Rebecca Pugh - Return To Bluebell Hill

‘I’m fine, thanks. You?’ She righted her position, pulled herself up a little straighter. She imagined she looked like a child cowering in the corner of the compartment and something about this man made her want to appear more womanly than she’d ever been before. She discreetly smoothed down her raven black hair and swept her fringe from out of her eyes.

He pushed up the sleeves of his hoodie to reveal toned, tanned forearms and grinned. ‘Great, thanks.’

She was treated to another of his smiles and couldn’t help but return it. There was something about him that captivated her. His confidence perhaps? Whatever it was, she liked it. Rather a lot, actually. She wasn’t used to chatty strangers. Especially handsome chatty strangers, and rarely did they attempt to speak to her. There just weren’t that many around. Well, not that many besides this one who had just happened to cross her path. But anyway, this wasn’t the time for flirting. She had more important things to think about. She offered him another quick smile that she hoped didn’t appear rude and turned to face the window once again.

Not long now, she mused. She placed her forehead against the glass and watched the outside world as it passed by.

‘Off on your holidays?’ the handsome stranger asked.

He must have noticed her suitcase. ‘Something like that.’ She glanced at it, too. It sent her stomach violently lurching into what felt like a washing machine spin-cycle. She looked away, determined to ignore its existence. Stupid thing.

‘Anywhere nice?’ he continued, oblivious to her discomfort.

‘I’m off to Cornwall,’ she replied quickly, blurting out the first thing that came to mind. ‘A few days by the sea. I can’t wait.’ An image popped into her mind of herself wearing a pretty sundress and taking a happy stroll through the seaside town. There were seagulls, ice-cream, sand castles and the scent of the sea-salt whistling through the air. It was a shame that her reality looked nothing like that but he didn’t need to know the not-so-pretty version. They were strangers. She could pretend to be anyone doing anything right now, so why bother with the nasty reality of where she was really going and what she was really doing there? Right now, she wanted to be that sundress-wearing, carefree young woman rather than the one carrying the world on her shoulders and struggling beneath the weight of it.

‘Oh, nice. I haven’t been to Cornwall in years,’ he said with a smile. ‘I love it down there, though. The sea, the sand, the little cafes and seaside shops. Excellent choice.’ Another smile crossed the space between them.

‘What about you?’ she asked, while trying to understand just how he could be so damn attractive. He really was out of this world. ‘Where are you off to?’

‘I’m not off for a few days by the sea, sadly. Just off to visit the parents and then back home. I’ve been to see my brother out in the sticks. A nice way to spend my morning, with his kids clambering onto my back and telling me to pretend that I’m a horse. I must have done about fifty circuits of the lounge carpet.’

Jessica giggled at the image of such a hunk of a man allowing his nieces and nephews to ride around on his back. It was amusing to say the least, and quite adorable. ‘That sounds lovely.’

He rolled his eyes playfully, although it was obvious he’d enjoyed himself. You only had to look at the sparkle in his eyes to see that. ‘It would be lovely if my bro wasn’t such a show-off. He’s got a gorgeous home, beautiful wife, fantastic kids. He likes to remind me of what I’m missing out on. But you see, he doesn’t actually realise that while he was gifted with all of that, I was the one gifted with the good looks and the easy charm.’ He winked playfully. ‘So, who’s the real winner here, hey?’

As she laughed once more, she took note of how much she was enjoying his company. He was so open and friendly and she was glad that she hadn’t mentioned her real destination and the reasons behind it. If she’d attempted to chat to a stranger back in London, they no doubt would have walked off and thrown a worried look over their shoulder before hot-stepping it to the other side of the road with 999 on speed-dial. He was refreshing. And oh, what she wouldn’t give to be able to visit a brother or sister, or any family members for that matter. For just a second, her body flooded with envy. She didn’t have anyone to go and visit. Not really. ‘You’re lucky,’ she commented quietly, staring down into her lap and hoping that he hadn’t heard her.

The remainder of the journey slipped by. Jessica found herself dozing off, her forehead wobbling against the glass as she slipped in and out of sleep. She jolted upwards and glanced about herself more than once, panicking that she’d arrived, but each time she did so, she was relieved to find that the train was still juddering along through the small villages that lined the way. Every second that passed was a second closer to her life before London and it was terrifying to say the least.

***

It was late afternoon when the train began to slow down, preparing to stop at the next station. Jessica’s mouth went dry as she realised that this was her stop. A handful of passengers began to retrieve their bags from the overhead containers and prepared to depart, excitable chatter and farewells filling up the train. She was even more horrified when her handsome companion stood up. Apparently, this was his stop, too.

‘This is my stop,’ he announced cheerfully. A sliver of toned stomach was revealed to her as he stretched his arms above his head and emitted a yawn, his grey t-shirt riding up. She had to admit, it had been a long journey. ‘Still a while to go until Cornwall,’ he said, smiling down at her. ‘I hope you have a nice time while you’re there. Say hello to the seagulls for me.’ His eyes lingered on hers for a second or two longer until he offered a devastating smile, showing off every single white, shiny tooth in his mouth, and held up a hand to say goodbye. Jessica watched him disappear. If she hadn’t been so panicked, she probably would have said goodbye too, but as it was, she watched him leave without another word.

This was it. She was here.

She stepped down onto the platform with a slow exhale. On the outside, she imagined she looked calm and collected but on the inside, a storm was raging.

She searched the sea of faces to ensure that her handsome companion had definitely left the vicinity, otherwise there’d be questions regarding a trip to Cornwall coming her way. Just her luck it had turned out that he’d been getting off at the same stop as her.

She lingered beside a vending machine and waited. The train left the station a few minutes later and it was then that she realised there was no going back. London was too far away for her turn back around and leave now, even though she had the overwhelming urge to do exactly that. She clutched the suitcase handle for support and allowed her eyes to rest on the hazy blue sky that stretched out in the distance. It didn’t take long for the busyness of the platform to settle down. It was eerily quiet once it did but that was nothing new for this place. It had always been the same. Peaceful, lazy, and a world away from the setting she’d left behind.

She closed her eyes, counted to ten, and told herself that she could do this.

Chapter Two

‘Jessica? Is that you?’

She spun round on the grey concrete. Her eyes fell upon Esme. It was amazing how just the mere sight of someone had the power to soothe and calm you.

All pretences fell as she walked towards the woman she hadn’t seen for almost ten years. She’d been building herself up for this moment. She’d wanted to appear strong and capable. She wasn’t a little girl anymore, after all. She was a grown woman and she could deal with things perfectly well on her own. Or so she’d thought.