Jeanne Willis - Penguin Pandemonium - The Wild Beast

For Harriet

Contents

Dedication

Chapter One - Poop, Poopy Do

Chapter Two - Doodahs and Minkies

Chapter Three - The Abominable Snowbeast

Chapter Four - Frosty

Chapter Five - A Funny Tern

Chapter Six - ‘The Windy Song’

Chapter Seven - Ready, Steady…

Chapter Eight - The Call of the Wild

Copyright

About the Publisher

Looks: Rockhoppers have spiky yellow and black feathers on their heads that look like long eyebrows.

How big? 45 to 58 cm – about half the size of adult Emperor Penguins.

Favourite food: Shrimps.

Penguin party trick: Rockhopper Penguins love to burst from the water and land on the rocks with a belly flop.

Flipper fact: They hop from rock to rock, keeping both feet together and can jump up to one and a half metres.

Looks: Fairy Penguins have blue feathers on their heads and backs but have white bellies.

How big? 30 to 33 cm – the world’s smallest penguin.

Favourite food: Sardines and anchovies.

Penguin party trick: In the wild, Fairy Penguins are nocturnal so they only go on land at night (well past the Rockhoppers’ bedtime).

Flipper fact: The world’s smallest penguin – they are also known as the Little Penguin, or the Little Blue Penguin.

Looks: Emperor Penguins have black backs, white tummies and bright splashes of yellow and orange on their front and their ears. The chicks are fluffy and grey and their faces are white, not black.

How big?! Up to one metre tall – the world’s tallest and heaviest penguin (over three times as tall as Little Blue!).

Favourite food: Squid.

Penguin party trick: When an egg is laid, the male stands with the egg on his feet to keep it warm until it hatches (this can take up to nine weeks).

Flipper fact: Emperor Penguins can stay under water for nearly twenty minutes!

Looks: Chinstrap Penguins get their name from the small black band that runs under their chin.

How big? Up to 68 cm (twice as tall as Fairy Penguins).

Favourite food: Little shrimps called krill.

Penguin party trick: Chinstraps are also known as Stonecracker Penguins because their call is so harsh it sounds like it could break stones.

Flipper fact: Chinstraps are the most common type of penguin – there are about thirteen million of them in the world.

… Ahem, he’s a GOOSE!

aturday at City Zoo was usually the busiest day of the week, but not today. And not last week either. For some strange reason, the crowd that normally gathered to see the penguins had shrunk to almost nothing. It was all very sudden and none of them could understand it, least of all Rory the rockhopper.

Rory had been waiting all morning for people to arrive. He was keen to show off his latest belly-sliding stunt that he’d been practising with his mates, Eddie and Clive, but nobody came. Rory waddled across the snow and gazed up at the webcam suspended above the enclosure. It recorded everything the penguins did and, when they appeared on the internet, people usually came from far and wide to see them. So what had changed?

The way Rory saw it, only two things could have happened: either penguins had gone out of fashion or Penguin Cam had a technical fault. The first reason was unthinkable – everybody loved penguins. It had to be the second reason. It had been a long, hard winter, the frost must have cracked the lens and, as no one could see them in action any more, people might have forgotten that the penguins existed.

Rory decided to investigate, but the camera was high up and his legs were so short he couldn’t see, so he jumped up and down as hard as he could, kicking his feet and flapping his flippers to gain some extra height.

“Yoo hoo!” he called. “Is anybody out there? Come and see me! Why don’t you love me any more?”

“Maybe it’s the way you dance,” said a voice. “Or are you hopping about because you need the toilet?”

Rory swung round. It was his best friend, Blue, the fairy penguin. He stopped bouncing and pushed back his head feathers to hide his embarrassment.

“That was not a toilet dance, Fish Face. I was checking to see if Penguin Cam was broken. If people could see how talented and handsome I am, they’d be here by now.”

“Maybe the lens cracked when you looked at it,” grinned Blue.

Just then, the two brown bears who lived in the paddock above the penguins butted in. Orson leant over the rails and squinted at the camera.

“There’s nothing wrong with it,” he said.

“Yes, there is,” insisted Ursie, “it’s pointing at the penguins instead of the bears. We’re far more entertaining – we sing, we dance, we tinkle on the ivories.”

Rory’s beak fell open.

“You tinkle on the what? Can’t you go behind a bush like everyone else?”

The bears looked at him blankly, then, realising he’d misunderstood the phrase, they slapped their furry thighs and guffawed.

“Oooh… I’m laughing so hard, I’ve tinkled on my ivories!” snorted Ursie, stuffing his paws between his legs.

“Me too!” said Orson. “Just goes to show how little penguins know about entertainment. Fancy not knowing that tinkling the ivories is showbiz for playing the piano.”

The bears could be very irritating and Rory was beginning to lose his temper.

“You haven’t got a piano!” he yelled.

“No, but if we did, it would be a good way to lure the visitors back,” said Orson, pretending to play a few imaginary chords. “No one’s coming to see us either. Do you know why?”

Rory scratched his head. “Maybe it’s the weather.”

“I bet Rory’s right,” said Blue. “Maybe people can’t get to the zoo because of the snow.”

Orson shook his head.

“Wrong! There are more visitors than ever, aren’t there, Ursie?”

“Record numbers,” agreed Ursie, “but they’re not coming to see you or us because of You Know Who.”