If you say so,’ said Howard.

He left them to it and went to fetch the cardboard tubes from the storeroom, which was downa corridor, alonga corridor, and upa flight of stairs. But when he arrived, the door wouldn’t open.

‘That’s funny,’ muttered Howard, rattling the handle. He put his shoulder against the door and shoved.

It crashedopen and Howard tipped in, tripped over, and landed flat on the floor. There was a TOOTINGnoise.

‘Was that me?’ wondered Howard. The tooting happened again, louder and nearer.

‘That wasn’t me,’ said Howard. He got up, carefully.

‘TRUMPET!!!”went the noise, very loud and extremely near.

Howard jumped and bumpedhis head. Then something tapped him on the bottom. It was an elephant. ‘Concussion? This. Is it?’ said Howard, staggering. He shut his eyes, counted to five and opened them again, but the elephant was still there. It was a remarkably small one, about the size of a Labrador puppy. It looked eager, and slightly apologetic.

‘Err, hello,’ said Howard. The elephant gazed at him, and said nothing.

‘Hmm,’ said Howard. He scooped up some cardboard tubes and went towards the door.

‘Well, goodbye then.’

‘TOOT! TRUMPET! TOOOT!’went the elephant, and ran after him.

‘Oh dear,’ sighed Howard. ‘Yes. All right.’

The stairs to the storeroom were narrowand steep.

They stood at the top and looked down. ‘There’s nothing to worry about,’ said Howard. ‘I’ll go in front and you follow me.’

Howard started down the stairs and the elephant stayed where she was.

‘Come on now,’ said Howard, encouragingly.

The elephant didn’t move.

‘Come along,’ said Howard, coaxingly.

The elephant backed away.

‘Come!’ ordered Howard, exasperatedly. The elephant gave a panicked TRUMPET, did a little run backwards and forwards and launched herself off the top stair on to Howard’s chest.

‘Ooof,’ said Howard, and together they bumped painfully down the stairs, and bumped, even more painfully, on to the floor at the bottom.

When Howard and the elephant got back, Purvis and Mickey Thompson bounced over, squeaking excitedly:

‘It’s an elephant! It’s an elephant!’

‘Less of it,’ said Howard.

‘Why are you all hot in the face, Howard?’ asked Mickey Thompson.

‘Mickey Thompson,’ said Howard, breathing heavily. ‘So far today I’ve bashedmy shoulder, hitmy head, had my bottom proddedand my stomach squashed. I’ve been bumpeddownstairs and bumped,hard, on to the floor. There’s a pair of talking mice living under my desk and now there’s an elephant too. That’s why I’m hot in the face. Now, somebody put the kettle on while I think what to do.’

‘She’s only a baby,’ said Purvis.

‘We must look after her.’

‘Very probably,’ said Howard, ‘but I don’t know what she’ll eat.’

‘Buns,’said Mickey Thompson, quickly.