Jay Crownover - Asa

I knew instinctively she wouldn’t approve.

“Why wouldn’t you?” His drawl was so smooth, so velvet soft, as it wrapped around me. I just wanted him to whisper things to me in the dark forever.

“I’m friends with Saint and I adore Nash, but this is a big deal, something you share with family. I’m not part of that.”

He just stared at me and then grunted. “Go park. We’re going up together.”

I shook my head. “No, we’re not.”

I watched as the fire lit back up in his eyes and they switched back to their intoxicating whiskey color. “Fine.” He settled back in the seat, crossed his arms over his chest, and lifted a sandy-blond eyebrow at me. “If you don’t have to go up, then neither do I. You can drop me off back at the Bar.”

I gasped at him a little and narrowed my eyes at him. “Rome asked you to come. You should be inside right now, not arguing with me. You’re wanted up there.”

His mouth kicked up on the side, and I saw just how easy it was for him to charm people out of common sense. He was pretty day in and day out, but that grin had the devil and temptation in it, and it turned him into something otherworldly. No mere human looked that good after a full day of work and a bout of unfulfilled groping and fondling. It was obvious the path to every decadent sin led right through Asa Cross, and man oh man, did I want to race down it. I would never understand why he insisted on putting so many roadblocks in my way.

“Saint got in touch with you, so obviously someone wants you here. She’s shy and there is a lot of commotion to handle when this group gets excited about something. You ever stop and think maybe she needs you as her buffer?”

I cringed because I did know that. Saint loved Nash’s friends, was deeply immersed in their world and definitely accepted as part of the ramshackle family, but it was easy for her to get lost in the sea of strong, dominant personalities and she did like having me around to be her port in the storm. Only instead of wanting to be there for my friend, I wanted to run because I didn’t know if I could stand any more judgment coming my way. I had only been doing my job. I hadn’t wanted to be the one to put Asa in cuffs and take him in, but it had to be done and I unfortunately had to be the one to do it. I respected all of those ladies so much; seeing disappointment in their eyes when they looked at me might very well be the thing that tipped me over the edge of the cliff I was precariously holding on to at the moment.

I sighed because I could see that Asa was serious in his threat. Calling him every bad name in my head that I could think of, I wheeled the 4Runner into a parking spot and turned the engine off.

“You’re a manipulative jerk, you know that?”

He finally threw the door open and climbed out. The blast of winter air almost knocked me over and I remembered belatedly that all I had on was my gym clothes.

He walked around the front of the car and stopped when he reached my door. Without a word he pulled it open and put a hand on my arm and practically dragged me out. He shook his head when he saw how I was shivering, and took his big, heavy coat off and put it around my shoulders. It smelled like him and I wanted to cuddle into it and rub my face in the leather, but I was too busy glaring at him as he told me, “Now you’re catching on, Red.”

All he had on was a long-sleeved thermal, so I tried to hand the coat back to him, but he just grunted and put a hand on my lower back and guided me to the front doors. I blew out a breath that fogged up the air in front of us and told him quietly, “Your sister hates me. She’s gonna lose her mind when she shows up and sees me here with everyone.”

He chuckled and the sound sent chills racing all across my skin.

“Ayden is protective … of her friends, of her man, of me. She sometimes goes off before she thinks things all the way through. She doesn’t hate you. She hates that I’ve lived the kind of life that I have. In fact the only person she’s ever actually hated is me. That wasn’t the first time she’s had to come get me out of jail, and Lord only knows if it’ll be the last. She knows you were just doing your job, Royal. She just wants to save me. She’s always wanted to save me.”

I cut him a hard look out of the corner of my eye. “Why didn’t you say anything that day? Those kids jumped you, hurt you, and yet you just let us take you in with no complaint. Why?” I had wondered since the day Dom and I had been sent to the Bar to pick him up.

The hospital was busy. I was here enough that I knew the way to the labor and delivery unit without having to ask for directions. Asa followed along beside me without responding to my question. I thought he was just going to ignore me, until we got in the elevator and the doors swished closed. He turned and faced me, and that grin that turned his face into something I would dream about forever flashed at me.

“What’s the point? I’m always going to be the bad guy even when I’m not.”

I frowned. “You could have defended yourself. You were innocent. Those kids set you up.”

There was video proof of the fact, which had ultimately led to him being cleared of all the charges that were filed against him.

I started a little when he reached out and very gently ran the tip of his index finger over the line that had furrowed between my eyebrows as I scowled up at him.

“I’m not defending myself ever again. Not to my sister. Not to the police. Not to anyone. People are going to think what they want, and sadly most of those things that they think are going to be right about me. I’m guilty of a lot of bad shit, Royal. Most of it I never got caught for. Karma has a way of catching up with you, especially when you laughed in her face one too many times.”

I was baffled by his response and sort of stunned by the care in that simple touch.

“Are you telling me you would’ve been willing to go to jail for something you didn’t do as some sort of penance for all the other bad stuff you did in the past? That’s crazy, Asa.”

He just shrugged a shoulder and the doors swished open and we walked into a waiting room full of anxious and excited family and friends. I knew he was carrying around a barrel stuffed full of shame and remorse from his misdeeds of the past. What I hadn’t realized up until that very moment was that he was willing to let that barrel crush him rather than set it down and sort through its contents.

Saint was at the desk talking to the lady behind it. Rome was pacing back and forth in front of an older couple that I assumed had to be his and Rule’s parents since Shaw had almost no contact with her family; Salem was curled up in a ball on one of the chairs with her head on Rowdy’s shoulder; Nash was leaning against the wall with a baseball hat pulled low over his eyes; and Cora was nowhere to be seen.

I faltered a little bit when all eyes turned to us as we approached. At first I thought they were all wondering why I was there, but quickly realized that they were all wondering why Asa and I had shown up at the exact same time and that they were all probably curious as to why I was still wrapped up in his coat. I shrugged out of it even though it felt like I was handing over a security blanket and cleared my throat.

“Hey.”

Asa echoed the greeting and shook Rome’s hand as the gigantic retired soldier walked over. I squeaked a little when the big man scooped me up in a tight hug that I couldn’t help but return. When he put me back on my feet I just gaped up at him in surprise. He smiled down at me and I couldn’t help but smile back.

“I was going to have Cora ask you to go get him if he didn’t show. I was gonna tell you to use force if necessary.”