Margaret Daley - Heart of A Cowboy

“No. Where’s your husband?” His gaze held hers captive, a hard glitter to his eyes.

What happened to your fiancée? She bit the inside of her mouth to keep the words inside. She wouldn’t let him know how much that had hurt her when she’d discovered he’d moved on only seven months after they had broken up. “I’m not married.”

“What happened to Nicholas’s father?”

“He hasn’t been in the picture for quite some time.”

“Sorry to hear that—” he paused for a long moment “—for your son’s sake.”

But not mine. His unspoken words cut her to the core. The pain sliced through her in spite of her efforts to distance herself. Anger rose. “How long have you been back in Tallgrass?”

“A couple of years. Becca found this ranch for sale for me. The deal was too good to turn down.”

“How’s your sister?” Becca had been the first one she’d talked to when she’d called after the doctor had told her she was pregnant. She’d only been at art school in Savannah for two and a half months. The news had rocked her world, and she hadn’t known what to do. She’d desperately needed to talk with Zachary, but he’d enlisted in the army and was at boot camp. Becca had promised her she would tell Zachary to call. He never did.

“She’s still married to the same man, and they have three kids. They live here on the ranch, too. Ashley is the oldest.”

Jordan glanced toward the children. Zachary’s niece slid from her horse and tied its rein on a tree limb. Jordan nudged her mare to go faster as Jana and Randy dismounted, too. Her son started to bring his leg over and drop to the ground.

“Hold it, Nicholas,” she shouted, mentally measuring the long distance from the horse to the patch of grass below the mare. “I’ll help you.”

“Jordan, he’s doing fine. Let him do it himself. That’s the way he’ll learn.”

She slanted a look toward Zachary. “But…”

“See.” Zachary pointed toward her son, who’d slipped to the ground and like the others was tying up his horse. “Why are you so protective?”

“That’s how mothers are supposed to be.” She’d come so close to losing Nicholas. She didn’t know what she would have done if he’d died. He was her world.

“Yes, protect but not smother.”

“What do you know about being a parent?” Her hands curled around the reins, and she pulled harder than she should have to halt the mare. He hadn’t wanted children, or at least that was the impression she’d gotten when they had talked about the future right after high school graduation. At the time, his dreams had centered around the rodeo—not having a family.

A flicker of pain glinted in his eyes before a frown descended. “You’re right. I don’t have personal experience raising a child, but I was a boy once. I know he needs a little breathing room.”

He dismounted and strode away from her before she could think of a retort, some kind of defense for herself. She shouldn’t have lashed out at him. He was right. Nicholas had told her that on more than one occasion, especially when she’d wanted to march up to the last school and face those kids who’d teased Nicholas and made fun of him. If it had started again, she would have to do something different. She wouldn’t let her son be miserable for another school year.

Zachary stood at the edge of the stream that ran through his property and watched the kids wade across it. Their giggles peppered the air and brought a smile to his mouth. He’d enjoyed living near his niece and nephews, but at night he always went home to an empty house with no child’s laughter to fill it or bedtime stories to tell. And yet, Jordan had moved on with her life and had all of that with Nicholas.

The boy captured his attention as he bent down and stared at something on the ground. He picked it up and straightened. When he saw Zachary staring at him, Jordan’s son crossed the creek and approached him.

“Look what I found. This is a Terrapene carolina triunguis.” Nicholas held it up for Zachary to see. His expression must have conveyed surprise because the child added, “A three-toed box turtle. They were common where I used to live. They eat insects, worms, fish, berries, snakes.”

“Did you have one as a pet?”

“No. They’re better off in their natural habitat. I have a dog named Tucker.”

What eight-year-old kid knew the scientific name of a turtle? At least he assumed that was what the child spouted off. “Do you like science a lot?”

Nicholas shrugged. “It’s okay. I really enjoy math the most. I’ve been working on algebra, but tell you a secret—” he leaned toward Zachary “—Mom’s not very good at it. I have to teach myself.”

“Teach yourself? That’s mighty ambitious.”

“I love to learn.” Nicholas set the turtle on the ground.

Like his mother. Jordan had always been a good student while he’d been more interested in sports, especially riding. She’d helped him with his classwork and he’d taught her to ride. For a brief moment he allowed himself to recall some of the good times he and Jordan had in high school—when she’d helped him cram for a test and he’d made an A or when he’d worked odd jobs to save enough to buy her a necklace the first Christmas they’d been together. The glimpse of her smile had made it all worth it. Randy’s voice calling Nicholas pulled Zachary away from the past—thankfully. He didn’t need to remember.

Jordan’s son flashed him a smile. “Gotta go.” He whirled and raced toward the other kids.

Zachary watched the children talking. Nicholas pointed at something in the creek and Jana squealed, ducking behind Randy. A brown, foot-long snake slithered through the water. Zachary slid his attention to Jordan. Her eyes grew round, and she backed away from the stream. She never did like snakes.

He chuckled, remembering that time he’d found one on her porch. She’d jumped into his arms so fast he’d staggered back, almost losing his balance. But he’d recovered and tightened his embrace, cradling her against him. The onslaught of memories cracked a fissure in the wall about his emotions.

Those carefree days were over. She’d walked away from him and never looked back.

“We better get back to the barn.” Zachary started for his horse.

“Do we hafta, Uncle Zachary?”

He glanced at his niece. “Yeah, Alexa will be here to pick up Jana.”

Nicholas had already crossed the stream while the other three were still on the opposite side. They reluctantly followed. For a few seconds a yearning for what he didn’t have inundated Zachary. But he pushed it aside. He just had to be satisfied with having a niece and two nephews. And staying out of Jordan’s way.

Sore, Jordan slid to the ground back at the barn half an hour later, keeping her eye on her son to make sure he dismounted okay. He did, almost like a pro. She had to admit everything Nicholas did he did well. He was quick to pick up things. But usually they weren’t physical activities.

Jordan caught sight of Zachary taking a few extra moments to explain to her son how to take care of his horse after a ride. Nicholas absorbed what Zachary told him with his usual intense concentration. She knew that after this he wouldn’t have to be told again. Zachary patted him on the shoulder. The smile her son gave Zachary right before he strode away to tend to his gelding stirred doubts in her that she hadn’t made a good choice all those years ago.

That brief scene confirmed she had to tell Zachary about Nicholas soon. There was no way she could keep her secret if they were both living in such a small town. He was bound to find out some way or another. She still didn’t know how she would break the news. Tell Zachary first or Nicholas? She felt in over her head. But maybe this was one of the reasons she’d finally come home. She wanted Nicholas to be surrounded by family—even Zachary’s. It would be to her son’s benefit, and maybe for once, she wouldn’t feel so alone in this world. Yes, she’d always had the support of her mother, grandmother and sister, but long-distance support wasn’t the same as immediate face-to-face interactions. And yet, for years she’d lived far away from that support because of her feelings toward Zachary.