Therese Beharrie - Falling For His Convenient Queen

‘You want me to see that man,’ she said, fighting to keep the panic she felt from her voice. ‘For some reason, you think it’s easier.’

‘No, Nalini. You’re the one who thinks this situation is easier than it is.’ He sat back now. ‘You’re hoping that I’m not that man, and that’s why you want to get to know me. But I’m sorry, I don’t have time to quell your fears. You told me you made this choice. And the thing about making choices is that you have to deal with their consequences.’

She suddenly wanted to scream at him, to tell him that she knew everything about choices and their consequences. She could still feel the girls pulling at her jewellery and clothes that night on the beach. She could still hear the boys laughing at her panic. Worst of all, she could still see Josh’s face as he laughed with them, the person who’d told her he’d keep her safe gone, leaving only the sick realisation that he’d never existed.

And then there was the way her family had reacted after...

The fact that she was on Kirtida, having this conversation with him, was her dealing with the consequences of her actions.

But, of course, she could voice none of that.

‘Fine,’ she said quietly. ‘I won’t waste my time trying to find some redeeming quality in you.’

She saw the surprise but it faded quickly. ‘Good. Because you won’t.’ With those words, he walked out of the room.

She sat there for a moment, not entirely sure what to do, and then stood. It took her another few minutes to figure out that she didn’t know where her room was, and was about to ask when a young woman came up to her.

‘Your Royal Highness, His Majesty King Zacchaeus has asked me to show you to your room.’

Nalini’s chest loosened in relief. ‘Thank you.’

She followed the woman—Sylvia—as her thoughts swirled around what had just happened. She had been so sure that Zacchaeus had wanted to say yes to her. That he would have said yes to her, but that he’d stopped himself.

Or had that just been in her mind?

She hated the uncertainty, that special kind of doubt that she hadn’t felt in nine years. Or perhaps the kind of doubt she’d felt every day for those nine years. But it felt more acute now, though that was probably normal. Nalini hadn’t made a decision of her own—not really—in that amount of time. She shouldn’t be surprised now, after she had, that she was being reminded of the fears that had stemmed from that fateful night.

She reminded herself that this decision had been nothing like the one nine years ago. Nalini had gone into this one with her eyes open. And yes, perhaps she’d hoped that Zacchaeus would be on the same page as her. That she could find some common ground between them so that marrying him wouldn’t be so completely terrifying. But now that she knew where she stood, she had to accept it.

She would accept it.

She murmured her thanks to Sylvia when they got to the room, and waited to be alone before she looked around. Like the rest of the castle, the room was a mixture of old and new. It was spacious, the walls and beige carpet no doubt old, but modernised by a king-size bed covered in white that matched the chiffon curtains. Large windows stood above a chaise longue and Nalini immediately opened them, breathing in the fresh sea air.

The day had changed, she noted. The sun had been eclipsed by clouds, the sky a grey colour that felt ominous. The water thrashed against the pier that was visible from her window, and when she leaned forward she could see the faint outline of the castle of Mattan.

The longing for home pulsed in her veins but she knew she couldn’t go back. Perhaps that was why the longing felt so desperate. If she went back she would be returning to a life she’d never thought she’d have. A life where she did everything that was expected of her just so that she could prove she’d learnt from her mistakes.

But she’d seen how her sister, Alika, and Xavier’s lives had turned out because they’d followed all the expectations of them. It had made them incredibly unhappy, and she’d dreaded that future for herself. But she’d been afraid to do anything about it. Because once, a long time ago, she had done something about it and it had broken her heart—and her dreams—in one night.

But when Xavier had announced his engagement with Leyna she’d been given a glimpse of a life she could have. And when she’d last spoken with Alika she had realised her two options.

On the one hand, she could choose to disobey her mother and grandmother to protect her kingdom. They might not be happy with her decision, but for the sake of Mattan they would accept it and acknowledge that it was a responsible choice.

At least that was what she hoped.

It was an added benefit that being on Kirtida would give her the freedom of making her own decisions. She could regain that excitement for life she’d lost so long ago. She could have her independence.

On the other hand, she could listen to them and stay. She could keep on living the life she’d been living. She’d marry a man her mother and grandmother had chosen, just like Alika had, and be unhappy. Just like Alika was.

Alika would never say it aloud, but Nalini knew her older sister. And though Nalini no longer expected love or happiness, she’d hoped for contentment at the very least. Alika had always accepted her fate without complaining. And sometimes Nalini wished she could be like that too. But she wasn’t. She knew that if she wanted her chance at contentment she couldn’t just accept, or do, what was expected. And Zacchaeus’s proposal—if it could be called that—had come at exactly the right time for her to act on her realisation.

So she’d gone for the first option. Which had brought her here. To an island where she knew no one except the man who had demanded that she marry him. Who was refusing to spend any time with her, leaving her completely alone.

But she couldn’t go back home.

A knock on the door roused her from her thoughts and she opened it to see Sylvia again.

‘Your Royal Highness, I’m sorry to interrupt. His Majesty King Zacchaeus has requested to see you in an hour.’

Nalini frowned. ‘Why?’

‘I’m not sure, ma’am. All he said was that he had a proposition for you. Shall I tell him you’ll be there?’

A proposition, she mused. From the man who’d turned down her own barely an hour ago.

Interesting.

‘Please do.’

CHAPTER THREE

‘YOU WANTED TO see me?’

Nalini’s voice pulled him from his work and Zacchaeus looked up to see her standing in the doorway of his library. She had changed from earlier and was now wearing black trousers and a white shirt. The shirt was loose, cut into a V at her neck, and gave him only the barest glimpse of bronze skin. It was in no way inappropriate and yet, by the way his body reacted, he could have sworn that she was hardly wearing anything.

‘Yes. Did you settle in well?’ he asked in a gruff voice.

‘Fine, thank you,’ she answered, her tone perfectly polite—cool, even—and so very different to the passionate tone she’d used earlier.

That was his fault, and he was helpless to change it. He’d acted exactly like the man he was trying to convince her he was. Power-hungry, cruel, selfish. And though he might not entirely be that man, he wasn’t who she wanted him to be either. In fact, he was probably closer to the man he’d told her he was than the man she wanted him to be.

Or did he just believe that because of how his parents had treated him?

‘Can I get you something to drink?’ he asked to distract himself.

‘No, thank you.’ She paused. ‘Why am I here?’

Right to the point then. Not that he could blame her. He gestured for her to sit and, after hesitating, she took the seat opposite him.