Tara Quinn: My Babies and Me

“Heading for Chicago?” Jill asked. Susan could hear the impertinent grin in her assistant’s voice.

“Not that you know about.”

“Don’t worry, Susan, there’ll be no calls from me unless the old lady croaks.”

“Even that can wait until Monday,” Susan muttered as she hung up the phone.

Michael’s secretary had said he’d be back that night. She was going to be there to welcome him home personally. She needed a fix.

And maybe, just maybe, she’d get up the guts to ask for the present she wanted most in the world.

A tiny little life to nurture and love and fill her up again.

She had a feeling she’d have to put forth the most convincing argument of her life if she hoped to win this one. Of course, that was what she’d thought when she’d been set on talking Michael out of their divorce. And look where that had gotten her.

MICHAEL TRIED to reach Susan again when he touched down in Chicago. Not only was he dying to share his news, even if everything was only in the possibility stages, he’d also remembered on the flight home that today was Susan’s birthday. To celebrate, he stopped at the American Airlines counter and bought them both tickets to Hawaii for Easter weekend. It had been too long since either of them had taken a vacation.

The tickets were open-ended, as always. He could change them if Easter wasn’t good for her.

She was out of the office until Monday. Still no answer at the condo. Knowing how much Susan loved birthdays, knowing more than anyone how she did everything to excess, he was sure she’d found some crazy way to celebrate this last birthday in her thirties. Things like that mattered to Susan. Celebrating. And momentous birthdays. Michael usually had to stop and think to even remember how old he was. Age wasn’t anything that had ever mattered to him. He supposed it might be different for women.

Catching sight of a departure board as he walked by, Michael found himself searching for any flights leaving for Cincinnati that evening. He wanted to be with Susan. To share his news. To share her celebration. To make love to her...

He wanted to go home.

And because his wanting threatened to override good sense, Michael went to pick up his forest-green Pathfinder from the airport’s parking garage instead. His home was here for now, in the condo he’d purchased when he’d moved to Chicago seven years ago. He and Susan had made their choices then. Forced to decide between staying together and climbing to the top, neither one had been willing to give up on career success. As great as their marriage had been, their careers had meant more—to both of them.

He had the day’s industrial summaries to go over. Reports to study. He’d catch Susan later when she was all celebrated out.

And maybe he’d be able to talk her into a quick trip to Chicago in the not-too-distant future.

Two DRINKS AT LUNCH. Another one instead of dinner. And peace was as elusive as ever. Seth Carmichael stayed at his desk until his eyes stung from lack of sleep, and he knew he had to pack it in. Go home. He’d been up for more than twenty-four hours. He’d taken the red-eye after last night’s meetings in Alaska to make it back here in time for Susan’s birthday. He’d like to think that meant he’d fall into bed the second he hit his apartment, that he’d sleep the sleep of the just. Or the dead.

But he knew he wouldn’t.

And that was why he was still at work two hours after everyone else had gone home for the night. Of course, they all had families to go home to. Seth had an apartment filled with stale air. There weren’t even any plants sharing the place with him. He was gone so much any plants he brought home just shriveled up and died.

He locked up carefully and walked out of the building that housed the offices held by Hier Engineering. In the parking lot, Seth climbed into his Bronco, pleased with the power beneath his hands as the engine turned over instantly.

Bitch of it was, he liked his life. Or he had. He loved his job. Enough to know that when he was seeing double like this, he had to leave the figures alone. He couldn’t risk a mathematical error that could result in a tragic accident—a building not as sturdy as it needed to be, a bridge that cracked. These were his real nightmares.

Almost of its own accord, Seth’s Bronco headed in the opposite direction from home, toward a part of town he no longer had any reason to visit.

So why were his nights filled with a couple of sullen little faces and a more determined beautiful one? It had been four months since Laura’s ultimatum. Four months.

He felt as raw as if she’d hurled those hateful words only yesterday. They were as clear in his mind as if she had.

Hell, it wasn’t like she’d been a permanent fixture in his life. Or her kids, either. He’d only met them the previous summer when he’d shown up to coach soccer to a bunch of underprivileged kids and met a little boy with a whole lot of defensiveness but a lot of talent, too. He’d been drawn to Jeremy from that very first day, thinking of him at odd times through the weeks that followed—trying to figure out a way to help him.

And the boy’s mother... He could still remember the first time he’d stopped by Jeremy’s house to speak to his parents about the boy’s talent. He’d thought Laura was the boy’s sister when she answered the door. Her silky blond hair had been hanging loose over a frayed tank top. And her cutoff shorts had had more holes in them than her tennis shoes.

He’d been poleaxed right from the start. And that was before she’d even opened her mouth, before he’d discovered her indomitable strength. Before he’d found out the good news—she was single. Divorced.

The Bronco sped down the exit ramp. Seth didn’t reduce his speed as he continued on.

And Susan. What in hell had gotten into his sister? Didn’t she know she was his hero? That he measured everything he did by her standards? How could she do something as stupid, as heartless, as to even consider bringing a child into the world simply because she’d written it down in her damn planner? Who was going to raise that child, nurture him, love him, while Susan spent fourteen hours a day at work?

The soccer field came into view before he slowed down enough to be cautious. Jeremy might not even be there. He’d probably quit practicing the second Seth walked out the door of his mother’s house. Or maybe it had been the next week, when he’d gone to soccer practice and discovered that Seth was no longer his coach.

At least he knew the kid was still on the team. He supposed that was something.

And what would Seth say to the boy if Jeremy was at the field by himself? “Hey, kid, good to see ya. Sorry you weren’t important enough to me.”

Right. Just what a nine-year-old needed to hear. Face it. That was exactly what Jeremy was thinking, anyway. The kid’s father had run out on him. He’d expected Seth to do the same. And Seth had obliged.

The field was empty, just as he’d realized it would be. Of course, it was January. Freezing. Who kicked around soccer balls at eight-thirty on a January night?

Jeremy would have. If Seth had still been around to encourage him. The boy had ability. And he loved to play. Soccer was the one thing that could help Seth get through to Jeremy. That could make Jeremy feel good about himself.

Driving by Laura’s house was a given.

Maybe he should stop in to say hello. Just to make sure they were all right. There were lights on in the front room, and a glow from the television that appeared to be Jeremy’s only solace these days, his only escape.

The front yard was still nothing but a tiny square of hard dirt; the sidewalk was cracked, pieces missing; half the porch sagged. He’d repeatedly offered to set her up in a better place, a better part of town. She’d refused every time. And when he couldn’t stand having her there any longer, when he’d found her a place on his own, made all the arrangements for her to move, when he’d insisted she accept his offer, she’d given him the ultimatum that had ended everything.