Ned Vizzini - Battle of the Beasts

“I, mmm …” He fumbled. “I met a collector.”

“A collector?”

“Yeah, a guy whose hobby is collecting Mastermind stuff,” said Brendan.

“This ‘collector’ just happened to be hanging out at school?” asked a skeptical Cordelia.

“Mom said you’re not s’posed to talk to strangers who hang out around school,” said Eleanor.

“It wasn’t a stranger,” said Brendan. “It was someone I know.”

“Who?”

“Norm the janitor.”

“Norm the janitor’s kinda weird,” said Cordelia.

“Yeah,” added Eleanor. “He’s always asking me if I wear Louboutin shoes.”

“Anyway, he offered to pay me one hundred dollars more for the bag than I originally bought it for,” said Brendan.

“The school janitor is going to pay you eight hundred bucks for a backpack?” asked Cordelia.

“Yep,” said Brendan. “Then I’ll be able to pay Mom back and—”

Eleanor interrupted. “That’s even stupider than Cordelia’s story. You both need to stop lying.”

Brendan and Cordelia looked at the floor. It hurt to be caught out.

“All right, it’s my turn to tell you guys what happened today,” said Eleanor. “But I’m telling the truth. These two girls told me I need a new phone.” Eleanor pulled out her starter phone. “Is this really so bad?”

“Yeah, Nell,” said Brendan. “You should ask Mom for a new one.”

“But I like it! It’s good enough for me! I don’t need all this fancy new stuff we have. I don’t even like being driven around in this car! It’s weird.”

“You’re the one who made all this happen,” said Cordelia. “You wished for the money. Think how broke we would be if we didn’t have it!”

“I don’t care,” said Eleanor. “And think if you’re Mom. Would you want to hear me asking for a new phone the same night you hear that you lost your backpack and you lost your tooth ?”

Eleanor was getting upset.

Cordelia gave her a hug, and then Brendan did.

“Don’t worry,” said Brendan. “After she finds out how messed up Deal and me are, she’ll be happy all you’re asking for is a new phone. And if those girls at school make fun of you again, just get your big brother on it.”

“Yeah?” asked Eleanor, still held tight by her siblings.

“Sure,” said Brendan. “You shoulda seen what happened when Scott Calurio started hassling me today. Let’s just say he won’t be doing it again.”

“Thanks, Bren,” said Eleanor.

Brendan gave her a big fake smile. Cordelia noticed this and realised her brother was lying. But she didn’t say a word. She just felt cold. We’re all lying about something. Maybe even Eleanor.

The car went over a big bump and their hug separated.

Back at home, Eleanor waited for the right moment to approach her mom. She decided that after dinner, when the dishes were cleared and the dishwasher was on, she’d send a text with a riddle she heard at school: What do you call a snoring bull? But she wouldn’t add the answer: A bulldozer. Then she would make up a story about how her phone was broken and some of her texts didn’t always get sent.

When the time came, though, Eleanor decided, I’m not lying to my mom. We’ve got enough secrets in this house.

“Hey, Mom!”

Mrs Walker was on the couch. Brendan and Cordelia were off upstairs. Dr Walker had never showed up for dinner.

“I think it’s time for an upgrade.” Eleanor presented her phone. “I know you don’t want me on the internet a lot, but you can get me a data thingy with tiny internet, or I could just take Dad’s other phone if he doesn’t want it—”

Mrs Walker sat up straight. “What do you mean, ‘Dad’s other phone’?”

Eleanor backpedalled. “I meant, Dad’s old phone.”

“No,” said Mrs Walker. “You definitely said other .”

“Right, well … you know, being dyslexic, I sometimes screw up words,” Eleanor said.

“You and I both know that isn’t part of being dyslexic,” said Mrs Walker. “Does your father have a secret phone?”

Eleanor gulped. Her mother’s eyes were … Eleanor looked for the word. Not mad … not sad … Anxious. And that’s worse than anything.

“I don’t know. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Look.” Mrs Walker took Eleanor’s hand. “Your father hasn’t been acting like himself and I really need to find out what’s going on. I can’t promise you that it will be easy, but if he has a secret phone, and you show it to me, it will help us figure out what his problems really are.”

“And then we can solve them?”

Mrs Walker nodded.

“And be a normal family again?”

“Well, I don’t know if any family is normal.”

“We used to be more normal.”

“I will grant you that.”

“Okay,” Eleanor said. “I’ll show you, Mom. But you can’t tell anyone what I’ve been doing.”

Eleanor brought her mother into the kitchen and said, “First, you need to cook up some pizza rolls.”

“What? Now you’re hungry? I thought you were going to show me the phone—”

“It’s in the attic.”

“Yeah …”

“Brendan’s in the attic,” said Eleanor.

Mrs Walker made a face, knowing this was underhanded. Still, within five minutes, the pizza-roll smell was wafting through the house and Eleanor was pulling her mother out of the kitchen as Brendan ran down towards it.

“I’ve been going to the attic when Bren’s not around,” Eleanor admitted as they went up the back staircase.

“Nell! It’s his room! Why would you do that?”

“To pretend—” started Eleanor, but she was cut off as they heard Brendan chanting: “ Pizza rolls! Pizza rolls! Pizza rolls! ”

“What do you pretend when you’re up there?” asked Mrs Walker.

“That the house is a big ship,” Eleanor said, “and the attic’s the captain’s quarters, and I’m the captain. Or that it’s the starship Enterprise and I’m Spock. Brendan does this thing where he hangs the rope in a certain way to try and catch if people go in there, but I know how to put it back so I don’t get caught.”

“Nell,” Mrs Walker said admonishingly, “it’s important to use your imagination, but it’s equally important to respect other people’s space.”

Eleanor nodded. She couldn’t admit the real reason she played in the attic: to look out the window and remember how it felt when she first saw the forest outside Kristoff House. Back on their adventure. When everything was so exciting. And when the Walkers were working together, facing challenges, being close – not lying to one another.

They reached the attic steps. Eleanor explained to her mom: “Okay, so sometimes, besides playing in the attic, I play in the dumbwaiter.” She pointed to the square metal door in the wall.

“That’s awful!” said Mrs Walker. “I mean, if the thing broke, you would—”

“Break my neck?”

“What on earth are you going to tell me next? That you’re joining a gang?”

“Relax, Mom. I’m just explaining how I saw Dad go into the attic.”

“Oh.”

“Friday after school, I was playing in the dumbwaiter, and I saw him go in. Like, secretly .”

Eleanor led her mom up the stairs.

There were two big piles of magazines in Brendan’s attic – Sports Illustrated and Game Informer – and one continuous snaking pile of dirty clothes that led to a hamper, which curiously held no clothes. Posters on the wall had started to peel off and been reattached with gum. A plate of blue-tinged grilled-cheese crusts rested on top of a goldfish bowl where Brendan’s goldfish, Turbo, refused to die.