Louisa George - Enemies with Benefits

Tori had gone with Matt to South Africa. Izzy had moved in with Harry. That was it, all her friends out, happy, settled. Doing things with significant others—or, in Isaac’s case, insignificant others.

Was it too much to want a little bit of their collective happiness? Someone to care if she died alone, suffocated under a box of musty decorations or knocked out by a toppling balding Christmas tree, toes nibbled by starving mice. More, someone to care if she never ever had sex again. Like ever.

She imagined the headlines.

Doctor’s body found after three weeks! Nobody noticed recluse Poppy Spencer had died until the smell …

Or …

Miracle of regrown hymen! Autopsy of sad, lonely cat lady Poppy Spencer discovers born-again virgin …

No doubt somebody somewhere who bothered enough to listen would say she had lots of things to be thankful for. A good job—albeit varicose-vein inducing, with long hours of standing. Friends—albeit all absent. A flat—albeit leaky.

And a new, less-than-desirable flatmate, with fur. Which she would tackle, on her own, because she was a modern evolved woman … and not because she was the only person around to do it. Seriously. It was fine.

She took another decent mouthful of wine. Mr Mouse could wait; first, she’d cheer herself up and decorate the tree. Putting a hand into the box, she pulled out a bright red and silver bauble and almost cried. This was the first house-warming present Tori had bought her. Tori always bought the best presents; she had an innate sense of style.

And Poppy missed her.

‘No.’ More wine fortified her and put a fuzzy barrier between her and her wavering emotions. ‘It’s okay. I’m a grown up. I can be alone.’

She’d read, in an old tattered magazine in the doctors’ on-call room, about a famous reclusive actress who’d said that once. German? Swedish? Poppy couldn’t remember; in fact things seemed to have gone a little hazy altogether.

She picked up two baubles and hung them from her ears like large, gaudy earrings, grabbed a long piece of gold tinsel and draped it round her shoulders, like an expensive wrap over her brushed-cotton, pink-checked pyjamas. Lifted her chin and spoke loudly to the street below. ‘ I want to be alone. Or is it, I want to be alone …?’

Louder, just so she could feel the words and believe them, she shouted to the smattering of falling snowflakes illuminated by the streetlights, to the dark, cloudy sky, and to the people coming out of the Chinese takeaway with what looked like enough delicious food for a party. A far cry from her microwaved meal for one. ‘It’s fine. Really. You just go and enjoy yourselves with your jolly Christmas laughing and your cute bobbly hats and fifty spring rolls to share with your lovely friends and don’t worry about me. I’ll just stay here, on my own, and think about adopting a few stray cats or crocheting toilet-roll-holder dolls to pass the time. Crochet is the new black. It’ll be good for my … fine motor skills. I’m fine. I want to be alone. I do.’

‘Oh,’ came a voice from behind her. ‘In that case, I’ll leave you to it. Goodnight.’

‘Ah! What the hell?’

Isaac. She’d know that voice anywhere. Half posh, half street. All annoying. And very typical. Strange kind of skill he had, always turning up at her most embarrassing moments.

She winced, slowly swivelling, bringing her arms down to her sides—had she ranted out loud about her pathetic misery and lonesomeness?

Damn right she had.

The tinsel hung pathetically from her shoulders and the baubles bashed the sides of her reddening neck in a not-quite-in-tempo accompaniment to her heart rate. She probably looked a complete fool, but then, where Isaac was concerned, she was used to looking like a prize idiot.

He, however, looked his usual scruffy ‘male model meets bad-boy done good’ self. He needed a shave and a decent haircut; his usually cropped crew cut stood up in little tufts making him look angelic—which he wasn’t. His cheeks were all pinked-up by the cold winter air. A light dusting of snow graced his shoulders. No doubt some unknowing bimbo would think he looked adorable. But Poppy knew better. Isaac’s looks were deceiving.

He’d been part of the Spencer family’s life for so long he was almost a member of it, and had a habit of turning up like a bad penny at the entirely wrong time, giving her that disappointed shake of his head he’d perfected over the years. But it didn’t affect her quite as much as he hoped because her parents had been doing the exact same thing since she was in nappies.

And now he was here, occasionally living in her lovely flat, because her big brother, Alex, had let him rent a room without asking her first.

Isaac’s head shook. Disappointedly.

She feigned nonchalance because any kind of in-depth conversation with him was the last thing on her Christmas wish-list. ‘So, the missing flatmate returns.’

‘I wasn’t missing. I was working in Paris and then on to Amsterdam, checking out some decent bar venues.’

‘Oh, lucky for some. The other day I managed to get all the way to Paddington for a sexual-health meeting, and once I even made it to the dizzy heights of Edgware Road.’ She loved her job, she really did, but sometimes delving into women’s unmentionables lacked any kind of glamour. And definitely no travel—apart from visiting the dark underworld of repairing episiotomies and doing cervical smears. Where she discovered a lot of women were having a lot of sex. Sadly, she wasn’t one of them.

He shrugged. ‘Oh. You got a whole mile away. Whoop-de-doo. Aren’t you adventurous?’ The animosity was a two-way thing.

He dumped his large duffel bag on the floor and threw his coat on top, cool blue eyes roving her face, then her ears, the tinsel, her flannelette pyjamas. Which had to be the most sexless items of clothing she owned. Which didn’t matter. Isaac was just a flatmate. Her big brother’s best friend. Nothing else.

Apart from … weird, his eyes were vivid and bright and amused. And somebody else might well have thought they were attractive, but she didn’t. Not a bit. Not at all. They were too blue. Too cool. Too … knowing. He gave her one of his trademark long, slow smiles. Which didn’t work the way he might have hoped. She did a mental body scan to check. Nope. No reaction at all.

Through her pre-pubescent years she’d done everything to garner his attention—and had probably appeared as an exasperating little diva. Then she’d woken up to the reality that he was not interested, and then neither was she once she’d discovered bigger and—she’d thought—better men to chase. Real men, not teenage boys … and then … The shame shimmied through her and burned bright in her cheeks. Eight years and she still felt it.

Well, and then Isaac had been lost in the whole sordid slipstream.

He took a step forward and plucked the tinsel from her arm between his finger and thumb, gave it a sorry little look then let it drop to the floor like an undesirable. ‘I’m very sorry to have to break this to you, Poppy, but I think your Christmas fairy days might be over.’

Grabbing a bauble from her ear, she wrapped it round one of the needleless branches. Then did the same with the other one. In a last act of defiance she placed the tinsel from the floor in pride of place in the middle of the tree. ‘Well, gee, thanks.’

‘I just think it might be a little unstable.’ He glanced up at the wonky, droopy top of the tree, then watched her sway. ‘Like you perhaps?’

‘Hey, be rude about me all you like, that’s normal service. But you do not insult my tree.’ She eyed the wine bottle behind him. No harm in a little more. ‘Me and this tree have been together a long time, and no one’s going to criti … be rude about it. Pass me that glass?’ She pointed to the bottle and the glass and then realised that, irritating or not, she should at least be polite to him. Who knew? He might be an expert at rodent removal.